Desperate for Help

weenancyinAmerica

Thank you for your posts Jackie. I save many of them into Word so I can go back and reread them when I need a boost. 

cbsexec

I think a lot of people are being terrified by all the scare stories in the press.   But there are ways to eat well and cheaply and keep warm as Jackie O says.  The help on these boards is amazing and we should spread the word to anyone we know who needs it.   I always try and get anyone I know who’s struggling to look at these boards.  They saved me from going under when my family had hard times.

t33

I'm so sorry to hear of your situation, and you are not alone in this.  Lots of excellent advice and recipes etc. as usual on this fabulous forum but for some - perhaps many - living more frugally and a stiff upper lip will not be enough.  Please, if it is possible, think about reaching out to family, friends, neighbours as well as social services, local charities and faith groups.  Some neighbours of mine are already behind with bills and they are both working full time and live very carefully, so it can happen to anyone in various circumstances.

Best wishes.

YorksLass

DaysofQuiet - Things are getting tough - and will probably continue to do so for some time to come - so I can understand your worries.  Lots of helpful advice on this and other threads so take some time out, have a cuppa and think about what you can do rather than what you can't.  The Grocery Challenge thread has lots of recipes that might be useful for you.

I find it helpful to have a list of inexpensive but nutritious meals that you would eat and can make using the hob etc rather than using the oven.  Costing out those meals per portion can be a real eye opener too.  Take advantage of any ys items you come across (eg for soups).  Go for wonky F&V - cheaper and looks/tastes the same as the more expensive stuff, once prepped and chopped.  Shop seasonally.  Make a friend of your freezer - if you could batch cook/portion up you'll soon build up a stock of hm ready meals that just need defrosting/reheating.  Make the best of left overs - many a time we have a meal that's made up of these.

If you've definitely decided to not put any heating on at all then you'll need one hot meal a day (maybe soup and a sandwich?), hot drinks, warm clothing, sofa throws etc.  Keep active - Jackie's post about where you could go, what you could do etc has some good ideas.

Above all, don't be too hard on yourself.  Living frugally and stretching out the pennies is hard work, especially when you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel.  I would echo t33's post that living frugally and a stiff upper lip might not be enough for some.  Source and accept any offer of help that might come your way, if you can.  And give yourself a small treat now and again - we all deserve one at times!  

Longwalker

DaysofQuiet said:

I have a teenage son. He will (rightly so) not forgo a shower (electric) once a day....but I've asked him to have quick showers. we have a combi boiler. How does having a shallow bath compare to a 5 min shower???

Please dont think Im having a go at you personally, but where did this "rightly so attitude "come from ?

Back when me and Jackie were younger, going through the last energy crisis, we didnt rightly so need a shower daily. I couldn't afford to put the immersion on for more then two hours a week, so my bathing was a bath once a week and a wash basin wash - filled from the kettle  - and washed my hair the same way - with a cold water rinse every day. I had one gas fire to heat my whole flat and in the winter, my bed went in the living room 

Yes I do shower daily now, Im the bill payer still, and Im in and out in two minutes, and I have a filthy job. Same as Mr L, he takes a bit longer, but no more then 5 mins

There are a load of calculators online that will price a 5 min shower, and running an electric one possibly costs more running it for 5 minutes then running the oven for an hour  - I could possibly be wrong 

Its going to be tough for a few years yet and we are all having to make hard choices. We all need to heat and eat

Back in my ( and Jackies and many more of us ) day, only one room in the house was lit and heated  - the living room. No heat in the bedrooms at all and certainly none in the bathroom. We sat as a family in the one room. We ( my family) kind of live like that now, we have one room lit and heated, I have sensor lights in the hallways and stairs, all lights are LEDs , the only rads that are turned on are in mums bedroom/bathroom and living room - for 3 hours a day. Me and Mr L manage in these cooler days with a blanket and warmer clothes ( our heating is oil and thats linked to the price of diesel and its scary , more scary then electric at the moment ) We will have the lamp on, and the tv or radio. If I want to do my nails or read a book, I do it in the same room, with an LED directional lamp - the other rooms are now too chilly to be sat in

For your mum, I know this sounds like going back a century, but she would be better closing down most of her rooms for the winter, She will be getting the help from the government and cold winter payments etc I assume? But she would be best on keeping just her living room and bedroom warm enough to live in. It does have its disadvantages - cold rooms can get mould unless they are regularly aired but you can plan ahead, move furniture away from walls , double line curtains ( pinning cheap fleeces to them ) going in daily to open the windows for a few minutes to change the air. If the property is old and leaky, get draught excluders around the doors , curtains for the front and back doors 

And to stop going into a cold kitchen, fill the thermos with hot water to make hot drinks during the day, batch cook once a week and have meals portioned up in the freezer to be microwaved. Food doesn't need to be hot to be warming, you need proteins and carbs and they can be eaten cold, you need the heat for the hug, for the feeling of warmth 

Im wishing you, and all of us, the best, for most of us its going to be hard, for some of us we have been here before and know how to buffer ourselves and we know whilst its going to be tough we will get through it 

badmemory

I think you may be worrying needlessly about oven usage.  I cook almost every day, last month I used 1 unit of gas as the heating didn't come on.  It is a very old cooker & when the oven is on a lot of heat seems to leak out.  I am a lot more worried about the usage of my (also very old) fridge & freezer.  I worked out that those 2 things alone are going to be costing me £2 a day at least with the new prices.

poppy811

Longwalker, another one who feels the same as you and I suspect much the same vintage!
  We all have to prioritise what is most important 

London_1

Longwalker I'm echoing your sentiments entirely and poppy811 as well perhaps its because we are from a dfferent generation that we see things in a different light.

