The Mental Debt Struggle...

Keedie

Thank you everyone, the funeral went as well as can be expected. I misjudged the weather and it was raining by the time we got to the wake, but we managed to avoid getting very wet as I luckily snagged a parking space right outside the entrance to the venue.

I ended up wearing the school trousers and trainers in the end and you were all right, no one seemed fussed by me wearing black trainers. Some people were also in comfortable trainers etc, so I didn't feel too awkward or disrespectful. I'm glad I didn't wear the dress as the cemetery was cold and my knees were warmer in the trousers than they would have been in tights. 

I drove the elderly couple from the church to the cemetery and then to the wake. They assumed I was taking them home too, so I didn't have the heart to do otherwise! It was pouring down with rain by the time we left and it would have been too much for them on the bus or spending money as pensioners on an Uber or something. They live about 20 minutes away from me I discovered, so it wasn't too much of a detour.

I am tired now with all the driving though, as I don't drive much anymore. I'm lying on my heated blanket now in my bed and thinking about life and all that I have to be grateful for. We never know when we are going to go, and seeing my friend in so much pain as he was so close to his mum, it really reminded me of losing my dad. But as it was the beginning of lockdown we couldn't hold a funeral so he never got the proper send off we wanted, but in a way it was nice, as it was just us immediate family and then we all went back to my mum's afterward and we didn't have to entertain anyone. He was buried within 3 days and I had whiplash with everything moving so fast, so it was comforting for us to just all be around each other. 

It's really funny as my friend and I met at uni, and my dad came to drop me off with one of my uncles on moving day and my friend's mum was also there and she was leaving as we arrived. Our parents were so shocked to see each other as they'd been friends for over 20 years at that point! And they lived 2 roads away from each other, but didn't realise that their kids were starting at the same uni, and fate put us in the same shared house on campus and we've been friends ever since. 

Aimingforthegoodlife

What a lovely story of friendship, and that your parents knew each other. I am sorry for your loss, as far as funerals go, it sounded like a lovely send off. Take good care of yourself xx

Keedie

Yes it's really funny how life goes isn't it @Aimingforthegoodlife? We worked out that we would have been dragged to the same parties as children and played together but had no recollection of one another by the time we saw each other at uni.

Last night I ended up having a long chat over whatsapp phone calls with another one of our uni flatmates who now lives in Brussels with her husband and two boys. We've not seen each other since my son was a toddler, as we've lived in different countries since she graduated. But I've decided that I need to travel more and make memories and not be so focused on trying to find the perfect time for things. So I'm looking forward to going to see her and my son is excited that we'll be taking the Eurostar as he's never been on it before. I went on it when I was a young teenager and I've not done it since, so I'm also looking forward to it.

I got a text from Barclaycard today telling me that my direct debit that I thought was coming out today or tomorrow, is coming out on 2 April2024. That doesn't work with paying off my current 0% interest plan as it has to be repaid in full before 1 April 2024. So I paid the £300 today instead, and I'll see what happens on Tuesday. Hopefully they don't take the payment again.

Cherryfudge

It must be a comfort to your friend to have that shared background of your parents' friendship with you. There will be memories you both have that will in time make you both smile.

I'm glad the trousers/trainers combo worked out well. Perhaps you need to raid the charity donations from your son again before taking the bags to the shop! Things like tee shirts might suddenly reappear in your wardrobe.

I hope you're recovered from all the driving now.

Keedie

Yeah it is a comfort to have that shared background @Cherryfudge. And yes, I will raid his charity bag to see if there's anything else I fancy 😂.

I realised I made a bit of a boo boo with the direct debit for Barclaycard 🤦🏾‍♀️. I checked my Barclaycard account and it says the £300 direct debit for 2 April is too late to cancel 😬. So it looks like in my rush to avoid interest on this 0% plan that ends on 1 April, with me paying £300 today, I've accidentally doubled my payment. Oh dear. That's going to take some rejigging of the budget for April... 🤦🏾‍♀️.

