Please help Scared

leigh48

Yes I am juggling massively and almost to the point i cannot carry on and need to stop burrying my head in the sand.
I would willingly accept a BRU I know this is the least I deserve. I just cannot risk my mums house.
I do appreciate your thoughts and I will give the National Debtline a call.

leigh48

I understand that although it would be more considered a gift from my other halfs parents, they have some money set aside for our wedding but after the death of my father I decided i never want to get married. My partner has said they would be willing to give us the money to help out of this situation around £10k.

fatbelly

I'd be interested to know the opinions of the specialists who deal more with bankruptcies than I do (Debt Doctor?) - I do loads of DROs and few bankruptcies.

leigh48 wrote: »

I understand that although it would be more considered a gift from my other halfs parents, they have some money set aside for our wedding but after the death of my father I decided i never want to get married. My partner has said they would be willing to give us the money to help out of this situation around £10k.

How were you thinking of using the 10k?

leigh48

Thankyou i appreciate hearing as much advice or opinions as anyone is able to give.
Re - how to use it - Im not sure its something iv only just considered as an option, maybe pay the highest interest cards off with the lump sum then as much as possible as fast as possible off the rest to get under the 20k threshold. Or, i dont know if its a viable option, and it scares me to think about to let the debts be sold to debt collection agencies then try to make settlement offers for them...

leigh48

i just read that you cannot favour one debt over others so the 10k would obviously have to be shared equally among the debts if this is the route i went

fatbelly

leigh48 wrote: »

i just read that you cannot favour one debt over others so the 10k would obviously have to be shared equally among the debts if this is the route i went

You're talking about preferential payments. But a third party can do what it wants with its money so would not constitute a preference.

Keep it on the back burner for now, in their account - they should not be paying it to you.

Minkym00

In bankruptcy, what you’re talking about is a preferential payment. There is only really an issue with this is the payment is made to a connected party (i.e. family member, generally speaking). So if you owed anything to a connected party and paid them rather than any others, that would be you preferring them and likely action would be taken to reverse it, and could mean a BRO. There is no issue in paying off the higher interest rate cards first, that is just sensible!

Jonathan_Kelvin

leigh48 wrote: »

Yes I am juggling massively and almost to the point i cannot carry on and need to stop burrying my head in the sand.
I would willingly accept a BRU I know this is the least I deserve. I just cannot risk my mums house.
I do appreciate your thoughts and I will give the National Debtline a call.

You risked her house when you put money I to it I stead of paying off your debts, so I’m afraid that that ship sailed long ago.

How much equity is there in it now?

leigh48

thankyou Minkym00 and fatbelly that makes sense now.

Jonathan Kelvin There is plenty of equity in her house but i will not risk her house being involved whatsoever. It was stupid of me to not pay my debts with the money but I had no other way of sorting the living arrangement for my boys.
As an aside, my dad was in the process of trying to release equity from his house when he died in order to build us this conservatory/extension, he ended up in hospital before anything was finalised and actually wrote a 'will' (nothing official as he was off his head on morphine) saying he wanted us to sell the house when he died to pay for the build. I know this is not something that will make a difference to my situation just adding to try to explain my actions were not completely selfish and i was trying to think of my whole families wishes without realising the consequenses for my own situation.
I am just at a loss now of to how i can possibly resolve the situation and move on with my life without bringing my mum and her house into my messed up life

MEM62

leigh48 wrote: »

There is plenty of equity in her house but i will not risk her house being involved whatsoever.

I understand your desire for this to be the case but you need to be prepared for the fact that this choice may no longer be in your hands. You need proper advice on where you stand.