Best way to deal with a micromanaging boss

[Deleted User]

So it's just occurred to me just how much of a micromanager my boss is. I do administration work in reception.
She tells me to answer e-mails, fair enough, but she tells me the order in which to answer them. She also tells me what to write in some e-mails. 
There are two windows, she sits at the one nearest the entrance and can see who enters the building before me. She barks out orders telling me for example to tell someone that a dog is not allowed in. She could do this herself. 
She gets the cleaners to sign through a long checklist of tidying the rooms, including the time the room was cleaned, and the same with the toilets
She tells me what to say on the phone when we have sales calls. 
I have been doing this job for a few years and I know what I am doing. She has been my boss the whole time and I've only just realised this is micromanagement. 
She does like to be in control
I used to make promotional videos in power point, my boss now does this, when I used to do them she used to tell me "don't spend all day on it" but now she spends all day on them. There was nothing wrong with what I used to produce 
Sometimes I am at the window answering a query from someone and before I even have chance to think or answer, she gives the answer in the background even though I would have said the same thing to the customer 
Sometimes I am fearful of what to say to the customer in case I say the wrong this and then I get nagged at.
The cleaners have also mentioned micromanagement to me.
Everything must go through my manager, even for new bookings, it must be ran past her first, which is dificult when she is not here. It is not like I am not trustworthy! 

How do I stop this nonsense please, I have never been in this situation before 

[Deleted User]

Talk to her about it, how you would like to work, how she wants you to work and agree the guidelines.

yksi

The first thing is to have an honest, critical think about your work performance (and any performance reviews) and decide whether she has a "reason" for this - for example because you've made multiple mistakes. For now, I am going to assume that you haven't, and that your performance is quite ok.

Next, you need to address why she might be doing this. Is she just a poor manager? The thing with the dog (and similar stuff), whose JOB is it? If it's your role, it isn't unreasonable to think that you should do it. If it's a shared role, and she still barks at you to do it, then she's being unreasonable. With the emails, if she knows things about particular emails that you don't know (like, she knows the client) it's reasonable for her to say: John gets very anxious so please deal with him first. It wouldn't be reasonable if you already know that "people with washing machines full of water need to be answered first".

What you need to do is pick a calm moment, when she isn't busy micromanaging, and ask her for a few minutes of her time. Ask if she has concerns about your work, since you've noticed that she is often giving instructions on things that you feel comfortable with. Do it like this: "I've noticed that you often tell me which emails to prioritise. Have I been getting the priorities wrong, or have I given you any reason to think that I need guidance on this, because if so I'd like a chance to get that right." Hopefully she can give you a reason that she is stepping in on this. But if she can't give you any reason for continually treading on your turf, you need to say, "How would you feel about leaving me to prioritise them for a while and seeing how that goes? It would free you up for other things and I'm sure you would appreciate that. It's important for me to grow in my role and that's why I wanted this job. Could you give me the space to try to deal with those for a while and then I'll check in with you later?"

Conquer one mountain at a time. Once she can "let go" of your email management, try the same conversation about her stepping all over your customer service (noting that it will help you to look professional if you're able to handle it solo).

And let us know how it goes!

ryan7

I honestly don't think you can sit down with a MANAGER and give them that sort of critique. They're not answerable to you but only their line manager. 
Micromanagement gets a bad rep because in general terms, subordinates have a lack of freedom. The way your post reads (to me), is that you were content to work with that pressure but now you've recognised it as micromanagement that you now have an issue with it.
There are good points to micromanagement, some of which you've already highlighted.
Get on with it or move on. 

TBagpuss

I think YKSI is right, have a conversation with her - start our by asking if she has noticed any issues or anything that she is concerned about which you need to improve on (and be prepared to listen without getting defensive if she says yes!) 

