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Considering IVA - end of my tether

bunnymtg
Posts: 54 Forumite
Hey guys
Please no bashing! I have already spent the evening in tears. I feel like such a failure. Like a sh*t mum and absolute mess.
I don't know how this has all spiralled so much. Now that my 0% has ended on everything in the last year, my outgoings are crippling me and now I've started to miss payments.
My monthly outgoings with debt total £2,500. I'm self employed and have found its quiet with the cost of living, so I'm really struggling to pay everything on time now. Its really gotten to me.
I called Mums In Debt earlier and they recommend an IVA. We recently sold our flat and moved into rented as we needed the space and hope to get back on the property ladder in 3 years time. But I'm worried an IVA would hinder that massively for me.
I don't know what to do I feel so totally out of my depth and with no way out that I can see of.
Would love some advice please.
R
Please no bashing! I have already spent the evening in tears. I feel like such a failure. Like a sh*t mum and absolute mess.
I don't know how this has all spiralled so much. Now that my 0% has ended on everything in the last year, my outgoings are crippling me and now I've started to miss payments.
My monthly outgoings with debt total £2,500. I'm self employed and have found its quiet with the cost of living, so I'm really struggling to pay everything on time now. Its really gotten to me.
I called Mums In Debt earlier and they recommend an IVA. We recently sold our flat and moved into rented as we needed the space and hope to get back on the property ladder in 3 years time. But I'm worried an IVA would hinder that massively for me.
I don't know what to do I feel so totally out of my depth and with no way out that I can see of.
Would love some advice please.
R
0
Comments
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Ignore mums in debt, from a quick glance it looks like they deal in IVAs. Unless you have an asset or job to protect, there will often be a better solution. Please speak to one of the free debt charities instead.2
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bunnymtg said:Hey guys
Please no bashing! I have already spent the evening in tears. I feel like such a failure. Like a sh*t mum and absolute mess.
I don't know how this has all spiralled so much. Now that my 0% has ended on everything in the last year, my outgoings are crippling me and now I've started to miss payments.
My monthly outgoings with debt total £2,500. I'm self employed and have found its quiet with the cost of living, so I'm really struggling to pay everything on time now. Its really gotten to me.
I called Mums In Debt earlier and they recommend an IVA. We recently sold our flat and moved into rented as we needed the space and hope to get back on the property ladder in 3 years time. But I'm worried an IVA would hinder that massively for me.
I don't know what to do I feel so totally out of my depth and with no way out that I can see of.
Would love some advice please.
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My Debt Free Diary >>>>>https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6360269/desperate-to-sort-my-life-for-last-time0 -
bunnymtg
Please contact one of the free debt charities; links nicked from sourcrates.
For free debt advice, contact either : Stepchange, National Debtline, CitizensAdviceBureaux.
IVAs are sometime suitable for people who have substantial assets to protect like a house, and at least £30K in debt. The fees charged to run the IVA are high and there are lots of companies advertising a "Government approved" debt remedy. It's covered by law but it's no more Government approved than your credit cards.
If you want to get back into the housing market other options may be more suitable.
Much better to talk to one of the debt charities and discuss with them.
If you are happy to share your finances here, do a Statement of Affairs and people may be able to help you work out how to pay off the debt most effectively.If you've have not made a mistake, you've made nothing1 -
bunnymtg said:Hey guys
Please no bashing! I have already spent the evening in tears. I feel like such a failure. Like a sh*t mum and absolute mess.
I don't know how this has all spiralled so much. Now that my 0% has ended on everything in the last year, my outgoings are crippling me and now I've started to miss payments.
My monthly outgoings with debt total £2,500. I'm self employed and have found its quiet with the cost of living, so I'm really struggling to pay everything on time now. Its really gotten to me.
I called Mums In Debt earlier and they recommend an IVA. We recently sold our flat and moved into rented as we needed the space and hope to get back on the property ladder in 3 years time. But I'm worried an IVA would hinder that massively for me.
I don't know what to do I feel so totally out of my depth and with no way out that I can see of.
