Parental income question

I have been a single mum for 14 years and have one son (20) at uni and another (18) going in September. My eldest son gets the maximum maintenance loan because of my income. Last year I met a lovely man who has since moved in with me and now I believe we will be jointly responsible for topping up my 2 boys loans? He has 3 kids of his own who live with their mother 75% of the time and us the rest of the time but for whom he (rightly) contributes a great deal. My boys dad gives me nothing and never has. This seems so unfair. They won't pursue my boys dad so he gets away scot free and yet my new man is now expected to be responsible for 5 kids! Although we share household bills we each take responsibility for our own childrens additional costs, but this will now mean that I will have to ask him to contribute as I'll be unable to on my own. I've told both of the boys they will need to pay something towards it too. Has anyone had a similar experience and do they have any advice? Thanks Sarah

Replies

  • silvercarsilvercar Forumite, Ambassador
    44.9K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Academoney Grad Name Dropper
    Ambassador
    All your assumptions are correct. Short of persuading your ex to either contribute or have the kids live with them, you are stuck.
    I'm a Forum Ambassador on The Coronavirus Boards as well as the housing, in my home and student money saving boards. I volunteer to help get your forum questions answered and keep the forum running smoothly. Forum Ambassadors are not moderators and don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to [email protected] (it's not part of my role to deal with this). Any views are mine and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.com.
  • Yes - your assumptions are correct - its very expensive moving in with someone with regards to student finance. Especially so if your children were at universities with good bursary schemes for low income families.

    In reality a lot of people who know how the financing works would postpone formally living together for a few years.
  • edited 5 February 2020 at 5:43PM
    piggy_bankpiggy_bank Forumite
    32 Posts
    edited 5 February 2020 at 5:43PM
    Unfortunately yes, that is the case.

    I moved out at 18 to live in my uni city permanently and then dropped out of my course. A few years later my mum's boyfriend moved in with her, and her household income went from about £15k to £60k. When I went back to uni at 23, despite living with my partner, owning our own house and having supported myself financially for 5 years, student finance still took my mum's household income into account, meaning my finance went from around £12k per year between loans, grants and scholarships, to the minimum of £3.8k.

    It's absolute rubbish, but unfortunately the way they see things and there isn't any legal way around it. Declaring your partner a lodger or not declaring him living with you would also be counted as fraud and invalidate the entire loan if they ever found out, so really not worth considering either.

    ETA: It's worth looking at the student finance calculators online for an idea of how much your boys will be entitled to. For a 40k household income, they would still get a loan of £7,225 - which is more than they would have got under the old system of loans and grants.

    There are also some well-paid student jobs advertised in the unions and through the universities, and many students do manage to work alongside uni. Although it would definitely be nice to not have to work, it is manageable!
  • silvercarsilvercar Forumite, Ambassador
    44.9K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Academoney Grad Name Dropper
    Ambassador
    piggy_bank wrote: »
    Unfortunately yes, that is the case.

    I moved out at 18 to live in my uni city permanently and then dropped out of my course. A few years later my mum's boyfriend moved in with her, and her household income went from about £15k to £60k. When I went back to uni at 23, despite living with my partner, owning our own house and having supported myself financially for 5 years, student finance still took my mum's household income into account, meaning my finance went from around £12k per year between loans, grants and scholarships, to the minimum of £3.8k.

    It's absolute rubbish, but unfortunately the way they see things and there isn't any legal way around it. Declaring your partner a lodger or not declaring him living with you would also be counted as fraud and invalidate the entire loan if they ever found out, so really not worth considering either.

    ETA: It's worth looking at the student finance calculators online for an idea of how much your boys will be entitled to. For a 40k household income, they would still get a loan of £7,225 - which is more than they would have got under the old system of loans and grants.

    There are also some well-paid student jobs advertised in the unions and through the universities, and many students do manage to work alongside uni. Although it would definitely be nice to not have to work, it is manageable!

    I understood three years of being financially independent were now sufficient.

    Marriage also moves the assessment from parent to spouse.
    I'm a Forum Ambassador on The Coronavirus Boards as well as the housing, in my home and student money saving boards. I volunteer to help get your forum questions answered and keep the forum running smoothly. Forum Ambassadors are not moderators and don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to [email protected] (it's not part of my role to deal with this). Any views are mine and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.com.
This discussion has been closed.
Latest MSE News and Guides

British Gas prepay meter users...

...to pay less for gas from 1 April

MSE News

The 'odd Easter flavours' thread 2023

What bizarre food stuffs have you spied?

MSE Forum

Energy Price Guarantee calculator

How much you'll likely pay from April

MSE Tools