Nosey Ex..

es5595

I mean, I approve of the “give him something to find”.

How about getting a video camera to catch him in the act? A canary/nest/ring or something similar? Ideally slightly hidden so he’s not aware.

Is your relationship with him mum still cordial? How about knocking on her door and ask to go snooping about his bedroom. Then when she asks why, explain he’s been doing exactly that to your bedroom. And follow up with an email of the video file.

Then I’d suggest speaking to your solicitor, providing them the video, and asking for them to send a “cease and desist” type letter.

All the posters saying “sell the house” you appear to have missed the OP stating the house is currently on the market! Although given the current state of the market, unless she wants to initiate a fire sale, it will take a while.

paddyz

Buy a chest with a lock on it, and I’d also buy a spy camera and check out what’s he’s actually doing too, even though his actions are wrong I think he is just looking for signs you are having your new partner over, as he is paying half the mortgage he might just be looking for a reason to stop paying etc

Sell the house ASAP and this will all be over and both can get on with life

xpf

I'm in a similar situation - Ex was coming round when he knew I wouldn't be in. He even went ratching under the mattress for paperwork! I started taking photos of the positioning of items to double check if anything had moved and of course they had.

I've now installed 2 wifi cameras that I can view from my mobile phone and records any movement within range. They only cost about £30 each and have been enough of a deterrent to stop him from doing so.

https://www.ezvizlife.com/uk/product/hd-indoor-cam/805

heladofresa

My partner is in this situation currently, from the offer perspective. He paid half the mortgage on the flat for a few years after he moved out. He still technically co-owns the flat due to their never-ending divorce.
In any case - before and after - he would not dream of going into the house to go through her things - it is completely disrespectful and bullying behaviour to do so. The fact that he is on the mortgage is because the are kids there and my partner likewise remained as such.
Can you install a WiFi / hard drive backup camera to monitor this?
It’s totally within your right to protect your personal space and what he is doing is trying to prevent you from moving on.

badmemory

My ex (30 years ago now) used to come in without warning. Luckily I knew he didn't have a back door key as we had never really used it. We had 2 other doors though. I eventually solved the problem by always leaving a key, slightly turned, in those 2 locks & using the back door. I told him one of the neighbours had someone gain entry by using the third (via the garage) door. OK a lie but it stopped him & that was the important thing! Security/safety is vital for your & indeed anyones peace of mind. I have not regretted that lie for one single second of the last 30 years even though I do obviously remember it. I did similar to my mother too when my son caught her reading my post. I caught her doing similar to my sister a couple of years later. Sister changed her locks!