Help with debts

needtodothis2020

Hi everyone, this is my first post so pease bare with me, i am really nervous and scared.
I am currently a ful time student in my final year at uni, the only income I receive is my student finance, this will stop in April. I have just landed a new job which I start on Monday only part time at the moment whilst I complete my degree.

I currently have around £15000 worth of credit card/store card/catalogue debt, so far I have not missed any payments, but once my student finance stops I will only be earning £400 per month (this is pro rata as I will be working in the local college).

I am starting to really struggle to pay everyone now and am not sure how i should do this.
I have taken the first steps and been onto stepchange and put in all my details and they suggest an IVA (I don't really want to go down that route if I can help it).

So I came onto here an have been reading through the various posts and from this my understanding is that:
A) I should start by cancelling all my direct debit repayments and let the accounts fall into default?
What I would have been paying put this aside to build up some funds?
C) After my accounts have all defaulted then go to Stepchange and set up a DMP?
Does this sound correct?

While going through this process I am really scared on being bombarded with letters and phone calls this is because my husband has no idea that I have debts and the scale of them.

Will I have debt collectors coming to my door to demand payment?
Can my house be taken off us (we don't have a mortgage anymore)

Any help or advice will be very helpful as I cannot carry on like this, it is making me ill and now my husband is starting to notice that I am not myself and is asking all the time if I am ok.
Many thanks

purplepaws

needtodothis2020 wrote: »

Hi everyone, this is my first post so pease bare with me, i am really nervous and scared.
Any help or advice will be very helpful as I cannot carry on like this, it is making me ill and now my husband is starting to notice that I am not myself and is asking all the time if I am ok.
Many thanks

Hi,
I'm sure someone more experienced will be able to give you more info, but I wanted to just pop in to give you some hope and support.
I know how awful life can be when debt get's hold of you. It is so important that you allow yourself to stay calm - IT WILL BE ALL OK!
It's hard to keep secrets from people we love but if you think that it is the right thing to do, then you can sort this and you can do it without letting anyone you don't want to, know.
I have been there, and still am, in debt and not telling my OH and managing it so that he doesn't need to know - it is possible (not ideal) but it is doable!
So, no, you will not lose the house, you will not have people coming to the door asking for money or taking your TV away.
It looks as though you have a good understanding of the DMP process - it really is that simple.
Today is the day YOU STOP WORRYING!!!
Go ahead and start the DMP, either with Stepchange or PayPlan, or self managed if you feel up to it!
You can manage your plans by phone app if you want to keep the chance of Hubby finding something on a shared PC - I have the PayPlan app on my phone - it's really handy and all comms to and from are managed via the app. That's one of the advantages of using them, over self managed.
I hope that you experience the relief and peace that most of us here have, once you feel that you have made a start and start to view the debt in a different way. The companies you have a debt are businesses and will be sensible about your ability to pay (or not). Personally I have found Barclaycard and MBNA to be particularly supportive.
I wish you luck. Please ask for help when you need it. But most importantly don't worry and make yourself ill - it will be all ok.
Best wishes x

sourcrates

Moved to general DFW forum.

Willing2Learn

needtodothis2020 wrote: »

So I came onto here an have been reading through the various posts and from this my understanding is that:
A) I should start by cancelling all my direct debit repayments and let the accounts fall into default?
What I would have been paying put this aside to build up some funds?
C) After my accounts have all defaulted then go to Stepchange and set up a DMP?
Does this sound correct?

A) Yes
Yes
C) Yes, but your Statement of Affairs (SOA) needs to balance up for a DMP to work. Please complete your SOA and then post it all up into this thread so that we can take a look at it and advise accordingly. (Don't forget to click on the 'format for MSE' button near the bottom of the form).

Yes. Doing the above will cause you to be bombarded with letters and maybe phone calls. That always happens. But when you send out holding letters to all of your creditors, you should clearly state that you only consent to written correspondence via Royal Mail, and that all other methods of correspondence would be considered harassment.

Put together your realistic SOA and then you be able to approach your husband with both the problem and the solution. It isn't good to bottle it all up. It eats away at you....

needtodothis2020

Thankyou Purplepaws for your reply, you actually made me cry, mainly because today is the first step in admitting that i cannot go on as i am and as you said you are going through the same as me.
I have taken the first step and cancelled all of my direct debits :j now I need to wait for the barrage of phone calls and letters (this is the worst part incase hubby is home before me)
I will keep you updated and thanks for giving me hope that I can sort this

needtodothis2020

Thankyou Willing2Learn, I shall do that, I will only include in it what I earn and what I pay as my husbands finances are separate, we are not financially linked together as we do not have a joint bank account (we have in the past) and our mortgage is paid of.

I have taken the first step and have cancelled all my direct debits, do I send a template to all my creditors tomorrow or wait?
Many thanks for your help

Willing2Learn

needtodothis2020 wrote: »

I have taken the first step and have cancelled all my direct debits, do I send a template to all my creditors tomorrow or wait?

Yes. Use the letter template linked below. It asks for your accounts to be put on hold whilst you are seeking advice.
Holding Letter Click here

If you currently have an overdraft (in addition to the store card, credit card & catalogues), then I would recommend you having your wages from the college job paid into a brand new account. The new account should be with a banking group with whom you do not have any debts.

needtodothis2020

Luckily I do not have any debts with my bank and only have a £50 safety overdraft with them (TSB) does this mean that I can keep my bank account and do not have to switch?

Willing2Learn

That's good. If you don't owe any money to TSB (apart from using £50 overdraft facility occasionally), then yes, you can keep it. A switch-a-round is not needed...

needtodothis2020

Just to add, I am hoping that once I graduate I can either look for a new job or stay with the college and go full time in September and maybe have some scope for progress.

It just means the next 9 months or so are going to be really hard, I am more worried about all the letters I am going to receive and how on earth do I hide them all?
I cannot tell my husband that is not an option for me
Feeling very overwhelmed by it all but I know I have to do it for my own sanity
Thanks for listening

Willing2Learn

You won't be paying any bills?
Will your only commitments be to your creditors?
Is that correct?
[STRIKE]What about your petrol?
[/STRIKE]
I think you need to allocate some money toward 'entertainment'
I think you need to allocate some money toward 'haircuts' (I am assuming you are not all Sinead O'Connor)
If you are not telling your husband, then you may consider whether you need to allocate money towards 'presents'

I have to ask. But do you actually need the car? Or could you sell it and buy something cheaper?


Whether or not you can tell your husband your plans is up to you. But if it is effecting your moods, noticeably, then you may want to reconsider. Or he may read something into your changed behaviour...It really is good to talk...and to share....