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Choosing Hairstyles

edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in Weddings & Anniversaries
2 replies 4.4K views
DootsyDootsy Forumite
1 posts
edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in Weddings & Anniversaries
Hi all,

I'm a bridesmaid (there's me and one other) and we are off with the Bride to have our hair and makeup trial soon. I thought we would be able to kind of choose ourselves what we wanted, but bride showed me a picture (Just one) of what she thinks will be nice for us.

It's a kind of up-do, like a messy bun but sits low at the back. It looks pretty on the model in the picture, but I never wear my hair up as I think it doesn't really suit me that much. I much prefer having it down.
I have quite long hair (middle of my back length) and the other bridesmaid has slightly longer than shoulder-length, so not too sure if it's something that would look right/the same for both of us.

Bride hasn't said that we have to have that style, but she hasn't said we can pick ourselves either, so not sure how it will go. I do get have the impression she wants us to both be exactly the same though, for example: with the bridesmaid dresses, they are low back and I was struggling to find a bra option for larger bust that was supportive and felt secure (other bridesmaid has a smaller bust so useing stick-ons). I was saying about perhaps the seamstress could add an extra section to cover the bra strap at the back but she basically said she didn't want that because it would then be different. (After a lot of searching and trying on I did finally find one (Wasn't cheap!), it's not very comfortable but will do the job for the day.

Just wondering on people's thoughts around this? I was thinking maybe I could pick out some style I like to take with me on the day to suggest to try that are more half up half down or something?


  • PollycatPollycat Forumite
    29.4K posts
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Savvy Shopper!
    If you're going to be a bridesmaid, I'd guess you know the bride pretty well...
    Well enough to have a frank conversation about what she expects hair-wise.
    TBH, it would have been the perfect opportunity when she showed you the picture.

    I don't see the harm in taking a photo with you to the appointment but the style you like may not suit the other bridesmaid.
    And the bride may really be intransigent about how she wants her bridesmaids to look.
  • DD265DD265 Forumite
    2K posts
    Ninth Anniversary 1,000 Posts Name Dropper
    If the bride is paying for your hair then it's probably reasonable that she has a say. If she's not paying then she could make a suggestion but not demand.

    I agree that if you're close enough to be a bridesmaid, that you should be able to talk to her about this. I'd definitely take a photo to the apointment anyway!
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