Then move on to saying that you asked because you've noticed that she is in the habit of telling you which to priorities which suggests that she isn't confident that you know, so you'd like to reassure her that you are able to to it, but also that of course if she wants to provide some general directions (e.g. always prioritise emails where someone is saying their house is on fire / they are threatening to take their business elsewhere) 

In the moment, you could of course try responding with a "Yes, I know" when she tells you which to prioritise or even "Name, I'm already dealing with the mails in that way - what made you think I needed to be reminded? " 

You can also say that you've noticed that she will tell you what o say when you are speaking to a client, and ask that she not do so - frame it as it potentially creating problems as it gives the customer the impression that you may not know the answers, which could result in them having less confidence in the company, and also it's distracting - perhaps say that of course you will refer to her if you are ever unsure of what to tell a customer or if you don't know the answer to a query, but ask that she not interrupt you when you are speaking with a client as it looks less professional to clients. 

Ignore her micromanagement on things which don't affect you - if she wants to do very detailed lists for the  clearer that 's nothing to do with you, so ignore it. 

I think things like the powerpoint presentations you need to let go - how long she spends on them is none of your business. IF she asks you to do them again then address it then, if she is expecting you to do them in an unrealistic amount of time. 

Unfortunately, I think that unless someone senior to her notices the situation and decides to intervene, she's unlikely to change so I think your best bet is to decide whether you can live with it (with internal eye-rolls ) and if not, start looking around for other options . How big is the company? Is an internal move to work with a  different manager an option? 

ryan7

Bagpus and YKSI have articulated a very lovely scenario whereby you are viewed as the 'bigger person' with a morale compass. 

What you have to take into consideration is, is this manager an A-hole? From my experience of micromanagement, they don't give a sh*t about your feelings.
If they want something done specifically you will need to fall in line or be prepared to be answerable for not.

As for someone above noticing their behaviour, if the manager's team and department are delivering results - which I suspect they are then no-one will bat an eyelid at how they achieved it. 

MalMonroe

Reading your post does make me wonder what your manager's actual job is? How on earth does she manage to get on with her own job if she's watching you all the time? Or is it her job to simply control you? If the latter is the case, there's obviously one employee too many.

I don't think it's a bad idea to ask if you can have a word with her, somewhere away from the area you both work in, like a proper, structured meeting. To the meeting, you should take a couple of copies of your Job Description (you should have a job description) and notes similar to the points you have made in your post. It might also be a good idea to take some notes at the meeting. If at all possible, you should also invite a staff member more senior to her, so that they have some idea of what's going on. And if you have an HR department, a representative from there would not go amiss. If I were senior to your boss, I'd have to have a conversation with her anyway. Such as, what is in her job description, exactly?

You could then point out to these managers that you have been doing the job for a number of years, feel quite competent and capable enough to do it without constant supervision and wonder why your line manager feels it is essential for her to keep telling you how to do it without giving you any opportunity to do so independently.

She obviously has her own problems but it would be better if she could stop doing this. It's more than micromanagement, it's bullying in the workplace and it's not on. 

It's worth standing up for yourself because you do spend quite a bit of time at work and it seems to me that you could actually enjoy your job, if you were allowed to get on with it without this harassment.

Have a read of this Acas page : https://www.acas.org.uk/if-youre-treated-unfairly-at-work

Thrugelmir

Do you have an HR department? Are there any other areas of the organisation where you could work? 

kimwp

Definitely worth talking to her about- feedback should go both ways. 

Consider approaching it from an angle of what does she need and what do you need and how can you best meet those needs. For example, if she has worries about you not prioritising, come up with a priority list to follow. If she needs to know what's going on, drill down to how frequently she needs an update. Likewise if you need to feel trusted (which I think is reasonable), she needs to let you get on with the job and not jump in with the answer before you do. There's good advice around about difficult conversations, worth having a read and going in with a "how can we get to a better place" approach.
 

Thrugelmir

kimwp said:

Definitely worth talking to her about- feedback should go both ways. 


 

Ideally with a 3rd party to mediate. Micro managers don't take criticism very well.