Forget that I ever existed

Fighter1986

ushjr said:

I'm slightly older than millennials but I have my own theories.

As far back as I can remember my understanding was that jobs weren't supposed to be fun, they were what you did for money. Even the jobs that required degrees weren't supposed to be fun, they were just supposed to pay more money.

Then at some point that all changed. Everyone was encouraged to go to university and a job was no longer described as a way of making money. It was now a career full of exciting opportunities and challenges.

Once people graduated, you first have those who never managed to find a graduate job and probably never will. They'll be unhappy that they're working at Burger King despite having a degree.

Then you have those who did manage to get a graduate job. Maybe they had to do a masters too, maybe they did unpaid internships. Then after several assessment centres full of interviews, role plays and tests they final get offered a graduate job. They have a fancy job title and the duties of the job sound quite technical, but it quickly becomes apparent the job is nothing more than glorified data entry. It also barely pays any more than a Data Entry Clerk too. 

After a year or 2 they search for something more worthwhile and land a job somewhere where everyone's passionate and excited by their work. But once again it's nothing but glorified data entry. It also becomes apparent the 'skills' they acquire are actually pretty useless in the real world.

A few years later their friend from school who decided to leave at 16 to become a Bricklayer is earning twice as much money and he is currently building his own home. They realise that Bricklayers, Electricians, Plumbers etc will always be in demand but their 'skills' will probably be replaced by a computer one day.

I've never been given the expectation to be happy at work.

I have never expected for my "emotional needs" to be catered for by my peers, collaegues, or bosses. That's entirely my responsibility.

I do, however, carry myself through life with a base level of what I will accept in terms of respect. I understand my duties to my peers, and I ensure I deliver what is reasonably expected of me. I treat others with respect and courtesy, I don't suffer fools gladly.

I will put in what's required to acheive the task at hand within reasonable limits based on my pay and contracted hours of employment. I expect others to do the same.

There are firms I've worked for who don't meet my standards in terms of providing me with an appropriate level of respect or appropriate tools with which to do my job (Capita) and therefore my employment with them was short lived. I would never complain about the way an employer goes about its business or how it treats its staff. If the conditions are bad, the payrises non existant or menial, or any other such condition about the employment is clearly sub-par to the point I do not wish to be part of it, I ensure that a better offer is avable to me, and I part company. 

On the other hand, if I can see I'm on to a good egg, I'll stick around for as long as possible. Many three-month contracts have become two year positions for me (and only haven't continued for longer because of the public sectors inability to find funds to make the post permanent). I consider myself very lucky to have found my current post in the third sector to be permanent; quite rare for my role, especially at the salary they've offered me. I'm holding on to this for as long as humanly possible. 

There are firms who go above and beyond, checking if "I'm OK" and "If I need any help" which, to be honest I don't really know how to handle. I wasn't conditioned to be emotionally supported and I was never taught how to be emotionally supportive. I might open up to my current employer one day, it seems other people appreciate that but having spent most of my working life as a contractor has meant I'm conditioned to not making emotional ties or bonds with co-workers. 

I don't really consider my emotional state in the workplace at all. 

Give me access to the tools and resources I need to do an excellent job, and I'll do an excellent job. I will get up at 5AM and finish at 6PM if that's what is best for me and the firm. I'll do plenty outside my job spec if that's what's best for me and the firm. I'll train your miscriant employees and transform them into either quitters, or winners. Whatever's best for the firm. 

That's all I care about. Being part of something that has meaning within society, which I can respect, with a renumeration package that suits my dedication, and doing what's best. 

My pleasure comes in being able to provide for my family and my loved ones. 

The one word that best describes my approach to life, and one which I wholeheartedly endorse is pragmatism. 

ginger_chocolate

There are firms who go above and beyond, checking if "I'm OK" and "If I need any help" which, to be honest I don't really know how to handle.

Slightly off topic but I'm so glad this isn't just me! This always makes me feel slightly awkward and confused. But others seem to appreciate it so I guess its a good thing that they're trying to look after people in different ways.

MovingForwards

A lot of places offer MH support now as it's one of the big reasons people take time off work.

ginger_chocolate

I think being able to tolerate it is important too. I took the approach of trying to make the most of my time outside of work, but there's no getting around the fact you spend a lot of your life there too.

Well, one way of looking at it is that humans have always spent a large portion of their lives doing things they don't really want to do (work, laundry, nappy changing, risking life and limb in battle, marrying an idiot cos your parents told you to, running from woolly mammoths...). It's the bits in between where you find the value
Don't get me wrong, I absolutely believe the current 9-5 school-death salary dependent working system is flawed, as do a growing number of people. I think change is coming - eventually our working lives will become more flexible, work life balance will improve, and employers will start to see that working long, repetitive micro-managed hours  does not necessarily equal greater productivity - but change is a process and we're still in the middle of it. You can campaign, make arguments, write blogs, vote, join unions, stand for parliament, whatever you want to do about it - but in the meantime, to a certain extent, we just need to suck it up.

