Sexless marriage

spikemilley
spikemilley Posts: 1 Newbie
I can’t believe how shattering to my self esteem our sexless relationship is it came from nowhere it’s been 5 years now . You can’t underestimate the damage it does 

Comments

  • Grumpy_chap
    Grumpy_chap Posts: 17,700 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    This might be better in the relationships forum.
  • k3lvc
    k3lvc Posts: 4,174 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper
    This might be better in the relationships forum.
    Or probably in another forum entirely ;)
  • CookieMonster
    CookieMonster Posts: 220 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 100 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited 7 June 2021 at 12:47PM
    I can’t believe how shattering to my self esteem our sexless relationship is it came from nowhere it’s been 5 years now . You can’t underestimate the damage it does 
    Then leave.
    I know that may be easier said than done.
    I started out with nothing and I still got most of it left. Tom Waits
  • sassyblue
    sassyblue Posts: 3,793 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    I can’t believe how shattering to my self esteem our sexless relationship is it came from nowhere it’s been 5 years now . You can’t underestimate the damage it does 
    Then leave.
    I know that may be easier said than done.
    ^^^ THIS

    very difficult I know but you have the rest of your life to live, it’s not fair to live like you are. 

    What are your other half's reasons? I'm not asking you to tell us but are they enjoying relations elsewhere do you know? 


    Happy moneysaving all.
  • izawa
    izawa Posts: 161 Forumite
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    If you aren't happy, tell partner " Hey buddy, look you gottta start doing." If reponse is A) Yes - all good B) You live with or get a divo. Dont overthink. 
    I am relationship expert. Don't feel shy, say hello.
  • Gycraig
    Gycraig Posts: 318 Forumite
    Fifth Anniversary 100 Posts Name Dropper
    5 years is honestly insanity, is it a medical condition, do they just not want sex, are they not attracted to you ?. 

    Unless it’s a medical condition I’d be leaving, 5 years and not having sex sounds like the relationship is over 
  • JGB1955
    JGB1955 Posts: 3,790 Forumite
    Sixth Anniversary 1,000 Posts Name Dropper
    I can’t believe how shattering to my self esteem our sexless relationship is it came from nowhere it’s been 5 years now . You can’t underestimate the damage it does 
    I'm guessing you're several decades younger than us.  Married 43 years... last had sex more than 10 years ago.  I'm not bothered.  It really isn't important to me.  If it's important to my OH, he can go and find it somewhere else.... There are far more important issues to deal with as you get older.
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  • Naomim
    Naomim Posts: 3,117 Forumite
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    Have you spoken to your partner?

    From a females point of view, starting to go through the change, being peri-menopausal, my libido has completely nose dived. However, MrM and I managed to talk and discuss where we were coming from and took it from there. Hopefully we've found a happy medium.

    I hope you find some resolution. 
    Credit Cards NOV 2019 £33,220.42 Sept 2023 £19,951.00 Tilly Tidy 20223/COLOR] Sept £43.71 Here's my diary: A Ditherer's Diary Again
  • gozaimasu
    gozaimasu Posts: 860 Forumite
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    Men and women are very badly designed. If indeed, they were ever "designed" at all.
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