How to ask my lodger to leave without telling him the truth

GDB2222

Deleted_User said:

I think it's very fair and constructive to say it's not working out for you and you are frequently disturbed by him going to bed so late. You don't need to construct a lie. It is very understandable for someone who works 'normal' hours to have a lodger on the same schedule so (in my opinion) you'd be completely justified in telling the truth in a way that isn't going to get his back up. It also means that he's mindful of this over the next month and possibly the next place he goes to. 

Absolutely agree. You don't need to say that he's rude and impolite. Just concentrate on the late hours.

Of course, he may say that he'll start going to bed much earlier, but just say you thought about it carefully and your mind is made up. No reflection on him.

By the way, if you are in London, you may find it harder than you expect to find a replacement lodger. 

NaughtiusMaximus

GDB2222 said:

Deleted_User said:

I think it's very fair and constructive to say it's not working out for you and you are frequently disturbed by him going to bed so late. You don't need to construct a lie. It is very understandable for someone who works 'normal' hours to have a lodger on the same schedule so (in my opinion) you'd be completely justified in telling the truth in a way that isn't going to get his back up. It also means that he's mindful of this over the next month and possibly the next place he goes to. 

Absolutely agree. You don't need to say that he's rude and impolite. Just concentrate on the late hours.

Of course, he may say that he'll start going to bed much earlier, but just say you thought about it carefully and your mind is made up. No reflection on him.

By the way, if you are in London, you may find it harder than you expect to find a replacement lodger. 

At risk of heading off topic, why do you say that?


I'd have thought there would be more demand in London than elsewhere in the country due to the much higher cost of a 'normal' rental.

[Deleted User]

NaughtiusMaximus said:

GDB2222 said:

Deleted_User said:

I think it's very fair and constructive to say it's not working out for you and you are frequently disturbed by him going to bed so late. You don't need to construct a lie. It is very understandable for someone who works 'normal' hours to have a lodger on the same schedule so (in my opinion) you'd be completely justified in telling the truth in a way that isn't going to get his back up. It also means that he's mindful of this over the next month and possibly the next place he goes to. 

Absolutely agree. You don't need to say that he's rude and impolite. Just concentrate on the late hours.

Of course, he may say that he'll start going to bed much earlier, but just say you thought about it carefully and your mind is made up. No reflection on him.

By the way, if you are in London, you may find it harder than you expect to find a replacement lodger. 

At risk of heading off topic, why do you say that?


I'd have thought there would be more demand in London than elsewhere in the country due to the much higher cost of a 'normal' rental.

Here's my guess - because there is just too much competition from existing house-shares looking for replacement flatmates.

It used to be competitive/difficult to get offered the room in the best houseshares (cool people, property, location, etc). Now they're desperate to fill the rooms, so there won't be so many gruelling interviews/character appraisals in front of a panel of prospective housemates.

Most young people would rather live with housemates than be a lodger because they have more security of tenure and there's not the power imbalance (and often age and money difference) that's found in a lodging setup.  Also it's just more fun!

You don't really see a difference in price between renting a room on a joint tenant or room only basis, versus renting a room as a lodger.  If there's a slight difference it's that lodgers pay an amount inclusive of bills so maybe it can be a bit cheaper, but not by much.

Also it must be having an impact that people aren't moving to London from abroad in big numbers. So the pool of people looking is still reduced.  Universities aren't fully back yet, people aren't arriving here for internships or new jobs, etc.

theartfullodger

teachfast said:

Don't be ridiculous. There is nothing wrong with discovering you can't live under the same roof as someone.

Indeed:  It's usually called "Marriage".

Artful: Now on 3rd successful marriage.

GDB2222

Well, we have had a two bedroom flat available to rent without much interest for a couple of weeks.

Friends, with a house with multiple small flats, report that they have accepted 15% rent reductions. They had a void for several months. 

I think there's a shortage of tenants in London at the moment. It's not dramatic, but it's important to be competitive on price.

GDB2222

theartfullodger said:

teachfast said:

Don't be ridiculous. There is nothing wrong with discovering you can't live under the same roof as someone.

Indeed:  It's usually called "Marriage".

Artful: Now on 3rd successful marriage.

Same marriage here for 41 years. Still madly in lust. What am I (or she) doing right?