Cancelling a children's isa due to change in circumstances

Sunflowerpower

My husband is estranged from his daughter and has been for a number of years. My husbands parents set up a children's ISA for when their granddaughter reaches 18. However my husband does not want his parents to pass on the money to her due to the estranged circumstances. The daughter has no contact with the grandparents either. The building society are adamant that legally the money has to go to the child on 18. And the only way you can cancel is upon a death of the child. This seems ridiculous as people's circumstances change. It is against my husband's wishes that the grandparents want to pass on the money. Is there anything that can be done?

cattie

First of all it has nothing to do with your husband, the isa was opened by the child's grandparents for the benefit of the daughter.

My ex husband didn't have contact with our son once he left us with no support whatsoever. Had he tried to block the savings account that we had set up for our son, I think I'd seriously have considered him the absolute lowest of the low.

Your husband is harbouring bitterness towards a child he brought into the world & I find that so very sad. When you have children the love parents have for them is usually unconditional & even if estranged, most parents would want nothing more than happiness & security for them. All children manage to hurt their parents in one way or another during their younger lives, but it's wrong to hold it against them for the rest of their lives.

bowlhead99

If the child is terminally ill, the funds can be removed prior to age of 18, to be spent for their benefit. Otherwise the child can control the funds from the age of 16 and access at 18.

The money does belong to the child. It is not the parent's money to "pass on" or not. It's in the child's account and has been since it was first deposited. The grandparents already gave it to the child. They are not your husband's funds to give away.

The child, on attaining age 18, is a rational and clear thinking adult. You should speak to them at age 18 and explain your clear and logical reasons why they should gift some of their money to their estranged grandparents. If they agree with those reasons, I'm sure they will be more than willing to comply.

Perhaps you think they will not be willing to comply because they think you and your husband are not behaving rationally and they do not want to turn down the useful gift. Or perhaps you think they won't comply because despite being age 18 they lack mental capacity to think for themselves what is appropriate in the circumstances. However, if they're really mentally impaired, it seems particularly cruel to be wanting to take money away from them.

The building society is acting in the best interests of the account beneficiary. Your husband is acting contrary to the best interests of the account beneficiary by saying her money should be taken away from her. Your husband is the one that would lose in court.

If your husband would prefer his parents to have £x that they no longer have since they gave it to their grandchild, he is free to reimburse them from his own pocket.

gingercordial

Sunflowerpower wrote: »

It is against my husband's wishes that the grandparents want to pass on the money.

Is it against the grandparents' wishes too? Or just your husband wanting to do this?

In any case the money was a gift to the child and cannot be taken back.

FatherAbraham

Sunflowerpower wrote: »

My husband is estranged from his daughter and has been for a number of years. My husbands parents set up a children's ISA for when their granddaughter reaches 18. However my husband does not want his parents to pass on the money to her due to the estranged circumstances. The daughter has no contact with the grandparents either. The building society are adamant that legally the money has to go to the child on 18. And the only way you can cancel is upon a death of the child. This seems ridiculous as people's circumstances change. It is against my husband's wishes that the grandparents want to pass on the money. Is there anything that can be done?

The money became the child's when it was given, not when she reaches majority.

It would be "ridiculous" if money given to someone could later be retrospectively taken away from the recipient.

In any case, your husband is not even a party to the transaction between grandparents and grand-daughter.

A parent who uses his control of his child's accounts to financially damage the child is abusing that power in the eyes of the law, and may be sued for damages by the child. A parent or guardian has a duty to act in best interest of his child.

Sea_Shell

Wow, I've read everything now!!!

Seriously, I know families can fall out over money/gifts/deposits/inheritance etc. But to want to screw over your own child/grandchild, that takes the biscuit!!!

Luckily, like others have pointed out, the money is legally the child's and the father and GPs can go whistle!!

gingercordial

cattie wrote: »

My ex husband didn't have contact with our son once he left us with no support whatsoever. Had he tried to block the savings account that we had set up for our son, I think I'd seriously have considered him the absolute lowest of the low.

Your husband is harbouring bitterness towards a child he brought into the world & I find that so very sad. When you have children the love parents have for them is usually unconditional & even if estranged, most parents would want nothing more than happiness & security for them. All children manage to hurt their parents in one way or another during their younger lives, but it's wrong to hold it against them for the rest of their lives.

I find this really sad too. The child cannot be older than 17 as it's clear from the question that the building society hasn't handed her control of the ISA yet. They have been estranged for "a number of years" so she can't have been older than 14 when that happened.

For a child of no more than 14 to become fully estranged from a parent... if by choice of the child that must have been because the father was an utterly awful person - in which case how dare he try to punish her on top of whatever he did - or because of the influence of her mother - in which case why punish the child? In any case children and teenagers may make poor choices sometimes but it is the job of parents to support and love them despite this. If the estrangement was by choice of the father, that is a horrible thing to do to a child and trying to take the gift from the grandparents away too makes it worse.

AnotherJoe

Sunflowerpower wrote: »

My husband is estranged from his daughter and has been for a number of years. My husbands parents set up a children's ISA for when their granddaughter reaches 18. However my husband does not want his parents to pass on the money to her due to the estranged circumstances. The daughter has no contact with the grandparents either. The building society are adamant that legally the money has to go to the child on 18. And the only way you can cancel is upon a death of the child. This seems ridiculous as people's circumstances change. It is against my husband's wishes that the grandparents want to pass on the money. Is there anything that can be done?

Does your husband own one of these?




If not, he's too late, they already gave the money and it became hers at that point.

Its just that she cannot access it for a while. But its hers already.

Malthusian

If someone gave their 30 year old granddaughter money for Christmas, and later her parents (their child and their spouse) divorced, would you think it reasonable for them to demand their Christmas presents back from their granddaughter?

Absolutely nothing is different in this situation. It is the granddaughter's money. Her age changes nothing.

If someone gives you a gift and then their "circumstances change" it doesn't mean you have to hand it back.

Sea_Shell

One other thing OP... Do you agree with your husband's stance on this issue??

Because otherwise you might need to tread very carefully when being the bearer of the news he probably doesn't want to hear.

Yellow_mango

How very sad that your husband would want to take money from his minor child. No matter what may have happened between them.

Regardless. This has literally zero to do with your husband, or you, or either or your relationships with this child. It was a gift from grandparents to their granddaughter. A gift which once made cannot legally be retracted.

If the grandparents wish for this gift to be returned due to “change in circumstances” they will need to wait until she is 18, and then ask her for it. How she responds to such a request is entirely her choice.