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Money Moral Dilemma: Should I tell my great aunt I couldn't cash her cheque?

MSE_Kelvin
MSE_Kelvin Posts: 450 MSE Staff
Eighth Anniversary 10 Posts Photogenic Name Dropper
This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...

My mum's aunt very kindly sends me a cheque every Christmas. This year, I tried to deposit it via my banking app, but was told the date wasn't legible and to contact her to ask for another cheque or a bank transfer. I feel a bit awkward telling her this - should I just wait and see if she notices I haven't cashed it?

Unfortunately the MSE team can't always answer money moral dilemma questions as contributions are often emailed in or suggested in person. They are intended to be a point of debate and discussed at face value.

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Comments

  • Tell her. She may have had her account cleaned out by that Prince from Nigeria...
    I started out with nothing and I still got most of it left. Tom Waits
  • CRANKY40
    CRANKY40 Posts: 5,948 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Debt-free and Proud! Name Dropper
    Easiest way is to pretend the cheque had a nasty accident and tell her it won't be cashed. The next bit is up to the great aunt to decide.
  • anita116
    anita116 Posts: 51 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    Of course you should tell her.   Nothing to be embarrassed about - just say the date wasn't clear enough for the bank - ie it's the bank's fault.   It was given in good faith so be honest.   It's not rude - it would be rude not to.   If you don't say then what about next year and the next etc etc.
  • REJP
    REJP Posts: 325 Forumite
    Sixth Anniversary 100 Posts Name Dropper
    Tell her.  Then she can write another cheque.  She may not realise there is a problem.
  • mrpunk50
    mrpunk50 Posts: 35 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10 Posts Combo Breaker
    This is a "social niceties dilemma", not really financial or moral...
    You should definitely let her know. Personally, if I didn't speak to this relative often, I would feel mercenary phoning and asking for a new cheque. So I would write a letter asking how she is, sharing any news, and mentioning the cheque in passing. I would also tell her not to worry about the money although I was grateful for her generosity. She's likely to send a new cheque regardless. 
  • Keep it for an emergency and/or when you next speak to her mention the downsides to modern tech as an aside
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