Please help Scared

leigh48

I seem to have got myself in a horrible situation and just cannot see a way out without getting myself and my family into even more trouble.
Ill try to describe my situation...
In 2009 i borrowed 18k (24k repayable) i already had 7k on credit cards. i borrowed the money to buy a business. The business never really took off and in 2013 it ended up costing me money every month to keep going, i tried for a year to sell it to no avail so gave up and carried on paying monthly payments for loan.
I had my first baby later that year and my credit card limits upped to 15k which i eventually maxed out on baby stuff and just general spending.
I started matched betting and earnt enough to make all my minimum repayments, some months paid off big chunks of debt other months had to draw money off them as id started doing casino offers and had some losing runs.
between then and 2018/19 ended up taking more credit - 14k on a card, spent on two more babies, moving into an empty house (more on that later) and just general spending i honestly dont know where the money went.
still never missed payments etc but probably used credit to pay credit.
now comes the part where i messed up most... 2018 my dad died and i ended up inheriting £32k from the sale of his house. i planned to use this to clear my debt but didnt.
To reverse a little... when i had first baby i was living at home unable to buy a property my mum offered to remortgage her house and we built an extension on it that became my little house. I only planned to have one child so my house only has my tiny bedroom then an even tinier box room that was for my eldest. We managed to squeeze a small todller bunk bed in the room for the two eldest but theres no room for a bed for my youngest and no room for a full size bed which my eldest desperately needed.
Sorry for the waffle but i promise its relevent! So i decided to use my dads money to build a conservatory on my mums house which enabled this to become the new living room, my mum has moved her bedroom downstairs to the old living room, my boys got full size bunks in my mums old room and baby moved into the box room.
This has made my family situation SO much better but obviously not my debt situation. Matched betting is practically dead, and iv two children at home so only able to claim at present.
Now in the situation of more money going out than coming in and around 40k debt.
Have been advised that BR may be my best option but I am so scared. I have never done anything 'wrong' in my life, I have a degree and cannot believe my finances have got so out of control.
Have done lots of research and am just so scared of how the OR will view me spending my inheritance on building a conservatory. Also obviously me getting myself in this situation in the first place but mostly the inheritance thing.
Is it possible for the OR to reverse the transaction somehow? Could they do anything with my mums house as iv used my money for the benefit of the house?
Is it worth me making just token payments to creditors for a year or so until 2 years has passed before i go BR?
I fully expect and deserve a BRU/O and would accept this of course, im just worried something worse could happen.
Im terrified right now and just feel iv messed up not only my life but my families too

fatbelly

So if I've read this right you have 40k of unsecured debt, no earned income or assets but may have acquired a beneficial interest in your mum's property by spending a 32k windfall on building a conservatory there.

Generally beneficial interest follows title in bankruptcy but as this happened recently and it sounds like you were insolvent at the time I can't say it wouldn't be an issue.

How does the 40k break down and who is threatening what?

Also what are your plans for the future?

xylophone

https://capuk.org/

Try above for free debt advice. The assistance is for all, regardless of faith or lack of it!

They certainly seem to have impressed Martin Lewis (and the Archbishop of Canterbury)!

leigh48

Thankyou for the reply.
Yes thats pretty much a breakdown of events and sounds even more ridiculous now you have put it like that.
I owe 4k on a personal loan, the rest is over 4 credit cards. Nothing is been threatened as I have not yet even made a late or missed payment to anyone.
My plans for the future... never get into this situation again. Hopefully complete my masters degree to enable me to earn more when my youngest two start school and nursery.
There is no point me boring you further with my reasons for spending the money as it doesnt change the situation iv created for myself but i am so full of regrets right now.
Is there anyway out of this situation for me without jepordising my mums house?

xylophone

Is there anyway out of this situation for me without jepordising my mums house?

Get some advice as above as a first step.

leigh48

Thankyou I will contact them tomorrow

leigh48

From what i gather the process of claiming a DRO seems much more simple. In light of this, in my situation could it be safer for me to try and get the interest and payments on my cards frozen whilst i try to make my debt level under the £20k limit? i could possibly borrow from a family member, and maybe get a job working nights, sell my car (only worth £1k) and use ebay to sell as much as i possibly can.
I would appreciate any thoughts on this

Minkym00

The OR is almost certainly going to take recovery action to reclaim the money spent on your mum’s house. It may be that they come to agreement with her and take less, they may put a charge on it, or it’s possible they may force a sale.

leigh48

I appreciate you're reply. I simply cannot allow my mum to suffer due to my own stupidity, she has her own health issues and I would rather just not be here than allow that to happen.
Would the same consequences apply if i was able to reduce my debt to a level that allowed me to take out a DRO?

fatbelly

I doubt anyone is going to be definitive on this - only this 'may' happen etc.

National Debtline is probably your best bet to talk to a specialist, rather than stepchange, payplan etc.

Maintaining your contractual payments on 40k must be difficult on benefit income - are you juggling debts? First step is to stop paying them and make sure you are banking where you do not have debts.

I don't know who you took advice from earlier re bankruptcy but I'm tending to agree - get this out of the way before you finish your degree and your kids start school. A BRU isn't the end of the world.

Any other strategy is going to drag on - might as well bite the bullet.

comeandgo

My advice is do not borrow from family member. If you have to go bankrupt and it has not been repaid they loose the lot, and you have to live with that.