Realising the dream

PollyWollyDoodle

It’s absolutely normal, Lifeofdreams. I really struggled with the fact that I was giving up a profession that I had trained long and hard to do, even though I didn’t enjoy my job any more I wondered about who I would be when I gave it up.

It takes time to adjust, and for me it’s been very important to have some structure to my days. I’m self-employed so I can pick and choose my hours to some extent, but I always make sure I’m up and dressed by 9 am; I try and build exercise into my day, and I have a couple of leisure activities that get me out of the house even if I’m not working.

One problem I found was that most of my friends still work full time and so aren’t available for visiting during the day. It’s early days, you will discover new routines. I have definitely slowed down a lot, but on the whole I think that’s a good thing.

Lifeofdreams

Dear boultdj and PollWollydoode thank you for the supportive responses. I am certainly learning to appreciate the simple pleasures more. I have just been our for a walk and marvelled at the beauty of the countryside where I live despite the thick fog!

Itbis reassuring to be told the transition and identity crisis is a normal part of the adjustment. I have wondered about self-employment but would not know where to start so again any pointers would be very useful.

I had thought being able to work part_time through an agency and also offering another service via self_employment may be the ways forward but not sure how this would work?

So many things to consider. I will need to have some form of paid work and have just updated CV for circulation. I am however mindful that I do not want to return back to my original situation where there was no time, I also want some flexibility is it to big an ask?

Apologies for all of the questions and my rambles��

boultdj

Self employment is not for everyone, so your right for thinking is agency an option, but in saying that, self employment is the best thing I've done for my health. In saying that, my friend is agency worker and get's paid quite a bit more than the regular staff, so swing's and roundabouts.
Which ever one you do you need contact's and a willingness to put yourself forward, but both also bring the worry of what happens when I'm ill, a family emergency arises or will I earn enough to pay all the bill's. Hope that help's a bit Lifeofdreams. boult

PollyWollyDoodle

I had already identified a S/E opportunity and was all set up before I left my full-time work. It was a huge gamble however, as I didn’t know whether I would be able to get enough work to cover the bills. It’s taken a while, but I’m now in my fifth year and things are going well. I don’t earn a huge amount, but it’s enough to live on comfortably and all I ever wanted was to bridge the gap between full-time work and being able to draw my pension.

I have also had a part-time zero hours contract, which has come to an end and I’m not that sorry. Look around, maybe take something part time so you have some income while you look for other opportunities. Once you are free to make choices, it’s surprising what is out there.

Look at your “transferable skills”, I don’t know your background but admin, budgeting experience, presentation skills, writing reports, customer focus - you will have lots of stuff that can be applied to different jobs.

You might find that arranging and going to a few interviews, or just tidying up your CV, will give you some focus as to what you would like to do.

VfM4meplse

Mistral001 wrote: »

However, I found that many of the conversations I had with friends and family had to change. Swapping stories about holidays, the best places to eat out or anything to do with consumer spending became very one-way. You have to do a lot of listensing and not much talking.

There is that, but eventually the conversation turns to more meaningful things (by that I means years and not weeks).

Taking that step back and deciding not to trade in my remaining good years for an all-consuming "career" was life-changing for me: I'd paid back my financial debt to society and now feel happy, healthy and balanced instead of constantly stressed out (which I didn't even realise I was, at the time). I'd be quite happy reading, listening to R4 / WS and sipping coffee for the rest of my life and I find it quite hard to entertain inane conversations. I have been gradually withdrawing - not attending meals, "experiences" etc that I am going to get little pleasure from, preferring to meet for coffee or a drink, or entertain at home - this year I just bit the bullet and said I've planned my goals for this year, but got no money for luxuries so please don't be offended when I decline. I particularly dislike getting dragged into other people's extravagant birthday celebrations when it means relinquishing control over my planned expenditure.

You're right, the simple things really do count. I can't imagine life without regular walks on the beach, or in pleasant public spaces, or enjoying nature. none of which cost a great deal but have improved my quality of life infinitely.

gt568

VfM4meplse wrote: »

There is that, but eventually the conversation turns to more meaningful things (by that I means years and not weeks).

Taking that step back and deciding not to trade in my remaining good years for an all-consuming "career" was life-changing for me: I'd paid back my financial debt to society and now feel happy, healthy and balanced instead of constantly stressed out (which I didn't even realise I was, at the time). I'd be quite happy reading, listening to R4 / WS and sipping coffee for the rest of my life and I find it quite hard to entertain inane conversations. I have been gradually withdrawing - not attending meals, "experiences" etc that I am going to get little pleasure from, preferring to meet for coffee or a drink, or entertain at home - this year I just bit the bullet and said I've planned my goals for this year, but got no money for luxuries so please don't be offended when I decline. I particularly dislike getting dragged into other people's extravagant birthday celebrations when it means relinquishing control over my planned expenditure.

You're right, the simple things really do count. I can't imagine life without regular walks on the beach, or in pleasant public spaces, or enjoying nature. none of which cost a great deal but have improved my quality of life infinitely.

What an inspiring and beautiful post.:T