I grew up in the 1940s and 50s when times  were pretty lean to say the least, a bag of coal a week if you were lucky enough to be on the good side of the coalie.
The winter of 47 was pretty bleak for thousands of people. But our Mums having survived the war and bombing were going to make sure we survived almost anything thrown at us.

Everything you could reuse, was recycled or burnt and our dust bins were never very full of anything but dust food was streeetched to its limits, and its amazing what you can manage, with even the most basic of foodstuff with some ingenuity and a few herbs and spices 
I got my love of those from my late Mum, who could turn the blandest of food into something tasty bless her, and I've always had a good store cupboard of them to zing up my meals.

Times today are different and are hard and will become harder through this coming winter but we will get through it and survive as most of my generation did. Utilising everything you can and making the most of what you've actually got will help and if it means you cut down on a few things then you certainly won't die without a ten minute shower a day.

I enjoy my daily shower and can be in and out in three to four minutes, and that includes washing my hair (good job its fairly short ) But if I had to cut back to one or two a week with a "sailors wash" inbetween then I would 

I have an electric throw that I can use when watching tv when its really cold and I also have a nice zip up sleeeping bag that I can also use to tuck myself into on days when its not cold enough for the CH but just a bit nippy ,or layer up with some wooly tights under trousers when I go out
Last year Tescos had some nice ones for under a fiver and I got three pairs so I'm sorted for this winter. I also have various throws and a pair of bootee type slippers that my grandson bought for me which keep my feet toasty. 
Then there is the old favourite of a couple of hot water bottles a blessing in disguise at times.

I have a large thermos I bought a couple of years ago at the end of the season in a local camping equipement shop and its great for filling up with the left over water from the kettle for hot drinks during the day I like hot bovril sometimes on nippy days in mid winter . I also have another thermos I keep just for soups its a bit smaller but if I decied to have a bit of fresh air and goto my local park for a walk its great for a nice hot drink as usually the little cafes are closed in the winter.

Lots of things to keep you warm, I even have a little warm bag of I think inside is rice, my daughter bought for me that you put into the microwave to heat up for about thirty seconds and then I have that on my lap to warm my hands on if I'm watching tv.

Sadly as you get older you tend to feel the cold more I think, especially your extremities feet, hands etc and keeping them warm is important, especially if you are not very mobile.
 
  I have osteo-arthritis, and in damp weather my joints seize up a bit, and ache as well so keeping warm is important for me to keep as healthy as I can. I'm known by my family to wear a jaunty bobble hat indoors as well to keep my body heat in I have a few my grandsons have bought for me and the dafter the better as one needs to smile at adversity don't you think  

So if you see a dappy old dear hobbling around the park with a daft bobble hat on, and swigging from a thermos, its not gin in there its more likely to be tomato soup  

Roll on the spring chums 

JackieO xxx

NorthernMonkey1

Longwalker said:

There are a load of calculators online that will price a 5 min shower, and running an electric one possibly costs more running it for 5 minutes then running the oven for an hour  - I could possibly be wrong 

Your shower will be using 10kw of electricity. At the current price of 28p/kwh, thats £2.80 per hour. If the prices rise as expected, it'll be £5 an hour, or 8p per minute

MovingForwards

I have a long shower once a week, OH has short daily showers. We both work from home, with dual screens etc, after work I'm on my own dual set up and weekends. My OH uses his own single set up all evening / weekends and it's rigged up to our TV.

We only use ceiling lights in the kitchen and bathroom when dark, single in each, switched off after use. We have a lamp in the lounge which gets switched on about 10pm, use a rechargeable reading light in the bedroom. 

Aside from that its mobile phone charging and internet router.

On average it's 115 units of electric we use a month £48.55, including standing charge was the last bill.

Gas is hot water on demand, hob and oven most of the year. We average 9 units a month and the latest bill was £16.91, including standing charge.

Obviously in winter, when it's cold, we have the GCH on in 15 minute bursts; once in the morning while getting ready, then from about 7pm until about 9pm in the evenings and it's more off than on. 
It's an old property we own and we have the windows open nearly all year round in the day.

Although I'm not of the age mentioned by others in this thread, my experiences growing up were no different with a single bath once a week, one heater in the lounge etc. I'm fast approaching my 6th year with double glazing and my 4th year with GCH, I can't get out the habit of using blankets, jumpers and a hot water bottle when it starts to get cold.