Overwhelmed with new property. Trying to avoid panic-selling.

Soot2006

You've thrown yourself straight into the "big renovation", which is fine, but explains feeling overwhelmed. Fwiw I think that house looks  lovely. Old and tired, but when you get the decor right you'll have a proper cottage there.  Sadly, I'd no good at real advice as I also tend to rip things up and then wish I hadn't started. I learned the lesson this time round and happily laid my laminate over the old tiles - saved me lots of stress

chris_n

Why not fit a heat pump, they are very popular in Germany so the installers know how to do them properly unlike many in UK it would seem.

mickeyg14

I've been there.  The house looks great and you get to put your own mark on it.  It's only natural to start doubting your decision.  It sounds like you're getting some steps for a plan and writing stuff down and breaking it into small steps always helps.  You sound like your tacking the problem logically.  Great news that the surveyor didnt find any major problems.

I find not asking why questions (why did we do this, why didn't I make a different decision, why wasn't i more assertive, why didn't I get a survey) just lead down a spiral.  Instead acknowledge its natural and ask how questions.  How can I improve the situation? How can I get some help?  How is this the best thing that ever happened to me (learn some new skills, make our home our own, have pride in what I achieve, have plenty of tales and stories to tell about diy successes and disasters), see it as an adventure. 

I had no diy experience when I was refurbing my home and the previous owner had lived here since the 50s.  I watched youtube videos/channels and just took it bit by bit.  I made lots of mistakes but gradually learned  step by step.  It was getting over the intial fear and building momentum.  But I feel pride in what I acheived.  Not enough to stop me occastionally thinking why didn't I do this or that.  

Other potential tips schedule a worry time every day where you just talk about or write down all your worries and fears and just try and get it out of your system.  

jcuurthht

Soot2006 said:

You've thrown yourself straight into the "big renovation", which is fine, but explains feeling overwhelmed. Fwiw I think that house looks  lovely. Old and tired, but when you get the decor right you'll have a proper cottage there.  Sadly, I'd no good at real advice as I also tend to rip things up and then wish I hadn't started. I learned the lesson this time round and happily laid my laminate over the old tiles - saved me lots of stress

The laminate in those rooms is actually laid over tiles. My wife wants to pull up the laminate and tiles, and also take down all the wooden ceilings. I suggested either painting them, or putting in false ceilings.

jcuurthht

chris_n said:

Why not fit a heat pump, they are very popular in Germany so the installers know how to do them properly unlike many in UK it would seem.

They don't work efficiently unless the property is very well insulated. It's difficult to insulate such old properties very well.

kdotdotdotdot

mickeyg14 said:

Other potential tips schedule a worry time every day where you just talk about or write down all your worries and fears and just try and get it out of your system.  

That's a great suggestion.  Or maybe schedule half a day to worry and the other half of the day to do something really fun and enjoyable that has nothing to do with house or renovations?  You'll come back the next day refreshed and energised to go.

Ectophile

If it's original 1950's wiring, it probably needs ripping out and replacing.  Anything from the 1960's or later might be upgradeable to modern standards.

The reason for the difference is that PVC insulated wire was brought in during the 1960's, and that stuff can last for decades without any real deterioration.

MovingForwards

Assuming the age / trends are on par with the UK, you've a newer kitchen and bathroom than I have. All I've done with the rest of my home is paint the dark wood white, it's a lot less imposing and light bounces off it. I've pulled up the lounge carpet revealing laminate. Gone round filling gaps to stop draughts and live in it while flipping between various ideas.

Anyhow, what you need to do is stop and give yourself time to breathe. Don't start doing major changes eg removing walls, moving rooms around such as kitchen or bathroom needing plumbing etc without living in the property and getting a feel for how it works with your lifestyle.

Looks like you'll have a fantastic home!

jcuurthht

MovingForwards said:

Assuming the age / trends are on par with the UK, you've a newer kitchen and bathroom than I have. All I've done with the rest of my home is paint the dark wood white, it's a lot less imposing and light bounces off it. I've pulled up the lounge carpet revealing laminate. Gone round filling gaps to stop draughts and live in it while flipping between various ideas.

Anyhow, what you need to do is stop and give yourself time to breathe. Don't start doing major changes eg removing walls, moving rooms around such as kitchen or bathroom needing plumbing etc without living in the property and getting a feel for how it works with your lifestyle.

Looks like you'll have a fantastic home!

Yes initially we wanted to renovate the bedroom and office then move in. Get a feel for the place and continue renovations slowly while living there and having more time to decide.

MalMonroe

Hi, from what you say your wife appears to be quite undaunted. Don't forget that you are in this together. Make it into an adventure if possible. I think you'll be absolutely fine. When my daughter was tiny, my ex (sorry not that I'm saying that will happen to you) and I bought a very old house and I had buyer's remorse the day after. He thought we could make into a home and he was right but I could never see the potential at the outset. Particularly as the building society wouldn't release the whole of the mortgage until we'd had the place rewired and re-plumbed. We moved out a few years later (it still wasn't finished!) and into a new build - with no character. Buyer's remorse again - although it was quite nice being in a brand new home.

Our old house sold for around £350k five years or so ago. Average house price on the same road now is £450k. And I'm in a council flat. (Could I kick myself? A little bit, yes.) I mean the flat is one of a block of only two in a rurally based cul-de-sac, it could be much worse but I'm now paying rent, whereas had we stayed in that house, the mortgage would be paid off and I'd be in a very different situation.

I think you could just try to relax and enjoy being with your wife in your new home, whatever it needs doing to it. She's going to be happier and that may just well rub off on you. I wouldn't advise anyone to have the same attitude as me all those years ago because some things really matter and some things don't. You'll find out once you move.