I've discovered my neighbours huge debts

Sea_Shell

How are you able to handle these things, under what authority?

Has she granted you power of attorney, or is she passing the phone over to you once she's through to her providers and passed their security etc.?

Savedotmoney

Sea_Shell said:

How are you able to handle these things, under what authority?

Has she granted you power of attorney, or is she passing the phone over to you once she's through to her providers and passed their security etc.?

Passing the phone over.

Don’t even start to play that card.

Savedotmoney

I think the plan so far… hold letters to all debtors and potentially use breathing space, calculated payment amounts and try to negotiate a payment plan with them all based on available money.

we have a ref from the national debt line to give to Scottish power to hopefully use hardship fund to pay some of the remaining balance with them.

Jami74

Do you already know her family? If not, they might be quite shocked that a neighbour is so involved in her finances. It might be better to encourage her to speak to them. 

Savedotmoney

Jami74 said:

Do you already know her family? If not, they might be quite shocked that a neighbour is so involved in her finances. It might be better to encourage her to speak to them. 

I’m trying my best to encourage her to talk to her Son but she’s afraid of his response. I have already said I can’t have the burden of all of the responsibility even though I’m happy to help with the process of sorting it out. 

I think this is a lifetime of issues come to a head. I’m asking for breathing space from the CC for the next few months to get things in order and I will then speak to her Son, come to an agreement with finances and make offers to the companies. Pay off debt where she can, ensuring utilities are paid and food can be put on the table. 

kimwp

I think you should be encouraging her to talk to stepchange or one of the other debt charities rather than making financial decisions for her. You appear to be doing this with the best of intentions, but I think you are on shaky ground given that it is not your profession.

sammyjammy

She is 70 years old and just finished work from what you say, its lovely that you are helping her but you appear to be fixing things for her rather than trying to help her see it for herself, she's not a child there is no reason why her son needs to know what is going on.

Jami74

Savedotmoney said:

Jami74 said:

Do you already know her family? If not, they might be quite shocked that a neighbour is so involved in her finances. It might be better to encourage her to speak to them. 

I’m trying my best to encourage her to talk to her Son but she’s afraid of his response. I have already said I can’t have the burden of all of the responsibility even though I’m happy to help with the process of sorting it out. 

I think this is a lifetime of issues come to a head. I’m asking for breathing space from the CC for the next few months to get things in order and I will then speak to her Son, come to an agreement with finances and make offers to the companies. Pay off debt where she can, ensuring utilities are paid and food can be put on the table. 

When the son finds out your involvement in his Mums finances he might thank you, or he might call the police.

You are not just providing advice and supporting her, you are taking control (you cancelled her credit card and direct debits, you're negotiating payments on her behalf). If you think she is unable to manage her finances it would be a good idea to speak to someone at social services, even if it's just to let them know you are helping her, they are likely to get involved at some point anyway if her son or anyone else expresses concerns. 

I am not saying your intentions are bad or wrong, only that you need to protect yourself. We live in a suspicious society "The nice man next door is helping me with my money" coming from the mouth of an older lady living alone could invoke all sorts of knee jerk reactions.

BSideBaby

As a carer I find this very concerning. If I discovered a neighbour had become this involved in a client's finances I'd be duty bound to report it to my seniors. I realise you're trying to help your neighbour but financial abuse is a very real problem and you're putting yourself at risk of accusations. 

Unless you've been granted power of attorney you would be well advised to give your neighbour StepChange's details so she can sort this out with their help. It is not for you to decide if her family should be involved or not.

Sea_Shell

Savedotmoney said:

Sea_Shell said:

How are you able to handle these things, under what authority?

Has she granted you power of attorney, or is she passing the phone over to you once she's through to her providers and passed their security etc.?

Passing the phone over.

Don’t even start to play that card.

Looks like others are "playing that card".

Seriously, you need to be very careful, and document everything, if you're going to continue.