I can't stop myself spending

dan958

This is not something that we can really help with. Anytime you feel like you want to buy a takeway, or something else you don't need, stop and think about the issues this will cause. Re-read your original post here before buying anything. Then move what you would have spent on that takeway over to a savings account.

hazyjo

It's all about losing that feeling of food being a reward. People don't 'deserve' a takeaway. I hear a friend at work sometimes saying things like that, and rewarding her kids with takeaways when they do things like passing exams/tests etc. They'll prob grow up getting doing the same thing, and getting those same happy rewarded feelings when they get food in. So if they, or anyone, is feeling down/low/depressed, that association will kick in when they get a takeaway. Same for spending - perhaps some parents may say they'll treat or reward their kids by buying them something and taking them shopping.


I'm sure we're all guilty of it to a certain extent. It's a lovely feeling (and taste!) when you get a Chinese or Indian in. I'd happily do it every week cos it does make you feel nice. But my OH is FAR better than me. I definitely spend when I'm feeling low. I'm guilty of it right now as we've had a rubbish start to the year and I keep buying things online.


It's recognising the triggers and trying to replace the habits you've formed, prob since childhood.

pickledonionspaceraider

It is a form of self sabotage

You know you are buying unnecessary stuff, and where continued overspending will lead...but you still do it - Why?

(I am not expecting you to answer that on here - but I mean that the root cause needs looking at)

gettingtheresometime

Also I know this sounds daft but I'm wondering if by suffering from anxiety and depression isn't playing into the overspending.

The reason I say that is when hubby and I were going through a rough patch I would spend money on things that I didn't really need. Then I heard or read that people who are depressed can overspend unintentionally because the assistant that they are interacting with is being nice to them and makes them feel valued.

Of course they're being paid to do that but if for that moment someone is making you feel special so you want more of it so spend more to experience that niceness more.

My solution was to get me to feel good about me & I got this through exercise (which will fed in with going to Slimming World) and even that doesn't mean spending money - wrap up and go for a brisk walk.

The other thing that helped was Martin's demotivator tool. Once I'd realised how long I would have to work to actually buy something it helped in deciding whether I wanted to actually buy it!

pickledonionspaceraider

GobSheite wrote: »

This is not "a condition" that you can blame. Words won't fix it. You have to

Being bad with money, can be a symptom of a mental health issue - anything from depression, anxiety, bipolar

Look it up, just type in ''is overspending a symptom of a mental health condition'' in to google

The overspending is not the problem. The overspending is a symptom of the real problem

SuperPikachu

I do this too. Been a problem for a few years now and added to my debt.

I've had varying addictions and mental health issues for years and read a lot of self help books. They have helped with alot of things but this is one big issue I still need to tackle. TBH i'm quite lazy and just go through life ignoring my problems when I can so after reading your post I might see if i can find help for this. I'll let you know if i find anything good!

edit - I'm going to give this a go:
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Spenders-Guide-Debt-Free-Living-Spending-ebook/dp/B013CANGN2/ref=sr_1_7?keywords=money+spending+problems&qid=1578923755&sr=8-7