Crematorium spelt my father's name incorrectly. What would you do?

Lord_Frugal12

Hello! 
Recently, my father died from COVID-19. As the Next of Kin, I arranged the whole funeral.  The crematorium made a mistake with the spelling of my father's middle name.  Although a part of me does not want to make a big issue out of it, my father's siblings and relatives are finding it a critical error. So, I hope you might have some experience of dealing with this type of situation with funeral directors and crematorium. 

Here is the issue: 
I gave all the details about my father's name to the funeral directors. They also had the official documents regarding my father's death.  
On the day of the funeral, as I was going in to the chapel, that's when I noticed that the crematorium had spelt my father's middle name incorrectly. This was on the list of funerals on the door of their chapel.  After the funeral service,  the same error was seen on a large yellow sign in the garden of remembrance.  So, I raised this issue with the funeral directors. They said they would take it up with the crematorium. 
Now, I collected my father's ashes. Once again, on the box and the cremation certificate*, the name middle name is spelt incorrectly. 

This middle name was important for my father. And it has become more important for me in the past twenty years. So, for the crematorium to have made this mistake does annoy me. At the same time, I don't want to come across as a "difficult person" for something that could be perceived by some people as nitpicking. 

So, I want to ask the crematorium (and the Funeral Directors) for an explanation. I also do NOT just want an apology. It has to be more than that. Interestingly, my father died without a single insurance policy. So, I had to find the money to pay for this funeral. And after paying a lot of money to the Funeral Directors (and thus the crematorium), I do have the right to ask for some compensation. Am I right?    
 
  *Cremation Certificate. Not to be confused with the Death Certificate which has the correct spelling!  

Marcon

Lord_Frugal12 said:

Hello! 
Recently, my father died from COVID-19. As the Next of Kin, I arranged the whole funeral.  The crematorium made a mistake with the spelling of my father's middle name.  Although a part of me does not want to make a big issue out of it, my father's siblings and relatives are finding it a critical error. So, I hope you might have some experience of dealing with this type of situation with funeral directors and crematorium. 

Here is the issue: 
I gave all the details about my father's name to the funeral directors. They also had the official documents regarding my father's death.  
On the day of the funeral, as I was going in to the chapel, that's when I noticed that the crematorium had spelt my father's middle name incorrectly. This was on the list of funerals on the door of their chapel.  After the funeral service,  the same error was seen on a large yellow sign in the garden of remembrance.  So, I raised this issue with the funeral directors. They said they would take it up with the crematorium. 
Now, I collected my father's ashes. Once again, on the box and the cremation certificate*, the name middle name is spelt incorrectly. 

This middle name was important for my father. And it has become more important for me in the past twenty years. So, for the crematorium to have made this mistake does annoy me. At the same time, I don't want to come across as a "difficult person" for something that could be perceived by some people as nitpicking. 

So, I want to ask the crematorium (and the Funeral Directors) for an explanation. I also do NOT just want an apology. It has to be more than that. Interestingly, my father died without a single insurance policy. So, I had to find the money to pay for this funeral. And after paying a lot of money to the Funeral Directors (and thus the crematorium), I do have the right to ask for some compensation. Am I right?    
 
  *Cremation Certificate. Not to be confused with the Death Certificate which has the correct spelling!  

This is clearly all about compensation, not hurt feelings. The explanation is simple: error.

You can ask for compensation, but you aren't likely to be offered more than a token gesture. These things happen and using them as an excuse to join the compensation culture isn't attractive and isn't a fitting way to end your father's involvement with matters on earth.

What would I do? Nothing. 

Tealblue

It was an error, but you suffered no material loss and in has done your father's memory no harm. Looks like you are just trying to ramp things up to get some money back on the funeral. All you'll do is drag out the distress for everyone; the least said the better. I can't believe the siblings and relatives are finding it such a 'critical error' that they can't come to terms with it.

lincroft1710

Would compensation make the incorrect spelling acceptable?

Not really.

