Boyfriend moving into my flat!

Megan123456

clueless_but_curious said:

This must be a wind up

Oh no why?! I'm very open to viewpoints - if this is way off please tell me!

getmore4less

This is a fairly common topic on here, arrangements for cohabitation.

More often after the event when it has gone wrong than before the event to get ideas.

That's when they find out they did not talk about it or did talk about it but rushed into what looked like a good way but turned out not .

Even those that have solicitors draw up deeds of trust have presented some not so clever splits.

fewcloudy

Megan123456 said:

clueless_but_curious said:

This must be a wind up

Oh no why?! I'm very open to viewpoints - if this is way off please tell me!

@Megan123456
I sometimes wonder if the range of answers given on here to these types of questions are 'generational'🤷‍♂️
My daughters (in their mid 20's) would deal with this like you are, and I would be pleased they were.
But many of my friends/family who are my age and upwards (55) may well express surprise that it's even an issue, and suggest it doesn't bode well for the future of the relationship.
At least you get a range of responses on here. Maybe chop off the extreme views at either end of the spectrum, and you'll do alright I reckon

ukri

OP, I don’t have much to add besides my opinion that the split described in your initial post seems fair to me.

Besides that, I think it’s really commendable that you and your boyfriend are this comfortable discussing money issues. The general taboo around these topics often leads to issues down the line. 

strike212

OP, are you the same user who was previously writing threads asking if you could get your boyfriend to pay half the solicitors fees & furniture you had bought etc. if he was to move into the place you had decided to buy before meeting/moving in together? Sounds like really similar circumstances  

Also, I agree with your first post on the split of costs, however from experience I'd make it that he was paying you as if it were 'lodgings' for now (maybe 6 months?) rather than specifying it's half the interest in case of any claim down the line then formalise everything when you decide to buy together/change the mortgage to joint.  

Megan123456

strike212 said:

OP, are you the same user who was previously writing threads asking if you could get your boyfriend to pay half the solicitors fees & furniture you had bought etc. if he was to move into the place you had decided to buy before meeting/moving in together? Sounds like really similar circumstances  

Also, I agree with your first post on the split of costs, however from experience I'd make it that he was paying you as if it were 'lodgings' for now (maybe 6 months?) rather than specifying it's half the interest in case of any claim down the line then formalise everything when you decide to buy together/change the mortgage to joint.  

Hi, no, I already own the flat! We aren't buying together.

Good advice thank you, will do that!

yllop1101

My boyfriend lives in my flat that I own, and I soon will be buying a house which we will live in. He earns a bit more than me, but isn't that fussed about owning and we were not quite ready to buy together. 
He was renting somewhere for just over £1000 per month, and has moved in with me and is now paying £500 per month. Yes this is just under half of my total mortgage plus bills, however in his eyes he is 'saving' £500 per month on market rate, as am I, so we see it as fair. I completely trust that he wouldn't try to come after me for any beneficial interest in the property, as he genuinely believes we have a fair arrangement. If he was begrudgingly paying, I would be more concerned. 
As you've highlighted, it's important in a relationship for things to feel fair, rather than 1 feel like they're being taken advantage of, or something being so comfortable that it encourages oversight of any potential issues, should they arise. 

I know people will disagree with our approach, but, it works for us.