Property Dilemma – What & Where?

DairyQueen

Mr DQ will retire within the next 15 months and we are planning a house move but we are struggling to decide to what extent we should accommodate future needs.

We are early 60s and the kind of property we would like bears no resemblance to somewhere fit for an 80+-year-old. Ideally, we wouldn’t move again but that would mean foregoing our property dream.

We have lots of options, Town/village/rural? How many storeys? Character/Modern? Easy to maintain or hell with that? Close to facilities/shops/hospital/station? Availability of public transport?

Our hearts hanker for character, rural, neighbours at a distance, a large garden, a view over fields or water. We want the kind of property that will be a maintenance nightmare and car-essential. In summary, a home from which a future move will be almost certain. Or, should we bite the bullet and use our heads? New bungalow? walking distance to services?

We feel that we should learn from our parents' experience. OH’s widowed mum stayed in the long-term family home, struggled for a decade, suffered falls and, eventually, in her late 80s, moved into residential care. The loss of that home was devastating for her at that age and providing support in the preceding years had been very difficult for her family as she lived so far from her children/grandchildren.

My parents dithered for so long that they missed the window during which they could cope reasonably well with a house move. This window seems to close around age 80 for most people.

I would be interested in others’ views/experiences. For example:
Older retirees: are you now facing a major upheaval because your home has become unmanageable? Do you wish you had chosen differently at a younger age?

Those in their 50s/60s: what are your housing plans? Do you intend moving only when necessary or will you pre-empt future needs now?

Spreadsheetman

Very interesting topic as DW and I are planning a retirement house move too in the next couple of years (both late 50s).

Your wishlist is quite similar to ours (detached, character, substantial garden) except I want easy+cheap maintenance and energy-efficient. Bungalow would be great, or a chalet bungalow or a house with more ground floor space than upstairs.

The locations we are looking at will need a car for most things, although having a village shop & pub in easy cycling distance is the ideal.

This really won't work in later life though and we have planned for a move in our mid-late 70s to a city flat with minimal maintenance and no garden. Plus walking distance or public transport to all facilities and a major hospital close by.

MankyVegSoup

I'm 57 and already starting to think about something lower maintenance (yesterday's leaky roof may have something to do with it). Mr MVS is younger - 51 - so we hopefully have plenty of time. Our plan is to downsize when OH retires (at 60 in the current plan). Rural and high maintenance is my nightmare! I'm hoping for seaside (so cliched) and close to lots cafes, restaurants and things to do.

But if you are both in good health and can afford it, I would be inclined to follow the dream but with the knowledge and intention that it will be for a limited time - say 10 years.

OldMusicGuy

We've given it a lot of thought over the last three years and are currently in the process of moving to our "final" home, that is the move after that will be small flat/care home/graveyard (not necessarily in that order and maybe at different times for both of us).

We had a 5 bed executive style home in the expensive South East. It was a lovely family home, we lived there for 20 years while our son grew up and went to uni. We stretched ourselves to buy it in 1999 so that we had an asset we could utilise in retirement - selling it and downsizing was always part of our long term financial planning.

We did think about moving to a smaller house in the same area but that would not release much equity, and now our son is living away and forging our own life we had no ties to the area. So we decided to move away to a cheaper area and also look to live in a small market town or reasonable sized village.

We have thought long and hard about it and have decided to go for a place where we are in walking distance of facilities. We are both 62, fit and active but know that we won't be so active in our 80s. We want to move now to a house that works for us now and when we are 80 plus. We have seen too many elderly relatives get stuck in houses that are too big for them which causes both stress and financial issues.

So we are buying a new build 4 bed chalet bungalow in a village of 3,500 in Somerset. It has two large bedrooms upstairs (both ensuite), 2 bedrooms downstairs and a family bathroom which we will get equipped with a walk-in shower. The plan is that we use the two downstairs bedrooms as hobby rooms for as long as possible and if/when we reach the point where one or both of us can't manage the stairs, we will move to the larger downstairs bedroom and we have a bathroom with walk-in shower for when we can't manage a bath.

The house is in a beautiful village with a pub, local butcher, greengrocers, really nice deli/cafe, Boots, Co-op, doctors, wine shop and some other independent businesses. All are within 5 to 10 minutes walk, yet our house is on the edge of the village overlooking fields and hills. It also has a thriving arts centre and has an annual folk festival.

We are currently in a rental property in a small village in Wiltshire which is very similar to the place we are moving to (it's a bit trendier and has some very cool independent shops). We have been here for two months and we absolutely love village life. We don't use the car much, we shop locally and everything we need is on our doorstep. It's also a great community here. So we have tested our plan for living in a village and know it is everything we hoped it would be. However, we are both very art/craft/hobby focused, so this type of place suits our mentality.

We both would have liked a character property. My wife does interior design and makes curtains and soft furnishings (and is currently doing an upholstery course). I'm pretty good at DIY, in my youth I completely restored two Victorian properties. However, I spent last year getting our existing house ready to sell and I realised that I can't get up ladders like I used to and I find intensive DIY tiring. So we were realistic and said no doer-uppers. Unless you are both really good at DIY or have loads of money to spend to pay other people to do it, I would say be very realistic about getting a character place. I am very pleased that in our new place I will never have to paint a window frame again!

My advice would be to buy a house in a village or market town with facilities nearby. You will really cut down on car use and you'll be supporting the local economy (rather than driving to supermarkets for "big shops" all the time). Everytime we watch "Escape to the Country" we see often quite unfit looking older people contemplating houses in the middle of nowhere and we always shout at the screen "how will you get to the shops when you are in your 80s!"

And to echo my old dad's advice, never buy a house near water. Nothing but trouble. Check your flood maps carefully.