You can ask but you have no right in law to back up your request other than in expensive litigation, which you could lose. Why not ask the crem to amend the sign in the garden of remembrance? And possibly issue a new certificate.

Flugelhorn

In my parents' wills, my middle name was spelled wrongly - I was only executor and beneficiary.  Wills were drawn by relative who was a solicitor specialising in Probate 
TBH I had a bit of a laugh when I saw it - well what else can you do when the nearest and dearest can't even get it right?!
When it came to probate I pointed it out to solictor doing the oath as was concerned it might cause a problem - she just said "clerical error  " so I ignored it and all was fine.
What the crematorium did was just an error - nothing harmful intended - if you having a memorial stone then at least it can be right on there

Dox

Lord_Frugal12 said:

So, I want to ask the crematorium (and the Funeral Directors) for an explanation. I also do NOT just want an apology. It has to be more than that. Interestingly, my father died without a single insurance policy. So, I had to find the money to pay for this funeral. And after paying a lot of money to the Funeral Directors (and thus the crematorium), I do have the right to ask for some compensation. Am I right?    
 
  *Cremation Certificate. Not to be confused with the Death Certificate which has the correct spelling!  

What sort of 'explanation' are you expecting? There is only one: human error.

This is obviously about money rather than finer feelings, so why not ask the executors to settle the funeral bill out of the estate?

[Deleted User]

Lord_Frugal12 said: Interestingly, my father died without a single insurance policy.

That's not interesting. It happens more often than not.

Just move on. Don't cheapen your father's memory by grubbing around for cash.

74jax

Lord_Frugal12 said:

Hello! 
Recently, my father died from COVID-19. As the Next of Kin, I arranged the whole funeral.  The crematorium made a mistake with the spelling of my father's middle name.  

Here is the issue: 
On the day of the funeral, as I was going in to the chapel, that's when I noticed that the crematorium had spelt my father's middle name incorrectly. 
Now, I collected my father's ashes. Once again, on the box and the cremation certificate*, the name middle name is spelt incorrectly. 
So, I want to ask the crematorium (and the Funeral Directors) for an explanation.
 I also do NOT just want an apology. It has to be more than that. Interestingly, my father died without a single insurance policy. So, I had to find the money to pay for this funeral. And after paying a lot of money to the Funeral Directors (and thus the crematorium), I do have the right to ask for some compensation. Am I right?    

I'm so sorry for your loss, my mam too died of covid 19 and its a terrible time.

You ask are you right? Not to me, but that doesn't matter. If you want to ask for compensation go ahead. But I see it as an error.  The funeral service is under immense pressure, and everyone makes mistakes.

However, I'm guessing when you first noticed the error on the day of the funeral you informed someone (otherwise how would they know to rectify for future). What I would suggest is contacting the crem, explaining on xx day you informed Bob the spelling was wrong and are disappointed to learn it wasn't rectified on the box as asked you collected. I would say as you plan on keeping this box is there a way a new box with the correct spelling can be collected. 

And that's it.

I'm not sure what you mean about insurance documents and you HAD to pay for the funeral? If there was no money in the estate you certainly do not HAVE to pay.  Its not 'interesting', just common. 

warby68

Ask for the permanent items to be reissued with the correct spelling - that's what I think you have a right to ask the service providers for.
Its not nitpicking as you say to want the permanent records to be correct and you do have a slight gripe with the funeral directors who didn't correct it between funeral and return of ashes, paperwork etc.
It is nitpicking to make a song and dance about reasons for a simple error in the first place.
The blatant compo quest is unattractive - keep your dignity.

HHarry

There were a couple of errors made at my Dad’s funerals.  We asked for a good-will donation to be made to the charity we were collecting for, which they did.

pattycake

I have a friend who works for the local crematorium.  They are under immense pressure at the current time with a large workload and suffering abuse from bereaved who seem to think it is the fault of the staff that numbers have to be limited at a funeral.  It is a mistake with no real harm done.  Put it behind you and mourn your parent.