Depressed and in urgent need for advice

DavidDAM

No, the mothers are not aware and I am not wanting them to find them.

These agreements were not done via the CMS and were privately done with them. I have assured both mothers I would cover missed child maintenance payments as soon as I find a job. One of them has started to say I won’t be able to see my kids unless this is sorted as she is struggling badly. She has been taking credit to survive and borrowing from friends and family.

I have been paying both exes the same amount for 3 years. I am not looking to increase payments, just sustain what has always been paid if possible.

fatbelly

I don't think anyone's going to be able to give you a definitive answer on how the OR will play this but I checked the Technical Manual and it does seem that they are guided by the CMS calculator.

If the OR does ask for their contact details then you should provide them. Most of your questions are around what they will consider reasonable expenditure. You will find useful information in he technical manual, even though it is a bit out of date

https://www.insolvencydirect.bis.gov.uk/technicalmanual/Ch25-36/Chapter31/part7/Introduction.htm

Andyjflet

benbay001 wrote: »

Renting a room rather than a whole property is a great way to cut living expenses whilst you get everything back on track.

I spent 4 years in shared accommodation and had a great time. No bills, no cleaning and people around to speak to if you want.

The least i paid was £400, the most was £550 (all bills included, in the south east)

A significant number of my housemates were middle aged if that is something that concerns you?

Likewise I rented a room in a large house, after divorce, at 43 years old and did it for 18 months to get back on track, I paid £350 all in and it helped me get back on my feet.

When the time was right I rented a lovely two bedroom flat near my children so that they could stay over as it wasn't really the right environment in the shared house.

DavidDAM

I wouldnt really be able to live in shared accommodation due to my disability and my current mental state of mind.

I also would want my children to visit regularly and they are all small. When my son is unwell and his mother needs to stay in hospital with him it is likely the kids will stay over with me for a day or two.

This makes living in a room in shared accommodation a non starter. I also will have the money to pay for a bigger place and everything I have read says that the official receiver can’t instruct me to move to a smaller accommodation if I require my own space.

DavidDAM

Hi fatbelly, thank you for your response.

I really don’t want them to find out so would feel very hesitant in providing their details to the official receiver. I don’t really understand why the official receiver would require them as I will giving all the information - completely correctly and as it is.

In terms of the link you shared - do they strictly abide by those figures or do they listen to different circumstances which could affect payment amounts.

Flyright

You have a duty to provide the Official Receiver with any information they require from you. It does seem that you have perhaps entered into bankruptcy without being fully aware of the implications. I would be very surprised if the Official Receiver allowed you to continue to pay the level of child maintenance that you currently do.

Given that you stated that debts arose due to gambling, I assume you are aware of the possibility that a BRO may be pursued against you by the Official Receiver.

fatbelly

Flyright wrote: »

Given that you stated that debts arose due to gambling, I assume you are aware of the possibility that a BRO may be pursued against you by the Official Receiver.

Which is another good reason for complying with any requests. Just to be clear - you have to provide any information they ask for. A third party cannot be forced to comply.

DavidDAM wrote: »

In terms of the link you shared - do they strictly abide by those figures or do they listen to different circumstances which could affect payment amounts.

It's the guidance they used to work to - it's now out of date. They use the Standard Financial Statement.

DavidDAM

You are right - I really didn’t understand all the implications involved in a Bankruptcy and was badly advised.

Is there any way that I can annul the bankruptcy - I don’t have the money to clear all my debts but could try and reach an arrangement with the creditors?

In terms of the child maintenance payments do you think the official receiver may try and find a middle ground? There are mitigating circumstances and it is important they are heard.

In regards to a BRO - I was made bankrupt in November and my OR has said they don’t require any further information from me at this stage. I have been very upfront about everything and provided evidence too. If a BRO was going to be applied, would it not have been applied by now?

I was also under the assumption that most of the time a BRO is placed if someone isn’t responsive to their OR or if they have been dishonest.

DavidDAM

@fatbelly - is there anywhere I can find the standard financial statement?

I have been complying with all of the requests from the OR and will continue to do so. I just don’t want anyone close to me knowing about my bankruptcy (unless they stumble upon it themselves), and under data protection law, I thought that I had a right for my information to be kept private?

ie - is the official receiver allowed to contact any prospective new employers without my consent?

fatbelly

In your present situation (not working, no income, no assets, living with family) you don't have a problem.

Assuming you had debts of several tens of thousands the advice to go bankrupt was understandable at that time.

I would say to take things one step at a time. Take the new job (if you are well enough to do so) and go from there.