My mum's aunt very kindly sends me a cheque every Christmas. This year, I tried to deposit it via my banking app, but was told the date wasn't legible and to contact her to ask for another cheque or a bank transfer. I feel a bit awkward telling her this - should I just wait and see if she notices I haven't cashed it?
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Money Moral Dilemma: Should I tell my great aunt I couldn't cash her cheque?
MSE_Kelvin
Posts: 450 MSE Staff
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Comments
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Tell her. She may have had her account cleaned out by that Prince from Nigeria...I started out with nothing and I still got most of it left. Tom Waits1
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She might be watching her account, keeping the money aside, so I would want her to know in case she thinks you're being ungrateful. I'd probably not want to tell her myself - it would feel a bit rude even though it really isn't! Does your mum talk to her regularly? If she does, I'd ask her to just mention that there was a problem with the cheque so the bank wouldn't pay it but not to worry about a new one, perhaps suggest she treats herself instead. You'll probably find she sends you a new one anyway but you won't need to feel awkward like you've asked for it.6
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Easiest way is to pretend the cheque had a nasty accident and tell her it won't be cashed. The next bit is up to the great aunt to decide.0
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Of course you should tell her. Nothing to be embarrassed about - just say the date wasn't clear enough for the bank - ie it's the bank's fault. It was given in good faith so be honest. It's not rude - it would be rude not to. If you don't say then what about next year and the next etc etc.2
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I would try paying in at a physical branch first (so 20th century)!11
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I would also go to a branch or even deposit it via cash machine.8
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Tell her. Then she can write another cheque. She may not realise there is a problem.1
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I was that Aunt a couple of years ago - forgot to sign the darn thing !!
Fortunately my niece told me, as yes, I would have noticed it not being cashed., and then I would have been the embarrassed one wondering how to ask.
Tell her, definitely.
She's now happy with Amazon vouchers, thank goodness.6 -
This is a "social niceties dilemma", not really financial or moral...
You should definitely let her know. Personally, if I didn't speak to this relative often, I would feel mercenary phoning and asking for a new cheque. So I would write a letter asking how she is, sharing any news, and mentioning the cheque in passing. I would also tell her not to worry about the money although I was grateful for her generosity. She's likely to send a new cheque regardless.1 -
Keep it for an emergency and/or when you next speak to her mention the downsides to modern tech as an aside0
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