Keeping on the Straight and Narrow...

DancingInTheRain

I've been signed off work until the end of the month which is a relief and in the last day or 2 I have started to feel a little less anxious and a little more level headed which is putting me in a better position to think clearly and I have decided to make a flexible working request to see if I can finish work at 230 each day instead of 530. Being able to do the school runs myself and give my full attention to the children on the days I don't have any after school childcare would relieve so much stress that I think it's at least worth an ask. 

Of course my employer may say no but there are examples of other, more senior colleagues, who have asked for flexibility and got it so it's definitely worth a try. I already had annual leave scheduled for the first week in August so hopefully a good break and a plan of attack for moving forward will help ease the pressure and reduce the anxiety. Having spoken informally with my line manager she's given me a lot of reassurances that there's no pressure on me to rush back and support is there when/if I return, there may also be an option for a phased return to work so I might even be able to start back on reduced hours straight away, will get in touch next week to discuss more formally as I am trying to really fully consider my options rather than making rushed decisions.

The children are now off school for the summer, on Thursday I took them out for the day to a town a bit further away so they could go to a big toy shop, they enjoyed spending some of their pocket money while I treated us to lunch. We also got a few items we needed from Pr!mark and then found a soft play so they spent an hour in there before we headed home, we had a really good day & it was lovely for us to do something positive together as I've been quite a grumpy/emotional Mummy the last few weeks.

Today my Mum is treating my nieces and I to afternoon tea so that's something to look forward to, we are also getting some new bedroom furniture delivered for the boys today so DH & I will be building that over the weekend so the children can finally have their bedroom back, it's been a long time coming.

savingholmes

A lot of positives in that. Good your GP listened and was supportive. Good to have some time to think. Good to have a boss you can talk to and explore options with. It was very full on when you went from being off with the kids to being full on back at work. As you say - during those early years with the kids - you need support whether that's paid or family. What you are proposing sounds a great solution if you can get it.

beanielou

REally hope you can get things to work in a way that works best for you & your family.

DancingInTheRain

So I've been advised that the reduced hours aren't an option due to business need which I anticipated due to the amount of travel needed on some days (it's specified in my contract) as some locations I go to are 2-2.5hrs away. Dropping a day a week is an option though so need to give that some thought but this seems the best option for now while keeping an eye on the local jobs market. There's always the option of handing my notice in if it's still too much, that in itself takes a bit of pressure off too.

Have annual leave booked next week, it's been scheduled a while so won't be back in work until the following week, going to be working alongside my manager for a chunk of the week so I've got some support to catch up on what's been happening while I've been off.

At home we got some new furniture for the boys which has meant I've sorted through the boys clothes and slimmed down their wardrobes as well as packing away their school uniforms until September. The boys have sorted through their books and toys in their bedroom and we've taken everything that's outgrown/no longer played with or read to the charity shop.

Their old bedroom furniture is being donated to a friend of a friend whose daughter and partner need to furnish a full house ahead of their baby being born in 3 months so that will hopefully help them out as well as saving us a tip run!

Have also sorted our understairs cupboard which is where we store board games, jigsaws, arts & crafts so it's now better organised. Have one more toy storage unit in the family living room to sort through and that's their stuff all done. The boys have enjoyed playing with some forgotten about toys so that's filled a bit of time in the last couple of days.

Looking after my friend's son tomorrow, weather forecast not looking good so may psyche myself up to take them all to a soft play session to let them burn off a bit of energy 🙂

Pay day Friday and the budget has held up well. The boys are going for a sleepover at their Aunty & Uncle's house so DH has booked us an early evening meal at a local restaurant so a nice little date to look forward to 😊

beanielou

Enjoy your date night

If you dropped a day I hope they would not expect you to still do the work of 5 days.

savingholmes

Hope you start to feel better soon. 

Dropping a day sounds a good intermediate option.

DancingInTheRain

Well the request to reduce my days has been submitted, fingers crossed it's approved. 
Thursday was hectic looking after my friend's son but thankfully the weather was dry in the afternoon so got them outside to the playground to burn off some energy, popped in to L!dl on the way home for some ice creams for us all too.
DH and I had a lovely meal last night, it was a Greek restaurant so ordered mezzes and got to try and enjoy a wide range of starters, mains and desserts - we were both stuffed by the end of the meal!
The boys enjoyed their 'sleepover', not a lot of sleep happened as they had a late night/early morning due to the excitement of being with their cousins so we've had a lazy Saturday as they're so tired, early night on the cards for them...

beanielou

Positive thoughts your way. 

savingholmes

Glad you had a lovely day night. Good luck to finding a balance that works for you.

DancingInTheRain

End of month update:

"What We Owe The World"
Mortgage balance £65,700
Credit Card balance £5,500 (smaller reduction this month due to balance transfer fees)
Student Loan balance £0
Total: £71,200

Savings
EF: £500
Additional Borrowing for Renovations: £16,320
Total: £16,820

July plans/focus:
Get the kids to the end of term (they break up for 7 weeks on the 19th) - done 
Sort out childcare with our Mums on the days we can't juggle work/annual leave - done
Plan activities for holidays - done
Stock up on snacks for the holidays - done
Kids bedroom decorated and carpeted - done
Front garden sorted - partially done, new wall is up, garden still needs terraced, looking much better though
Watch DH play with his band in a local festival - done
Attend a few local free family fun days, keep spends down! - done
DH and I have a date night to see a band at a local venue -done
Save some money instead of spending it all!!! - done

Not a bad month in terms of achieving goals despite having an awful flare up of anxiety. Unexpected goals were to find methods of dealing with this and putting plans in place to move forward i the coming weeks/months

August plans/focus:
Take one day at a time
Breath
Try to relax more

We have also booked a holiday for next summer so that's a longer term goal to look forward to and pay for!