Linton

DairyQueen wrote: »

We are early 60s and the kind of property we would like bears no resemblance to somewhere fit for an 80+-year-old. Ideally, we wouldn’t move again but that would mean foregoing our property dream.

We retired in our mid-50s and soon after moved to be nearer our increasingly elderly families. It was a necessity, but the problem with moving soon after retirement is that you dont know how your finances will work out. Having now moved again 10 years later we were able to buy a far more desirable house with confidence.

We have lots of options, Town/village/rural? How many storeys? Character/Modern? Easy to maintain or hell with that? Close to facilities/shops/hospital/station? Availability of public transport?

I would say modern, easy to maintain house in a large village with facilities or within walking distance of the centre of a small to medium sized town. Two storeys gives you much more choice, well sized bungalows are rare and expensive. Make sure the stairs are sufficiently wide to accommodate a stairlift if really necessary. There should be a station and hospital within say 10 miles so you can use a taxi.

Our hearts hanker for character, rural, neighbours at a distance, a large garden, a view over fields or water. We want the kind of property that will be a maintenance nightmare and car-essential. In summary, a home from which a future move will be almost certain. Or, should we bite the bullet and use our heads? New bungalow? walking distance to services?

Use your heads, at least for your final move. Transport is a major problem in many villages and you are likely to spend some of your retirement without a car. Out in the countryside or in a small village you could be very lonely having lost the daily social interaction of work. Get a modern well-insulated house which simple maintenance needs.


A large garden sounds lovely but consider the practicalities. You dont want it to interfere with world cruises or whatever, and its ongoing maintenance could turn into a chore. Will you be able to afford a gardener?

We feel that we should learn from our parents' experience. OH’s widowed mum stayed in the long-term family home, struggled for a decade, suffered falls and, eventually, in her late 80s, moved into residential care. The loss of that home was devastating for her at that age and providing support in the preceding years had been very difficult for her family as she lived so far from her children/grandchildren.

My parents dithered for so long that they missed the window during which they could cope reasonably well with a house move. This window seems to close around age 80 for most people.

Yes you do need to make a well considered final move. I would put the closing of the opportunity at much earlier than 80. At 70 I would not want to go through the stress of finding and buying a house again.

I would be interested in others’ views/experiences. For example:
Older retirees: are you now facing a major upheaval because your home has become unmanageable? Do you wish you had chosen differently at a younger age?

I am very confident that we made the right decisions.

Malthusian

Don't grow old before you need to. The sooner you stop walking up stairs the sooner you won't be able to.

My parents moved into the kind of house you want c. 10 years ago. ("character, rural, neighbours at a distance, a large garden, a view over fields or water".) Dad was early 60s and Mum mid 50s. 10 years on they are giving it up and planning to move back to civilisation (in Somerset - but I repeat myself), probably a village a few miles away from the city, with easy access to shops and other services, and much closer to family. A much smaller and easier to maintain house.

I am fairly sure there is absolutely no way in hell that, given the choice of altering history, they would have given up the last ten years in Exmoor and the memories they made there, to save themselves the bother of an extra house move today.

Go with your hearts. Absolute no-brainer. You're only in your early 60s once. If you take the safe option and regret it ten years from now, it's not going to be practical to move to the place in the country.

The lesson of your mum is to not dither when the time comes, not to make premature choices 10 years before it has.

Queenriderbrekke

Personally it depends on your finances and your health, if these allow I would go for the house you have always wanted even if it means you do have to move at a later date to a retirement home:)

MallyGirl

We don't plan to move for the first decade or so of retirement. House is large, Victorian (aka high maintenance and expensive to heat) and has a reasonable size garden and off street parking for 2 cars and camper.
At a later date we can make life easier but initially we want to be able to easily go into local town or London for entertainment. We really like the house.

My Dad retired to a big Victorian pile in Dorset which needed a lot of work. 7 beds and 9 acres for 2 of them and 2 cats. He thought his kids (2nd family) would come and bring their friends to stay so he built a tennis court despite having had 2 new ankles and a new knee himself - instead the 'kids' all moved to Australia/NZ.
He (74) has just sold up to move to a more practical house (or it will be when they have gutted it) with a very much smaller garden right next to the beach. I suspect that they regret moving somewhere so big last time but they wanted the space to be surrounded by family - it just didn't work out that way.
Mum (now 71) retired to a bigger house in Devon with a very steep garden and an equally steep long drive - they have to pay a gardener and use the car to get the bins to the bottom of the drive. It is also in the middle of nowhere. They will need to move again - husband's health is not great and it is not a place for someone to live on their own. They have been there and enjoyed it for 10 years though and their future needs are not the same as they would have wanted to cater for/be restricted by in their 60s. For them this was the right way to go.

atush

We are approaching your age and choice.

We are going bungalow and near to town/services as we have been living way out in the country for the last 22 years.

Will be nice to walk to the pub again lol

Clive_Woody

You get one shot at life (assuming you aren't a Buddhist) and sometimes you have to be impulsive.

Being sensible is jolly admirable, but sometimes you should go with your heart. If you get into the mentality of I'm preparing to die (or become old and infirm) then you start behaving that way and these things can be self fulfilling.

Go with what feels right and makes you happy.

Linton

The house isnt the be all and end all of one's retirement. In our case we bought a boat on which we like to spend as much of the warmer part of the year as possible and have cruised over most of the canal system since retiring. We also travel widely abroad. Those provide the memories. The house is a hassle-free base and somewhere warm and comfortable during the winter but also will enable us to spend the rest of our days there well after the time when we no longer wish to travel. Hopefully a care home will never be necessary.

On the other hand if your house is your life and expect to spend almost all your time there then you will have different requirements. But for me having to spend 2 hours mowing the lawn every week would be a prison sentance.