Learning to walk before I run

SuperSecretSquirrel

5 figure DB already in the bag at 43 is pretty incredible 🍻 Add on a couple of full SPs, and Mrs Eds personal provision, and you appear to be in an excellent future position!

I'd definitely be looking at ways to move a bit towards SCs suggestion - a bit less pension focus and a bit more enjoying the journey.

Is the flat out refusal to drop to 30 hours a current pressures thing, or a likely forever thing? Could that request while regularly working overtime be causing some mixed messages? Could they be worried about the reduction in contracted hours simply resulting in more costly overtime if you didn't really  end up working fewer hours?

Would a similar job in a neighbouring county be possible? I wouldn't for a second suggest more of the same at an 18k drop and 100 mile commute, but is that the only game in town or is it more a matter of keeping eyes peeled for a better option closer to home?

If there really is no way out in the short to medium term is there anything that can be done to improve your current job so it becomes less of a daily grind?

South_coast

SuperSecretSquirrel said:

Is the flat out refusal to drop to 30 hours a current pressures thing, or a likely forever thing? Could that request while regularly working overtime be causing some mixed messages?

I wondered that as well

Suffolk_lass

I would like to endorse the extra bits you are stuffing into your SIPP. It is the most tax efficient way of saving, but it does presuppose that the current and future Chancellors will all leave the option to take your pension up to ten years before SPA as it is.

I therefore think the other tax efficient savings (ISA [in whatever guise, for those under 40, or FTB, neither of which applies to you, but may to other readers], PBs if you want a punt) they also have a place, especially if your plans are to clear your mortgage and look to be funding the gap between either packing up work altogether, or taking a lower paid job and topping up as needed, prior to drawing down your SIPP, or taking an actuarially reduced DB pension (I think you have an old one, that is quietly frozen and indexating away in the background, from a previous role).

I also think you need to look at cash-accessible savings (PBs, ...maybe; but they only grow if you win [speaking as one of those who has the £17 of bonds bought through my childhood, mostly as single £1 bonds] - we have a bit of a TT pot that stays at £10k but probably doesn't need to - this offers massive flexibility and some bargaining power.

Then there is paying down your mortgage. If you were paying 4% and your savings were increasing by the same margin, I would personally pay lumps off the mortgage, because then when that lump is gone, you are no longer paying 4% on it. Whenever interest rates fell, our payment stayed the same, and with each pay-rise, I asked to pay another £50 or £100 per month as capital repayment, just chipping away, and did not notice the difference. The magic snowball, rolling along at a snail's pace, did eventually gain momentum. My propensity for buying top of the range, nice things (possessions or wines, for instance  ) was only thwarted when I made myself feel poor, by allocating most of the month's money (a feeling I know you experienced post lettuce, without electing to do so).

If you hate your job, you really should move. Don't just look at the initial salary, look at the growth, the organisation structure, and the potential for progression. Your skills are not as niche as you think, you have general skills. Check out Civil Service competency frameworks or whatever key, transferrable skills they all have, and then think of examples you could flesh out - it does not all have to be job - some life examples might work.

Sometimes, for me, just putting in place a bit of Plan B flesh on the bones, was enough to make me feel better

greenbee

You've mentioned a few times doing AI surveys on Prolific. AI skills are highly sought after (and in short supply), so if you have skills/experience in the field, don't limit yourself. 

themadvix

I agree with the others Ed, life is too short to be long-term miserable for the sake of future wealth - no one knows what the future might bring or if you'll get to enjoy the pension when it arrives. You must have loads of transferable skills. Could you do a part-time evening course to make yourself more attractive to employers outside of your niche?

When you read that the average DC pension pot is something ridiculous like £37k, it puts into perspective how well we are all doing in our little corner of the Internet. While you're not where you want to be by retirement yet, you're already a long way there and heck of a lot closer than many of our peers. Being good with money should enable you to have choices, not be stuck in something you hate doing with no way out. You might want to retire early now, but if you found something that you enjoy, you might not mind working a bit longer to make up for not having that DB pension at the level you want it to be.

