Crap with money

gug66666

Hello everyone…. 

I’m so sorry to whinge, but I am in such a dark place right now, and I’m so crap with money, I just don’t know where to start!
I’ve only got myself to blame and that’s what really hurts….
If anyone has any suggestions please please just give me a shout, it would very much be appreciated 😊

Robin9

Start with a very simple diary - record every penny spent, every coffee, every Contactless spend, every payment onto your credit card, every payment through your bank, every DD.

When you have that you can ask questions ?   Why did I buy 17 coffees ? 
 ?

Ebe_Scrooge

As above, a spending diary is an invaluable tool to begin with.  But make sure you're honest with yourself - record every penny you spend, don't "conveniently forget" that sandwich you bought at lunchtime.

The other angle of attack is to draw up a budget - you can use any one of the dozens of free tools available online, or else just draw up a simple spreadsheet - or even pen and paper - yourself.  A popular one that's often used on this site is https://www.lemonfool.co.uk/financecalculators/soa.php

List your income and your outgoings.  Income can be salary, benefits, interest on savings, whatever.  Outgoings - begin with the essentials such as mortgage/rent, insurance, food, utility bills, etc.  The SOA referenced above will give you each category.

Essentially, if you're not in debt (or you're servicing your debt without any issues), then this will show you how much "spare" money you should have left at the end of every month.  If you've got no spare money, then you've got to be disciplined and forego the little treats and discretionary spends.  If you're comfortably-off then OK you can treat yourself to take-aways, meals out, whatever it may be.  But you've got to get a handle on your income versus your "essential" outgoings before you can begin to see where you are.

StepChange_Allen

gug66666 said:

Hello everyone…. 

I’m so sorry to whinge, but I am in such a dark place right now, and I’m so crap with money, I just don’t know where to start!
I’ve only got myself to blame and that’s what really hurts….
If anyone has any suggestions please please just give me a shout, it would very much be appreciated 😊

Hello

I'm sorry to hear that you're in a dark place and struggling with money. The above posts have some good tips in if it's a budgeting issue. If you have some debts that you're struggling with, then we can help at StepChange. We're a debt charity and primarily work out solutions for people struggling with debts, though we do give budgeting advice too where required.

You can give us a call free on 0800 138 1111 or go online at www.stepchange.org

There's no cost for the service at all, and our advisors are well trained to give you the best possible advice for your situation.

If you're struggling with your mental health, it's best to start with seeing your GP if you haven't already, but you can also access some great free mental health support at charities like MIND - www.mind.org.uk

Best wishes
Allen
Debt Advisor at StepChange

chubsta

As others have said, the first step is record EVERYTHING. I set up a very simple spreadsheet on my computer and put in my wages and then every little bit of money I spent was on there, with the reason for it. It is particularly easy these days to just flash the card and get something without really thinking about it, to me using a card doesn't seem like spending money whereas the old way of physically pulling some notes out of your wallet and watching them disappear made me think more about where it was going.
Only when you can see where the money goes can you really take control of it - as mentioned above, daily sandwiches or snacks seem like such a small thing until you tally them all up at the end of the month and then realise you have spent 10 times as much as you would have done had you made your own.
Fortunately, admitting you are 'crap with money' is a brilliant place to be - you have taken perhaps the biggest step in admitting to yourself you need to change, no more 'head in the sand' until it is unsurmountable and crashes back down.

EssexHebridean

Are you really crap with money? Or perhaps right now do you not really understand how budgeting works, don't know how is best to work out what you have available to spend in certain categories and so far have been too lazy to try to find out? Sorry if that sounds brutal - but it's amazing how many people go through life claiming to be terrible with money or "not have a head for financial stuff" and then, with a lightbulb moment and a relatively small (for the payback you get) level of effort, find out that in fact, they can manage things perfectly well when they try! (Guess how I know? Yep - for YEARS that was me!) Knowledge is power - generally, but never more so than with financial stuff - so work out what you need to know, and set about finding that information and making it work for you.

The SOA suggested above is a brilliant starting point - and in fact needs to come higher in your list of importance than a spending diary. there's no sense in knowing what you DO spend without knowing whether you could afford to spend it!  So SOA first - get together a years worth of bank and card statements and sit down and get everything filled out. Stop and think about anything you usually pay cash for - in fact add up your cash withdrawals for each month too and see how those look as in a lot of cases people find that's "lost money" as it gets frittered. (That's where the spending diary will help you track) Make sure you remember the "one off" annual spends too - insurances etc if you pay those up front. Make the SOA as open and honest as you can - otherwise the only person you're kidding on is yourself, and the whole exercise becomes pointless. 

Once you have the SOA completed you could post it into this thread if you like and we can point out any possible savings you might have missed, or areas you've not considered budgeting for that should probably be considered. when it's all complete it will inform your budget going forwards - so if you have £2000 coming in per month but you need £1500 of that for priority bills, food, travel and commitments like memberships/subscriptions and any debt repayments you might be making, that then tell you how much you can save, how much you can budget for general spending - "fun money" if you like - and whether you can afford that sticky bun with a coffee/nice new pair of boots/trip out with friends at the weekend. If you ARE in debt then you may well make a choice to sacrifice all those previous to overpay on those debts and get them cleared faster.