Would love some advice please.
R
We would need more information to properly point you in the right direction. I'm reluctant to say what might/might not work based on the info you gave in your first post.
If you could complete a statement of affairs and maybe post in in the debt-free wannabe forum, you would get helpful, non-judgemental comments. That's a link to a calculator. Please format for mse3 -
RAS said:Please contact one of the free debt charities; links nicked from sourcrates.
For free debt advice, contact either : Stepchange, National Debtline, CitizensAdviceBureaux.2 -
Please do not be pushed into an IVA unless you're absolutely certain it's right for you. It looks like a great fix to all the stress but it can be an even worse option than bankruptcy.Stepchange advised me to get an IVA (high debt, modest income, no assets) and it was definitely the wrong thing for me. I got to the point where they sent me the massive packet of paperwork to sign, the final step to make the IVA binding. Then I looked into it deeper and realised bankruptcy was the best option for me after all. Now I'm discharged and if I'd been stuck in the IVA I'd still be paying money I couldn't afford for another 4 or 5 years.I'm not saying it's the same for you. But as you don't seem to have done much research yet other than the agency you called, I'd highly recommend getting separate advice from at least two different charities mentioned above, because even the good ones get it wrong sometimes.2
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Nothing constructive to add to the other comments but just wanted to say a lot of us have been there and managed to come through it. So don't despair.I’m a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on Debt Free Wannabe and Old Style Money Saving boards. If you need any help on these boards, do let me know. Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any posts you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button, or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. All views are my own and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.
"Never retract, never explain, never apologise; get things done and let them howl.” Nellie McClung
⭐️🏅😇0 -
As Brie, above, says.
I was also a single parent in despair. And I also felt at the end of my tether. I'm self-employed now but was just working part time when my husband left. Things quickly went downhill from there.
First I had a really big cry, and you've done that now. Then I sat and felt sorry for myself for a while. Then I phoned StepChange, who really did help me to change my life around.
So I would definitely recommend calling them because they can help self-employed people too. And talking to them on the phone rather than trying to contact them online really does help so much. They are in no way judgemental whatsoever. They are friendly and businesslike and only want to help. And it's free. It was such a relief to actually just talk to someone and tell them exactly how I feel. When the adviser said, 'we can help you', I cried again! So what? Crying's not always bad.
Telephone : 0800 138 1111. The website says they are open until 4pm today.
Please try not to feel like a failure. You're certainly not.Please note - taken from the Forum Rules and amended for my own personal use (with thanks) : It is up to you to investigate, check, double-check and check yet again before you make any decisions or take any action based on any information you glean from any of my posts. Although I do carry out careful research before posting and never intend to mislead or supply out-of-date or incorrect information, please do not rely 100% on what you are reading. Verify everything in order to protect yourself as you are responsible for any action you consequently take.0 -
As you are self-employed the free advice charities will refer you to Business Debtline (BDL) call them 0800 197 6026, Monday to Friday 9am - 8pm. They will give free advice and look at the best option for you and your business.Bankruptcy is often not the best option when you are self-employed especially if you are a partner or company director. If you are a sole trader it may be the best option or if your debts are under £30K a DRO might be. A Debt Management Plan might also be a better option depending on the time it would take you to pay it off and the forecast for your business. An IVA may even be the best option but think carefully before signing as it is a legally binding agreement.As mentioned your statement of affairs will give us the best chance of giving you the best advice.Things to think about are details of whether you are a sole trader, partner or director or some other form of self-employment? Is your business new and where do you see it in the next few years? A static turnover with the same sort of profits/income or increasing?Your non-priority debts such as credit cards, loans, catalogues, store cars etc will give you an informal hold of 30-60 days to get advice after missed payments. You can also apply for statutory breathing space that will give you 60 days whilst you get your debt advice. Always ask for and try to get the informal hold off your creditors first as you can only have standard breathing space 1 time every 12 months.The missed payments will already have made them send you the usual letters signposting you to the free debt advice charities but your self-employment means BDL are your best best.1
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