Do I need to 'Divorce' my mother?

Nicolerosa

I'll try put a long story short. 
1. I'm applying for my first British passport. I sent the proof asked, my birth cert, fathers birth cert and marriage cert. They then sent an e-mail asking for my mothers birth cert. 
2. I haven't spoken to my mother since 2002. She lost custody of me and my brother due (physically and mental abuse).  Also all ties to that side of family was cut. They made no further effort with me. 
3. The only information I had was that she was born in Germany (this really complicated getting a certificate).
4. I explained ALL of this to the HM Passport office to which they said that I would have to contact my mother to obtain the information!! How can they ask someone who was abused to contact the abuser?!
5. It got me thinking. I often here of children having to cover costs of funeral and debts when their parents died due to them not having made arrangements beforehand. I do not believe that me nor my brother should have to be involved in this. But would i be legally involved due to being her eldest child. 
6. I cannot find much information online but would 'divorcing' my mother cut all legal ties with her? 
Any advice is appreciated, Its stressed out a lot over the last few days, its not a time of my life I like to think about. I'm surprised by the lack of compassion of the HM Passport office (I know they have a job to do, but seriously? asking me to contact her is tough). 

[Deleted User]

 You don't need to contact her. Just apply for her birth certificate easy done 

you can't divorce a parent and do not need to have any involvement after death if you don't want to. 

Nicolerosa

Applying for a German birth certificate requires knowing the exact city in which she was born. The only information I have is Germany. 

CRANKY40

I'd try speaking to the passport office again. What happens for instance if you get in touch with your mother and she won't provide the information? What if you can't contact your mother? There must be procedures for this. Ask to speak to a supervisor if the first person that you speak to isn't helpful. 

[Deleted User]

 Is your father British?

Nicolerosa

My father is British, I have provided his British Passport No. British Birth cert and British Marriage. 
I will call again tomorrow. Hopefully they have someway around this. It seems rather unfair to not allow me a passport due to something that was out of my control as a minor. She still poses a threat to me this day so contact with her is just out of the question. 

Nicolerosa

Thank you all for your advice.

MysteryMe

Does your father not know where she came from in Germany or know any of her family?

zagfles

It might be worth contacting your MP about this. It the sort of thing they can often help with.

Cloudycoffee

Were your mum and dad married at the time you were born? 

If so you shouldn’t need to supply your mums documentation.