Probation and gross misconduct

Rbb

First time poster,but long time reader of all your posts!
My partner has recently started a new job with a pretty big well known company,where he is being trained to do the job on the job (something he has never done before).Yesterday he was obviously frustrating his work mate by not being quick enough for him where this guy started shouting at him calling him thick etc and then throwing a piece of equipment towards him (it did not hit him). My partner suffers from PTSD which they are aware of and obviously finds it hard to control his emotions and at the end of their shift he walked out telling his boss he was done with it all as he was not being spoken to like that.
I am totally expecting the outcome to be dismissal as he is in probation period.
So of this is the outcome as a family we have a child of 6 how are we supposed to survive on my wages I work only 20 hrs a week (sometimes more if any available) on minimum wage,its christmas and in all honesty I do not think my partner is able to keep a job down with all his mental health problems he really has no control of his emotions,anger or people skills. It's not the first time something like this has happened and a new job was supposed to be a fresh start but I guess you cant just stick a sticking plaster on things.

74jax

OK breathe.

It's Christmas, you have kids, and everything with your partner on your plate.

Facts are, you work part time and your partner has walked out on a job. Are you able to work full time and he look after the children? It's Christmas, where I am jobs for over the season are advertised all the time. Can you take anything to work around your part time role?

Regarding walking out on a job and benefits, including help with ptsd someone much more qualified will be along to advise.

Rbb

I do get extra hours at work if they are there, I love my job and it works well as I can take my daughter with me as it's in a setting looking after children.When my partner is ill he can barely look after himself let alone look after a child so that really not an option for me as I would not feel comfortable putting her in that situation she is 6.
Thank you for your reply.

kanosam

Yesterday he was obviously frustrating his work mate by not being quick enough for him where this guy started shouting at him calling him thick etc and then throwing a piece of equipment towards him (it did not hit him).

It should be that guy who loses his job not your partner.., he can't get away with throwing equipment at another employee.

end of their shift he walked out telling his boss he was done with it all as he was not being spoken to like that.

were there any witnesses?
there should be CCTV evidence also.
i would go back and report the incident.

[Deleted User]

Get him to go near an agency/apply to anything
There is 4 weeks still in the lead up to Xmas.

One year I walked out last week of Nov from a 9 month FTC which was just miserable, no regrets what happened. 1st Dec accepted a temp job (following on from a permanent job interviewed for in the Oct but which offered itself as temp for Christmas) started work 4th December for 3 weeks with a courier company while I got something else sorted for the future might only have been another 9 month FTC but hope was there. Christmas wasn't ruined that year. 3 weeks of 5.30am starts were nothing.

All the best.

Savvy_Sue

kanosam wrote: »

there should be CCTV evidence also.

Why? We have no information on where this job was being carried out, but even if it was at the employer's premises there is no 'should' about it. There MAY be CCTV evidence.

Blatchford

Rbb wrote: »

First time poster,but long time reader of all your posts!
My partner has recently started a new job with a pretty big well known company,where he is being trained to do the job on the job (something he has never done before).Yesterday he was obviously frustrating his work mate by not being quick enough for him where this guy started shouting at him calling him thick etc and then throwing a piece of equipment towards him (it did not hit him). My partner suffers from PTSD which they are aware of and obviously finds it hard to control his emotions and at the end of their shift he walked out telling his boss he was done with it all as he was not being spoken to like that.
I am totally expecting the outcome to be dismissal as he is in probation period.
So of this is the outcome as a family we have a child of 6 how are we supposed to survive on my wages I work only 20 hrs a week (sometimes more if any available) on minimum wage,its christmas and in all honesty I do not think my partner is able to keep a job down with all his mental health problems he really has no control of his emotions,anger or people skills. It's not the first time something like this has happened and a new job was supposed to be a fresh start but I guess you cant just stick a sticking plaster on things.

So how do they know he has "walked out" - he didn't tell them, he "walked out" at the end of his shift, and it's Saturday (a chance that he isn't due in work today???). If he simply goes back to work on Monday, how do they know anything at all?

Either way, it strikes me that there is nothing lost in having a conversation with them. They already know he has PTSD. Can he not reasonably and sensibly explain what happened, how this sort of thing affects him, and try to find a way in which he and the employer can find a solution - bearing in mind that he has to offer as much if not more towards that solution than the employer. So far, worst case scenario is that he's missed a day at work. Best case, they haven't noticed anything yet. So it may be "fixable".

And I'm not going to tell him to pull himself together. I understand that PTSD is a debilitating condition, etc., etc. But I am going to say that he needs to work harder at finding a way of working through solutions and getting support to find what strategies will help him. Your 20 hours a week, with maybe a few more hours, are not going to sustain a family. If he has no other motivation than supporting his child and being an effective role model, then that ought to be more than enough to motivate him. Regrettably there are no magic cures, and he beats it or it beats him.

kanosam

My partner has recently started a new job with a pretty big well known company,where he is being trained to do the job on the job

Savvy_sue,
i know what you mean, i should have said "MAY be" but with it being a pretty big well known company, i just assumed they would have CCTV.

no work mate can get away with calling someone thick and throwing equipment in their direction. i would find out if there was a witness and report the incident.

Dox

kanosam wrote: »

Savvy_sue,

no work mate can get away with calling someone thick and throwing equipment in their direction.

You've led a very sheltered life if you think that! Depending on the environment, it's an everyday occurrence for many people and they take it in their stride. For someone with PTSD, it's an entirely different situation and they are very unlikely to be able to cope with it.

As OP has said: 'I do not think my partner is able to keep a job down with all his mental health problems he really has no control of his emotions,anger or people skills. It's not the first time something like this has happened ...'.

Reporting the incident isn't going to help anything - what would it achieve that wouldn't increase the stress levels for the PTSD sufferer and his partner? It won't help him cope and won't result in some sort of payout (or at least only a tiny one). It sounds as if he needs professional medical support and probably his poor partner does too.

As for Christmas - OP, please read this and see if anything might help cut the costs in a way you and he would find acceptable: https://www.moneysavingexpert.com/shopping/christmas-savings/

KiKi

Blatchford wrote: »

So how do they know he has "walked out" - he didn't tell them, he "walked out" at the end of his shift, and it's Saturday (a chance that he isn't due in work today???). If he simply goes back to work on Monday, how do they know anything at all?

The OP says in her first post that he told his boss he was done with it all.

Rbb

His job involves working in different area s basically labouring shall we say ( I dont want to expose any more than that).so no CCTV. He walked out when he got back to depot still angry from what had happened unable to control himself he took himself out of situation...looking back he knows it was wrong thing to do bit when you have PTSD you do tend to think irrationally.He has been told to come in monday afternoon for a meeting with boss and he is suspended until then.
My 20 hrs no way can support us and agency work will be the way forward I guess for him.
I guess I just needed to vent somewhere and see if anyone else has a similar life to ours regarding mental health issues it's a constant roller coaster with little or no help from mental health teams.