Luckily I've been accumulating money throughout March for April's budget and there's double PIP for me in April as it's paid every 4 weeks and so once a year, I get it twice in a month as there's 13 payments a year. But that money was supposed to go towards getting back on top of things financially as things are still a bit behind following all them months of half sick pay. 

Cherryfudge

That's a nuisance about the direct debit - could you perhaps move the debit date to the end of the month or is that included in what's not allowed? Anything paid off though is to your advantage in the longer term, so perhaps this is just a way to bring forward your final payment and reduce interest?

P.S. Just read about your possible trip - sounds like a very nice thing to have to look forward to!

AntoMac

Didn’t you up the Barclaycard DD above the minimum payment Keedie? Perhaps you could reduce it to the minimum payment this month to claw a bit of the extra £300 back?

Funnily enough I was in Liverpool at the weekend for a break. I love the Scouse accent too, although had to just nod and pretend I could understand what they were actually saying once or twice 

Keedie

The problem with the Barclaycard direct debit is that I didn't bother to read the statement, as it said 2 April 2024. If I was more on the ball I would have seen that it wasn't being paid in March, as it usually gets taken between the 27th to 29th of the month, but with the Easter bank holidays, it's been delayed. If I'd made the payment earlier in the month, it would have cancelled out the direct debit (well that's been the case when I've done it before anyways).

It's all on zero interest, but not paying enough attention has left me a bit short. But I can juggle things in April and I'll have to use some of May's universal credit for my expenses in May. Usually I'd live off the previous month's income, but things will have to be staggered over the coming few months to accommodate it. From 1 April I should be accumulating the money for May 2024, and I'll continue to do that, but as I'll be £300 short, when my universal credit comes on 1 May, instead of starting to save everything for June 24's budget, I'll just hold back £100. And I'll do that until the budget realigns itself. I'll also get some more freelancing done to cushion the blow of the unexpected spending. Oh well.

I think I need to ask them after the direct debit next week comes out, if I can just pay it at the beginning of the month anyways @Cherryfudge. As this isn't the first time I've expected a direct debit to come out and then it's been delayed into the following month. The money just sits there all month waiting to be collected, so I'd prefer it to come out earlier in the month. Especially as each 0% interest plan seems to end on the 1st of the month. And I don't want to end up in the same situation. Although, I've learned my lesson about not reading the statements properly 🤦🏾‍♀️😂.

And yes, I pay over the minimum @AntoMac as I pay £300 a month and the minimum for this month was £261. With this little snafu, by the time the extra payment comes out and my statement is produced, the minimum will drop down to £243 as the balance will be coming down. Barclaycard's minimum payment is 3% of the balance and it'll be £8,100 by then, so the minimum will be £243.

I love the Scouse, Mancunion, Welsh, Irish and Scottish accents. They're either very lyrical/poetic in the way that they flow, or it sounds like a completely different language to me and I find that fascinating. I can't always hear very well as I have Auditory Processing Disorder, and so I often lip read, so it's a bit of challenge sometimes to understand different accents, but I still love it. I wish I was blessed with the kind of brain that could easily pick up languages as I'd love to be a polyglot. Life must be such an adventure if you can speak more than one language.

beanielou

Scottish accents are fantastic.  

AntoMac

I agree @beanielou although all of the accents of the Uk fascinate me, especially the variations over such short differences. Wife’s cousin has a boyfriend from Aberdeen. He was getting cross that Alexa couldn’t understand him, and the more cross he got the broader he became, and the less Alexa could understand him 
 My dad was a Scot. When Mum and Dad lived up there the locals thought she (West Country) was American! With more freedom of travel accents are becoming more and more diluted. My favourite was a Dutch friend who lived in Birmingham and developed a great Dutch Brummie accent. I think what makes us all different is what makes us all interesting. 

Anyway, enough of this rambling. You have proved with your little DD faux pas @Keedie that every day is a learning day - Did you like that little bit of French there?! 

A learning day for me too as I had to look up what snafu means