Spousal Maintenance - Non Working Wife

MattMattMattUK

dontknowwhattodonext said:

I have spoken to a solictor and was told like be 50% of salar and my pension, as she is unlikley to get a job, also he raised the fact wiith no income how would she be able to rent a property.

If that is actually what your solicitor told you then you need a competent solicitor. There is no way, with no children any divorce court would award your wife 50% of your salary, it is incredibly unlikely they would award her any of your future earnings. She would likely get 50% the total pension assets, so hers would factor into that, as well as half the marital assets. 

She might not be likely to get a well paid job, but she can certainly get a job in time. She would also be entitled to benefits, which would cover the cost of renting somewhere to live.

Mojisola

burlingtonfl6 said:

pollypenny said:

If she's chosen a 1950s housewife style of living she's only got herself to blame. 

I can never understand why some women look down on other women for choosing this direction in life. 

I don't look down on women who make this choice but I do think it's unwise. Life can change through death or long term sickness of a partner or divorce.
To leave yourself so vulnerable and unable to cope as an independent adult is an odd decision. 

Pollycat

Mojisola said:

burlingtonfl6 said:

pollypenny said:

If she's chosen a 1950s housewife style of living she's only got herself to blame. 

I can never understand why some women look down on other women for choosing this direction in life. 

I don't look down on women who make this choice but I do think it's unwise. Life can change through death or long term sickness of a partner or divorce.
To leave yourself so vulnerable and unable to cope as an independent adult is an odd decision. 

That's probably why pollypenny referred to it as a '1950s housewife style of living.

When I was in my early teens (mid 1960s), it was the norm for women to stop working after marriage. My Aunt who is 10 years older than me - born in 1942 - has never worked after getting married.

And very common for women to not return to work after having children.

I didn't see it that pollypenny was looking down on the OP's wife.

Silvertabby said:

A recently divorced neighbour (in her 50s) hasn't worked since she had her first child.  She was awarded 2 years of spousal maintenance, specifically to give her time to re-train and find a job.  

Sad that if the OP had acted 9 years ago when he posted that his marriage was in trouble and he had met someone else, both could have moved on and it may have been somewhat easier for his wife aged under 50 at the time. Not to mention the state of unemployment right now.

Mojisola

Pollycat said:

burlingtonfl6 said:

pollypenny said:

If she's chosen a 1950s housewife style of living she's only got herself to blame. 

I can never understand why some women look down on other women for choosing this direction in life. 

That's probably why pollypenny referred to it as a '1950s housewife style of living.

I didn't see it that pollypenny was looking down on the OP's wife.

pollypenny didn't - burlington made the comment.

We're about the same age and, among our family and friends, some women of the previous generation were like your aunt but many worked part-time while the children were small and went back to work full-time after the children grew up.  They had all done some kind of work during the war and could see the benefits of working.

My mother knew women who had been left penniless after a lifetime of housekeeping and child-rearing after their husbands died or left the marriage and she valued some independence.  Her mother had always brought money into the family although through working from home.

I loved being at home while our children were small and think child-rearing is hugely undervalued by society but I always managed to be active in our business and contribute financially to the household.

If a couple do decide that one of them should stay home and manage the household, they should also consider sharing the financial assets so that they both have savings and pensions.  The stay at home partner should also keep updating skills so that there will be opportunities other than minimum wage jobs should they ever need to return to the workforce.

AskAsk

MattMattMattUK said:

dontknowwhattodonext said:

I have spoken to a solictor and was told like be 50% of salar and my pension, as she is unlikley to get a job, also he raised the fact wiith no income how would she be able to rent a property.

If that is actually what your solicitor told you then you need a competent solicitor. There is no way, with no children any divorce court would award your wife 50% of your salary, it is incredibly unlikely they would award her any of your future earnings. She would likely get 50% the total pension assets, so hers would factor into that, as well as half the marital assets. 

She might not be likely to get a well paid job, but she can certainly get a job in time. She would also be entitled to benefits, which would cover the cost of renting somewhere to live.

this.  OP - i think you should look for a second opinion from another solicitor.  unless there is something that you have withheld from us, which would justify your wife being entitled to 50% of your future earnings.  from the information that you have disclosed this is not the legal position, and so for a solicitor to advise you that this is so, tells me you are not giving us the full story.

Pollycat

Mojisola said:

Pollycat said:

burlingtonfl6 said:

pollypenny said:

If she's chosen a 1950s housewife style of living she's only got herself to blame. 

I can never understand why some women look down on other women for choosing this direction in life. 

That's probably why pollypenny referred to it as a '1950s housewife style of living.

I didn't see it that pollypenny was looking down on the OP's wife.

pollypenny didn't - burlington made the comment.

We're about the same age and, among our family and friends, some women of the previous generation were like your aunt but many worked part-time while the children were small and went back to work full-time after the children grew up.  They had all done some kind of work during the war and could see the benefits of working.

My mother knew women who had been left penniless after a lifetime of housekeeping and child-rearing after their husbands died or left the marriage and she valued some independence.  Her mother had always brought money into the family although through working from home.

I loved being at home while our children were small and think child-rearing is hugely undervalued by society but I always managed to be active in our business and contribute financially to the household.

If a couple do decide that one of them should stay home and manage the household, they should also consider sharing the financial assets so that they both have savings and pensions.  The stay at home partner should also keep updating skills so that there will be opportunities other than minimum wage jobs should they ever need to return to the workforce.

I agree burlington made the comment, but the comment about looking down on women was directed at pollypenny as burlington quoted pollypenny's post.

I think it's up to each person to make the decision that suits them (as a family) best.

I wouldn't look down on anyone for their choice.

Mojisola

Pollycat said:

I think it's up to each person to make the decision that suits them (as a family) best.

I wouldn't look down on anyone for their choice.

We are in agreement.

MEM62

dontknowwhattodonext said:

Wife has suggested £1,245 per month 

If I was in your shoes I would suggest to your ex that she needs to secure employment.  Why should you pay for her lifestyle choices?  In fact, I find the very thought of paying her to sit and do nothing offensive.  

Ganga

Would you not be entitled to half her small private pension?