Provision for teenage children when both married parents die

Listmaker22

Our three children are aged 14-18 years.  If both me and my husband die, we would like the 18 year old to be the guardian of the younger children.   We only have £100 on the mortgage, no debts and some savings and we are going to organise mirror wills.  We would like our estate to be shared equally between them.  My sister can be the executor and trustee to manage this until they are 21.  I would like the three of them to initially live in the family house together and use some of our money to cover their household expenses, food and drink, clothing, education costs, sporting activities, birthday gifts, school trips and any other reasonable expenses that benefit the children until the youngest is 21 years old.  They can then decide whether to sell the house or live in it beyond that time.
Is there anything else we need to consider and is this easy to organise in a will?  Thanks.

xylophone

A STEP solicitor will draft wills with the appropriate terms.

https://www.step.org/step-directory

AnotherJoe

1. Why have you got £100 on the mortgage? Not for the deed storage i hope?

2. You cant control life from beyond the grave. You write as if they will be forced to live in the house until the eldest is 25? What if none of them wish to?

3. Why mirror wills? That doesn't really have any bearing on the situation if you both die at the same time.

4. What condition will trigger selling the house? Majority? Suppose one desperately wants to move out and needs the money but the other two are content to stay there for years?

5. Whats the plan if one of you dies first (much more likely)?  Does the other inherit and sister doesn't come into it?

6. Is there a backup executor? Suppose you two and sister are in the same hot air balloon tragedy?  

7. Is the 18 year old happy to be guardian? Why not sister? What if 18 year old is at uni or working miles away, how can they look after the 15 year old?

Savvy_Sue

AnotherJoe makes good points. We appointed guardians with the understanding we didn't expect them to take the boys, just to make the right decisions about where they should live and with whom etc - and to look after the dosh etc. When they were young I'd have anticipated the best thing being to keep them together, but as they got older it wasn't necessarily going to be the right thing to do. 

I wouldn't have wanted to assume that the eldest would be able to / want to take care of his little brothers. It's a huge thing, to me. And I'd always felt that I could leave any two of them 'home alone', but all three was not usually a good idea! 

strawb_shortcake

When my Husband's Mum passed away he was 21, there was no will, his Dad was living in Asia so it fell to him to look after his Brother. We had been together 6 months at the time and it wasn't the right thing for anyone, I'm not sure what the right answer was or even if there was a right answer. Other than my parents we didn't have a support network and it took years for my Husband grieve. 
I think you really need to think hard about what the harsh realities would be for your eldest should your will need to be enacted. 

AnotherJoe

p.s. Once the youngest is 18, then unless you go through some serious legal shenanigans (which can have other unwanted consequences) , the money becomes theirs anyway, so any "until age 21" clause is likely to be very problematic.

p.p.s. Hope this doesn't come across as argumentative, just pointing out some issues/ things you may not have thought about or known.

sheramber

What is some savings?
Where the money come from to run the house, pay for repairs and pay for food, clothes etc for the children for how many years?

Mojisola

Listmaker22 said:

Our three children are aged 14-18 years.  If both me and my husband die, we would like the 18 year old to be the guardian of the younger children.  

I absolutely wouldn't put this responsibility on a young adult.  I think it's a terrible idea.

Listmaker22

Thanks everyone for your comments - they're really helpful and much appreciated.  It's useful to hear experiences of others and has made me realise that perhaps we don't need to control things as much as I thought.  In answer to some of the questions:

1. £100 on mortgage is to keep the deeds as it's cheaper than storing them elsewhere.  Savings are about £200k.
2. Sister lives 250 miles away, so can help with administering estate in terms of paperwork, but not close enough to look after the children (she has primary school aged children 4-8 years).
3. 18 year old is not going to University - they will be working locally.  I envisaged that other relatives/friends would help and give advice on issues that may need someone older who has more experience (e.g. organising house insurance, sorting out house repairs, gas and electricity bills etc.)
4. Could the younger teenagers olds live in the house with the 18 year old, with the three children looking after themselves with things like cooking, washing clothes etc, so that they can stay together, go to the same schools and be near their friends; whilst having another adult being their official guardian who doesn't live with them?
What arrangements have others put in their wills for children of a similar age, or what would have helped you if you have been in a similar situation?

AnotherJoe

1. I suggest you pay the mortgage off. Deeds dont need to be stored any more (not since the late 90's !!). If your house isn't registered on the LR site then for goodness sake get it done now because that could be a mess to deal with when going through probate and deeds cant be found. A few threads about that on the housing forum now. Deeds are pretty much just bits of paper unless your house isn't registered and even then not really essential. If you bought your house this century then the deeds are already irrelevant.

3. They are now. What if they join the navy next year or find an awesome job 100 miles away or decide to go live with someone  or or or..

4. I dont know. Probably. When our kids were much younger we had my brother as potential  guardian and pretty much left it up to him to decide what the best thing would be. Too hard to cater for all eventualities in a will. 

Realistically you are pretty much past the point at which you need to cater for this, whatever you specify if the (by then 15 year old doesn't want to do what guardian (sister or elder brother) wants, a court is likely to side with her assuming its not out and out dangerous. eg say she wantsto go to a residential college or something age 16. And the 17 year old will be 18 and an adult in the eyes of the law.

If it was me I'd leave it to sister to discuss with them what they wanted and help make that happen. And make sure the house could be sold even if only one of them wanted it.

Dox

An 18 year old becoming an overnight guardian to two stroppy teenage siblings, just after losing their parents and thus in shock and deep grief? Have you discussed it with the children?