Amicable wife, happy to get clean break divorce, but we have 2 children?

gtanny

Hey,
Quick background: Me and my wife split up end of 2017 and have both moved on with new partners, we have 2 children 8 & 12 that I happily pay CSA for.
We get on absolutely fine since we split up as we have both seen enough rough breakups to not use the children for ammo.


So in the next year or so my partner will be in a position to put a deposit down on a house but I would be going in on a joint mortgage with her to maximise our budget, we both work full time with reasonably well paid jobs, obviously before I want to be part of purchasing a house I would prefer to get the divorce done with a clean break agreement so there is no risk that my wife will come after the property (after 10 years of marriage I know her and its unlikely she ever would but things can always change so I would like to remove any risk)

I've looked online at the quick divorce places and they seem like a quick and simple option, and rated highly on trust pilot, unfortunately a lot of other guides say to avoid such things or that I can just DIY the divorce, I've tried to find a guide that would cover this with a clean break but I'm unable to.

my wife has stated she would be happy with a full clean break order as she knows I would never stop paying CSA (she's correct, I want to support them as much as I can do) but everything I have found states that this would not be possible as there are children involved I would need a consent agreement (I think that's the correct term).

We have already split everything up we own and the only financial link left is that she uses and pays for a phone in which the contract is in my name, most of the debt was in my name so I took that on and I am currently working through paying it off.


Does anyone know where to start? I want to get this started sooner rather than later but it seems like such a minefield of various options ranging from £200 to thousands.

Finally, my wife and her new partner are both currently unemployed, would she be able to get the divorce paid for or would I still need to get the £550 court fees?

Savvy_Sue

You can't have a clean break where there are children. 

You can resolve things amicably, but you probably both need legal advice because a judge will want to be satisfied that you understand the implications of the financial arrangements.

Read up on wikivorce etc but phone some local solicitors and see who is used to amicable divorce as opposed to fighting for every last penny ....

pphillips

Start here: https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/form-d8-application-for-a-divorce-dissolution-or-to-apply-for-a-judicial-separation-order and here https://www.gov.uk/get-help-with-court-fees if your wife is divorcing you. She may qualify for an exemption, in which case the court fee won't have to be paid.

Who starts the divorce proceeding will usually depend on who is least at fault. This is because it's not possible to seek a fault based divorce blaming yourself for the breakdown of the marriage. 

You won't be able to DIY the consent order, try getting quotes for a fixed fee from a range of legal firms.

gtanny

Savvy_Sue said:

You can't have a clean break where there are children. 

You can resolve things amicably, but you probably both need legal advice because a judge will want to be satisfied that you understand the implications of the financial arrangements.

Read up on wikivorce etc but phone some local solicitors and see who is used to amicable divorce as opposed to fighting for every last penny ....

Cheers Sue, ill have a browse through Wikivorce and ill see if she's happy to start the proceedings. 

pphillips said:

Start here: https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/form-d8-application-for-a-divorce-dissolution-or-to-apply-for-a-judicial-separation-order and here https://www.gov.uk/get-help-with-court-fees if your wife is divorcing you. She may qualify for an exemption, in which case the court fee won't have to be paid.

Who starts the divorce proceeding will usually depend on who is least at fault. This is because it's not possible to seek a fault based divorce blaming yourself for the breakdown of the marriage. 

You won't be able to DIY the consent order, try getting quotes for a fixed fee from a range of legal firms.

Cheers, ill ask her to look about exepmtion as there was no fault as such but it was my choice initially to end the relationship so she may need to divorce me.
I'll make some phone calls next week for legal firms and see if i can get a fixed fee.

gettingtheresometime

However good the relationship is now (and I commend you for that) but I'd think long and hard about being on a mortgage with her even after you've divorced.....as I understand it you can't be on a mortgage without being on the deeds and if that is the case if you buy a property before or after this purchase, you'll get hit for the extra stamp duty as well as being tied financially to her.
In addition I'd encourage her to take a phone contract out in her name.
There have been lots of posts where a person is in a financial mess because the person they had lent money to or are tied to have acted in a way that they never thought possible so why put that good relationship in harm's way?

onwards&upwards

He wants to take out a mortgage with his new partner, not his soon to be ex wife.  

silvercar

gettingtheresometime said:

However good the relationship is now (and I commend you for that) but I'd think long and hard about being on a mortgage with her even after you've divorced.....as I understand it you can't be on a mortgage without being on the deeds and if that is the case if you buy a property before or after this purchase, you'll get hit for the extra stamp duty as well as being tied financially to her.
In addition I'd encourage her to take a phone contract out in her name.
There have been lots of posts where a person is in a financial mess because the person they had lent money to or are tied to have acted in a way that they never thought possible so why put that good relationship in harm's way?

I read it as OP wants to take out a mortgage with the new partner not the ex-wife.

i agree with moving the phone contract over, all you need is for her to accidentally get charges on the account and you could start with disagreements.

the time to finalise the financial settlement and divorce is now, before your relationship turns sour. Even though you both get on well at the moment, in the future you could face disagreements, particularly when you and your new partner have ‘well paid jobs’ and her and her new partner are unemployed. Money does funny things to people.

Voyager2002

pphillips said:

Who starts the divorce proceeding will usually depend on who is least at fault. This is because it's not possible to seek a fault based divorce blaming yourself for the breakdown of the marriage.

They separated in 2017, so should be able to get a 'no-fault' divorce on the grounds of two years' separation with consent.

pphillips

Voyager2002 said:

pphillips said:

Who starts the divorce proceeding will usually depend on who is least at fault. This is because it's not possible to seek a fault based divorce blaming yourself for the breakdown of the marriage.

They separated in 2017, so should be able to get a 'no-fault' divorce on the grounds of two years' separation with consent.

Thanks, that makes for a very simple D8 form, all the more reason to go DIY.

gtanny

Hey again,

Thanks for all the replies, to clear a few things up.
Yes, I am looking to get a mortgage with my new partner not my soon to be ex wife.

I'll sort out transfering the phone contract over to her soon, even unemployed she should be able to get a basic phone contract.

Will I still be able to get a simple D8 form divorce as I'll need the consent order, looking on wikivorce I will still need a solicitor to write this up I just need to be very clear that we both agree before I get it written.

I understand the divorce and the consent order are both separate things so if I get a D8 started then sort out a solicitor for the consent order would I be on the right track?

pphillips

gtanny said:

Hey again,

Thanks for all the replies, to clear a few things up.
Yes, I am looking to get a mortgage with my new partner not my soon to be ex wife.

I'll sort out transfering the phone contract over to her soon, even unemployed she should be able to get a basic phone contract.

Will I still be able to get a simple D8 form divorce as I'll need the consent order, looking on wikivorce I will still need a solicitor to write this up I just need to be very clear that we both agree before I get it written.

I understand the divorce and the consent order are both separate things so if I get a D8 started then sort out a solicitor for the consent order would I be on the right track?

The D8 and the Form A (for a consent order) are separate forms. The D8 is always done first. Once the D8 is issued the solicitor will need the court reference number to put on the Form A.