Mickey666

Not many clock-watchers are going to progress to senior positions and the salaries that go with them.
Just a personal choice/ambition really.

MovingForwards

I've actually had a few sessions of some yoga type thing, not yoga but can't remember what it was classed as. Work also run mindfulness sessions and other things.

For me it's not necessarily what it is, but rather it's the only time I have the escape from work, properly break up my day, chat with people about other things aside from work / Covid / who's the latest person annoying whoever I'm speaking with.

Not many jobs are 100% perfect, it's a case of taking the rough with the smooth, taking something you like, small, insignificant and turning it into a good, happy part of your day / week.

Companies can't always offer more money, not if they want long-term stability and success. So it's a case of sticking with it or keep moving to another one just for the money. 

You really do need to turn your negative thinking around, speak with your GP and get help for your MH and then you will be in a better position to find a more suitable job / career.

theoretica

ushjr said:

Because I'm not going to get the salary level required to pay my mortgage in something I have no experience in.

If your mortgage is an albatross round your neck have you seriously considered if it would suit you better to move to somewhere you could live more cheaply which earning less in a job you think would suit you more?

bartelbe

Mickey666 said:

Not many clock-watchers are going to progress to senior positions and the salaries that go with them.
Just a personal choice/ambition really.

You're very naive, promotion in too many British workplaces has more to do with politics than hard work and ability. What has always struck me about the places I have worked, is the most competent and dedicated staff were all at supervisor level. They were the staff that went the extra mile.

Yet despite their ability they were overlooked for promotion time and time again. The reason was simple, they told management what they needed to hear, instead of what management wanted to hear. That was in the long terms interests of the business or organisation but they paid the price for doing the right thing.

Too many who were promoted were picked because they licked the right !!!!!! or didn't the rock the boat. I have known absolutely bone idle incompetents who have reached management level.

The idea that hard work is rewarded in this country is an utter myth.

Mickey666

bartelbe said:

Mickey666 said:

Not many clock-watchers are going to progress to senior positions and the salaries that go with them.
Just a personal choice/ambition really.

You're very naive, promotion in too many British workplaces has more to do with politics than hard work and ability. What has always struck me about the places I have worked, is the most competent and dedicated staff were all at supervisor level. They were the staff that went the extra mile.

Yet despite their ability they were overlooked for promotion time and time again. The reason was simple, they told management what they needed to hear, instead of what management wanted to hear. That was in the long terms interests of the business or organisation but they paid the price for doing the right thing.

Too many who were promoted were picked because they licked the right !!!!!! or didn't the rock the boat. I have known absolutely bone idle incompetents who have reached management level.

The idea that hard work is rewarded in this country is an utter myth.

Then your experience is very different to mine.  Of course politics is a factor, but without the ability to deliver, either through sheer innate ability or by application, then even the brown-nosers won't last long because the higher you rise the fewer places there are to hide.  Believe me, when you're presenting results of a public company at the annual shareholder's meeting, you don't last long if you're an 'absolutely bone-idle incompetent'.  You might, just might, get away with it once, if you're really lucky.  I managed it for eight years before deciding to retire at 50, having started work as a trainee programmer with no formal qualifications in computing (though I did have a science degree), so I might be many things but naive is not one of them.

bartelbe

Mickey666 said:

bartelbe said:

Mickey666 said:

Not many clock-watchers are going to progress to senior positions and the salaries that go with them.
Just a personal choice/ambition really.

You're very naive, promotion in too many British workplaces has more to do with politics than hard work and ability. What has always struck me about the places I have worked, is the most competent and dedicated staff were all at supervisor level. They were the staff that went the extra mile.

Yet despite their ability they were overlooked for promotion time and time again. The reason was simple, they told management what they needed to hear, instead of what management wanted to hear. That was in the long terms interests of the business or organisation but they paid the price for doing the right thing.

Too many who were promoted were picked because they licked the right !!!!!! or didn't the rock the boat. I have known absolutely bone idle incompetents who have reached management level.

The idea that hard work is rewarded in this country is an utter myth.

Then your experience is very different to mine.  Of course politics is a factor, but without the ability to deliver, either through sheer innate ability or by application, then even the brown-nosers won't last long because the higher you rise the fewer places there are to hide.  Believe me, when you're presenting results of a public company at the annual shareholder's meeting, you don't last long if you're an 'absolutely bone-idle incompetent'.  You might, just might, get away with it once, if you're really lucky.  I managed it for eight years before deciding to retire at 50, having started work as a trainee programmer with no formal qualifications in computing (though I did have a science degree), so I might be many things but naive is not one of them.

Really? Would you care to explain why business after business has gone under in this country, if we only promote the very best to the top?

Buy yourself a copy of Private Eye and marvel at utter incompetents, in both the public and private sector. People who have cost the organisations they have worked for millions, in some cases hundreds of millions. Who have literally destroyed the companies they have worked for.

Yet they have not been punished for that, instead they received massive golden parachutes and the chance to f**k up another company or orgainisation. Why these clowns get chance after chance is beyond me but they do.

The idea that people at the top in this country are appointed on merit is utterly laughable.