Work Related Stress - What are my options?

Itsjustsammy19

Thank you for all the replies. I totally hear what you are saying and I know I've built a rod for my own back but I don't like letting my employers or customers down. I work really hard but I'm beginning to feel like they are taking the P now. I was meant to have a meeting with senior boss yesterday as my own boss is on holiday but they never got back to me, I emailed them last night and asked when the meeting would be rescheduled but they never replied (I am out on a customer visit today). I feel the final straw came this week when my boyfriend told me yesterday he had been feeling unwell since Sunday but I was so bloody wrapped up in work to notice :-(
My HR department are notoriously rubbish and they won't help.
I haven't handed my notice in but if I did then I would have to give 2 months notice.

I guess my main concern (apart from my health) is having to explain why I was signed off sick to my next employer. Some will be understanding but others may see it differently.

Itsjustsammy19

I will just add as well that I can't be too hard on my manager as he is recovering from cancer

Brynsam

Itsjustsammy19 wrote: »

I will just add as well that I can't be too hard on my manager as he is recovering from cancer

That's a laudable sentiment (truly), but making yourself ill in the process is plain stupid.

You are the one who is letting this situation continue. While you go on 'coping', management has no reason to do anything. If you continue to play along, nothing will change, except you'll get more resentful.

Ever thought of doing a bit of assertiveness training? Local authorities often run courses (frequently no more than a day, or even just half a day) at modest rates and it could transform your outlook.

Smodlet

... And how much is your manager trading on "recovering from cancer". At the end of the day, that is his/her issue, not yours. Is he/she going to care when you collapse from over-work? Well, then.

I don't care how callous that sounds: Cancer, just like any other illness, is a personal thing and certainly not employees' (or, immediate family excepted, anyone else's) problem.

P.S. Don't shoot me down in flames (or do, I don't care) I am in a position to say this.

FBaby

I've been exactly where you are OP. This is what I'd recomand you do. Tell your manager you need to have a formal meeting with them asap. During the meeting, explain that you have no choice but to raise the issue of your workload. Say 5hst you understand that they've had difficulty recruiting someone else permanently and that you were happy to help as much as you can but sadly, due to the extended time, you are now suffering from health problems due to the overload.

Explain what these are. Say that the last thing you want to do is go off sick but you've reached the point where you just can't do it anymore and it is a question of days if not hours rather than week before you have no choice but go off sick.

If they are showing sympathy, ask him to agree that you will only work your normal hours and you'll clarify in an email wajt couldn't be done. If they is not understanding, or act like they are but nothing changes, go off sick.

Have no contact for 2/3 weeks and afterwards, ask to meet to discuss again how to ensure you can come back and not find yourself back ill. If this still doesn't work, go off sick again and look for another job.

Marcon

Itsjustsammy19 wrote: »

I will just add as well that I can't be too hard on my manager as he is recovering from cancer

It's not a question of being 'hard' on your manager; it's a question of working out which problems are for you to deal with - and his illness isn't one of them. It is, however, a marvellous excuse for you not to tackle what is making you ill. Sort out your own health issues before assuming responsibility for someone else's. Posting here isn't going to resolve anything unless you take some definitive action - and that isn't easy but needs to be done.

London50

All we can do as strangers on a forum is advise as to what we think/know from our own situations and only you and you alone will make a final judgement.
you can come up with a thousand reasons to carry on but you IMO need to use the one reason to stop and that is YOU and how YOU are being affected,both at this time and in the future. Do you honestly think that {should the worst happen to you while you work there} they will have any pity?? You know they will not, your job will be advertised and another will take the position you hold.
There is such thing as work life balance and we all need it.Please if not for the people on here that have given advise but more important for your family and friends think for your own wellbeing.

Itsjustsammy19

Thank you for the replies. I have been communicating with my boss over the past 5 months about the workload, at one point he was asking if I can organise myself better (this was a bit insulting as I've always demonstrated how organised I was since I started). Nearly 2 weeks ago I told him about feeling unwell because of stress and pressure. He responded saying it was out of his hands and he doesn't know what the senior bosses have planned but asked me to send over my workload. I spoke to senior boss briefly on Monday and explained that it was affecting my health. She said that her and another senior boss would sit with me and discuss my concerns yesterday and that never happened. I asked yesterday when the meeting was being rearranged for and they didn't respond.
I have made an appointment with a doctor next week. I will explain how I'm feeling to him and see what he thinks I should do (either be signed off or drug myself up on painkillers)

Smodlet

Or get a sense of proportion and listen to the advice on here. Take control.

Itsjustsammy19

Oh I am listening :-). I'm not going to work more than I should be doing now, no matter what the outcome of the doctors is, and I'm going to start putting me and my life first. I am updating my CV this weekend and start applying for jobs