Getting shot of the mortgage sooner than 2049!

joedenise

Good to see you back @Bluegreen143.  Glad you had a good summer and have sorted out how you're going to organise your finances so that Red is happy too.

Sorry to hear about Red's brother but good that Red is supporting his family.

We really need to update our wills as we have done that for a long time - about 30 years ago and one bit in it says the property can't be sold until our youngest child is 25 - she's now nearly double that age!

Bluegreen143

Glad I’ve prompted some of you to look at your wills too. I’ve been nagging all my friends - I have a few friends who’ve chosen not to get married (don’t believe in it/don’t think it’s feminist) but have children with their partners. That’s a situation where it’s so vital you have all the paperwork in place! 

Our wills are very simple, with no specific bequests. If I die, Red gets everything and vice versa. If we both die, my sister (who also lives within the catchment area for the kids’ school) is our executor and guardian of our children. The money would be used for the children’s upkeep and further/higher education and whatever is left gets split between them at age 25. 

Baileys_Babe

Lovely to see you back @Bluegreen143

Sorry to hear about Red's brother.

Our wills need updating, so thank you for the prompt. We also have plenty of other life admin that we wish to sort out. Me & OH need to get together and make a plan.

Good to see Red wishes to be involved with the household finances and the pair of you are finding ways to make that work.

Bluegreen143

Thanks @Baileys_Babe.

After years of me penny-pinching (by necessity) we are in a phase where we don’t need to do that so much and I think it’s time we prioritise certain things that are important to us.

As our kids are now out from the toddler phase I am feeling like our marriage needs to be top priority, we now have so much more time and energy to give each other and we are feeling much more romantic toward each other again in recent times rather than just partners in parenting! So if we can rejig the finances in a way that empowers Red that is so much more important than me just choosing a way to do them that I find efficient. There’s also not much point saving every penny but neglecting our marriage and then getting divorced over money and being skint again! 

We’ve been on a monthly “out of the house” date in July and August, with a September date planned in in two weeks. Money well spent! Our August date was really fun - we had a daytime date for my birthday, and we did an archery “hunting” experience and went for sushi. So much fun and we now want to get each other bows and archery kit for Christmas 😍

Budget (I get paid tomorrow)

Net pay: £1,851
Child benefit: £159 (Friday)

Bills: £530 (includes putting aside for annual bills)

Savings
Emergency fund: £100 (currently £2,970)
Help to Save: £100 (currently £3,300)
Holidays: £0 (currently £850)
Gifts: £175 (currently £815)
Big house projects: £0 (currently £0)

Spending
Groceries: £350
Petrol: £80
My personal budget: £300

Leaves £375.

Hoping to be able to save £100 of this at the end of the month depending what other expenses come up.

In terms of known spending:

- £22 on the digital copy of Monkey’s school photo
- I think we will want to do some kind of day trip during the September long weekend - but we may go to a National Trust place and use our membership if it’s dry which won’t really cost anything - but if it’s wet we might do the Science Centre.
- Bambi has also outgrown her shoes 🙄 I’ll probably hold off on the winter insulated wellies for both kids til next month, but for now Bambi will need two pairs of trainers (one needs kept at nursery), a pair of boots and she will be devastated at outgrowing her pretty party shoes so will probably get her a pair of those too…

I’m off on a weekend away with my mum and sister on Friday, but the accommodation is paid for already and I have £100 saved up towards it to add to my £300 personal spending budget for this month.

Baileys_Babe

You sound very positive. Recognising the start of a new phase of family life and the positive changes that has on your relationship is wonderful to hear about. 

Does Bambi need party shoes immediately or can it be differed a little while until an occasion arises where they would be required? If you can I would delay as children's feet can grow a size or two virtually overnight.

Bluegreen143

@Baileys_Babe no, but she puts on her party shoes round the house constantly or just wears them to playdates etc.

Red thinks it’s sweet and I have a suspicion that if I don’t get her a pair he will as he’s a bit of a softie 😂 and I’d rather choose them myself, his taste in girls’ clothing is questionable! I can’t let her keep wearing the old pair, her feet are totally squashed now. I only got them a month ago so I hear what you’re saying re them growing quickly!! Thankfully her other shoes she’s had for ages so got good wear out of. 

Since I’m back on here, I wanted to post an up to date statement of finances, mainly so I can refer back later:

INCOME: Approx £4,300

Me: £1,851
Red: £2,300
Child benefit: £159


NEEDS: £2,223

Monthly bills:
Mortgage £530
Council tax £165
Life insurance £50
Energy £180
Internet £24
Car loan £160 (interest free, owed to my mum)
Nursery fund £32 (only childcare cost, pays for snacks and consumables like paint)
TV & music £32 (inc TV license, Netflix and Spotify)

Annual bills (split into 12):
Home ins £8
Amazon prime £8
Car tax £20
Car ins & breakdown £35

Monthly variable:
Groceries/household £600
Petrol etc £175
Kids’ clothes £50
Misc/contingency £200


SAVINGS £825

Emergencies £250
Help to Save £100
Lifetime ISA £50

Holidays £250
Gifts £175

LEFT FOR SPENDING £1,252

My personal - usually £300-350
Red’s personal - usually £400-450

Rest divided between:

Kids’ activities & pocket money 
Family fun & eating out
Home & garden

AND/OR adding more to savings

WORKING HOURS 

There is a question about when I will increase my hours. My manager has already asked me if I’d like to, and is indicating she can be very flexible eg I could use my lunch break to still pick up the kids after school, then putting in a couple of hours with them at home so wouldn’t need extra childcare. 

My thoughts are a no to working regularly after 3pm (though it’s great my manager would be so supportive of me working round the kids) but that I had already planned to definitely move up to five short days a week (30-32.5 hours a week) once Bambi begins school next August. 

However I could potentially do that sooner if we wanted to - as long as I could get the extra day at nursery. I think I would only have to pay for half the day as she doesn’t quite use all her free hours, but I’m not 100% sure. So if I had a significant extra childcare cost I’m not sure if it’s worth it financially. 

However it would potentially be good to get Bambi used to going five days before she starts school next year as she’s said a few times she doesn’t want to go to school because you have to go on Fridays 🙈 so I might leave it for this term but move her to five days in January then hopefully she will feel more positive about school once she’s used that schedule. 

Sunshine_girl2

Just delurking to say would it be worth upping the payment for the car , then when paid off you could start saving for a future one. 

Glad to see you back, always enjoy your diary . 

Baileys_Babe

I can see Bambi will get plenty of wear out of the party shoes whether she attends a party or not 😃

Would your employer consider you only increasing your hours in term time? It would save you needing to find as much childcare in the holidays.

Making enquires about increasing Bambi's nursery hours and related costs would give you the knowledge if this is something that you wish pursue. It also sounds like it could be worth while to ease her transition to school 😆

TallGirl

Great to have you back sorry to hear about Red's brother that is very young so sad. Glad to see you are still having discussions about finances and are on the same page. Your plan sounds great look forward to following.

badmemory

I just wanted to second Cheery's comment about your Power of Attorneys.  They are fairly simple to DIY & are not that expensive.  I think they are still £82 each for 2 each health & financial.  That way you have all bases covered.  Like wills they can be even more important for your unmarried friends.  I can't imagine how it must feel to have a partner lying in a hospital bed & a sibling walking in & saying this is what should happen leaving the partner no say in it.

I do wish people would remember that marriage is about more than someone telling someone else what to do.  They should be protecting their children for the future.  I do understand the whole thing but I remember my mother saying (she'd be 98 now) that if she was starting now she wouldn't get married unless she had children - they were harder to avoid back just post war.