KajiKita

There’s loads of good advice here which I can’t add to, but I just wanted to add a comment based on my personal experience. The horrendous job, that I’m no longer in, did actually get me (along with factors in my personal life) to a state that meant I found myself wondering about whether there was any point continuing. At all. 

I got that sorted thanks to some counselling, which dialled down the immediate pressure or at least my reaction to it, but … what it didn’t do was resolve any of the fundamental issues of a boss with values who I did not align with, an insane workload and conflicting strategic priorities as well as a big team to manage. It wore me down. I’m still tired now, some 10 months after leaving I can still feel that I am recovering. 

It took me two goes to get the job I have now after being ‘let go’ (with a suitable financial handshake) but now I have a work life balance, a boss who actually listens to and respects me and enough money, even if I’m not on the higher salary that I was before.

I’m 10 years older than you at 54 and I can tell you that it only gets harder to sustain the energy to do what you are doing atm in your job in a non-supportive atmosphere. You’ve already had it almost break you once. I worry it might happen again. Each time these things do get to the point of overwhelming us, even after nominally recovering, we are left with just a bit more ‘psychic shrapnel’ (not quite sure how else to describe it 😉) and eventually you can’t get up again. 

I’m not saying this to frighten you, but only to encourage you to seriously and proactively consider other options than just enduring …

Someone a few posts ago, suggested a jobs coach. I think that would be a really good investment for you. It would help you think outside of your context-centred self perception of your role and skills and help you network in a different way to now, opening up different opportunities. This wouldn’t happen quickly but would be worth the effort. After all you probably have at least another 15 to 20 years of work ahead of you. Do you really want to be doing what you are doing and feeling how you are for that much longer? 

Well done if you’ve read all of this! 😉 Suffice it to say, you are well liked and respected here, we will be your biggest cheerleaders in making this change and will support you however we can (if you decide to go for it) … 😊

KK

greent

I'll add a bit in here, too. Mr gt's last job had a good salary/ car allowance/ share scheme/ bonuses/ pension, meaning we saved half of his salary and almost all of mine each month as a minimum, and didn't exactly scrimp and save to do that. However, there were issues with his LM/ role/ the company and he ended up being signed off for over 3 months. He'd had MH issues before, quite seriously at times. He ended up leaving the role with nothing to go to - and 2 years down the line has still not found another role. Because of our savings we are OK. He is much better than he was, although still not 100%. He's coming around to the idea of being retired (we're both 55 and could take our DB pensions from banking from 50, but haven’t) 

I truly don't think he'd still be here if he hadn't left that job. I checked with him whether (on the basis he hasn't had a job for basically 2 years) he still thinks he made the right decision to go - and he does.

Now I just need him to be a fully functioning house husband and it will be ok (I still far too often come home from work and cook, clean etc)

We are obviously down a lot of cash with him not working for 22/23 months- both in terms of using some savings each month and in terms of not having his lovely salary/ bonuses etc coming in and increasing our savings each month. Thankfully, our mortgage was paid off 10 years ago, and we did save a good % of take home. I'm debating whether he should start taking his bank pension this year, or wait some more. I need him to fully commit to being retired first, otherwise he'll be hot with way too much tax if he did get something else.

I appreciate we are in a different life stage to you (although still have one at school and one at uni and another still living at home) but life is OK here - and he is still here 😊

South_coast

KajiKita said:

Each time these things do get to the point of overwhelming us, even after nominally recovering, we are left with just a bit more ‘psychic shrapnel’ (not quite sure how else to describe it 😉) and eventually you can’t get up again. 

I think I've linked to this before (although maybe not on Ed's diary 🤔), but you've definitely just reminded me of this: https://affordanything.com/what-most-people-dont-know-about-pavlovs-dogs/

KajiKita

South_coast said:

KajiKita said:

Each time these things do get to the point of overwhelming us, even after nominally recovering, we are left with just a bit more ‘psychic shrapnel’ (not quite sure how else to describe it 😉) and eventually you can’t get up again. 

I think I've linked to this before (although maybe not on Ed's diary 🤔), but you've definitely just reminded me of this: https://affordanything.com/what-most-people-dont-know-about-pavlovs-dogs/

Wow … that was fascinating and describes my experience pretty closely. Thank you for sharing. 

KK 

Watty1

that was a fascinating link.