What do you think

Artdecogran

My husband has recently died and I am going to buy a new house to share with my son and his wife and two children. I am going to pay for the house outright with no financial contribution from my son. He will pay all bills, council tax etc and maintain the property, gardens and my car. He will also look after me when my health deteriorates. The trouble I have is that I have two other sons. My husband and I had made a will that split everything equally 3 ways but now circumstances have changed and I don’t know what the right thing to do is. The son I am going to live with does not earn as much as the other two sons and has a disabled daughter to care for as well. I do not want him to have to move out when I die. Am I wrong to want to safeguard his future over his more wealthy brothers?

borkid

Personally I wouldn't take the amount they earn into account. How old are you? Would it be possible to take the amount he pays ie bills etc into account by having a running tally which is then be taken off the estate when you die and he has the first option on buying the house for market value minus bills paid plus an amount for caring for you if necessary ( use the industry standard for this). Plus you could leave a fixed amount to your disabled grand daughter which could be used as the parents think best.


I would suggest your tell your other children of your reasoning or at least write it into your will.

Keep_pedalling

I don’t think you are wrong, especially as there is a disabled child to consider. You do have to be honest with your other children though.

Robisere

Speak to your other sons before you decide anything. They might agree with what you want to do: do they know first son's predicament, i.e. low earnings and disabled daughter? Are all your sons comfortable with each other? I come from a family of 3 sons, am the youngest and I know that it is not always the case that all siblings are happy with each other. I got on very well with senior brother, but neither of us could get on with middle brother.

In your case I would stress that you will be well looked after in a family environment, you are looking to the future and how your health may be as you get older. If their brother is happy to look after you in the way you describe, that should represent an ongoing commitment of care which will hopefully last well into the future.

sheramber

Where do you live- Scotland, England , Wales, Ireland ? Inheritance laws differ.

Will the house be in your name only?

What happens if your son and his wife are no longer to care for you. If you develop something like dementia where you need 24 care will they be able to provide that while caring for two children? The value of your house/share of house may be included in assessing your capital for any state funding.

Marvel1

You need to discuss with it them now.

theoretica

Have you considered the possibility of setting up a family trust? So the son and granddaughter in question benefit during their lives, but afterwards it is split between all your descendants? Perhaps something to consider in your discussions.

TBagpuss

I think that if you plan to leave things unequally, it would be a kindness to everyone to discuss it with your family ahead of time, so that they know what your reasons were.

Other than that
Have you considered options between leaving the house outright to your younger son and splitting everything 3 ways?

For instance, you say that your son earns less than his brothers, but he is working, so presumably he and his wife have some mortgage capacity?

You could consider an arrangement whereby they had a set period of time to allow them to buy out your other sons, for instance, and or an arrangement which left your estate in unequal shares to your sons.

You also have to consider the possibility that if you were to become too unwell to be cared for at home, it might becomes necessary to sell the house in any event.

DO you have any assets other than the house?

trailingspouse

What if you need to go into care - how will that be paid for?
What if your son and his wife split up - and he's the one that wants to move out?
What if your son pre-deceases you - would his wife still want to continue in this situation, with the possibility of ending up looking after an old lady and a disabled child?
Do they own their own home currently? If so, and they move into a house that you've paid for, what will happen to their existing home, or the capital if they sell it?


This needs a LOT of thinking about - and your son and his wife need to get independent advice so they can decide what's best for them.

Mojisola

Artdecogran wrote: »

My husband has recently died and I am going to buy a new house to share with my son and his wife and two children.

I wouldn't make a massive change to life for some time after a spouse's death - let life settle and see how things are going in six months or a year's time.

gettingtheresometime

Please don't take this the wrong way but what has changed for you to reconsider what your husband & you decided upon when you wrote your wills - presumably you discussed the contents before they were actually written?

If nothing has changed then why your change of heart? I appreciate your husband has recently died so this may just you 'panicking' about the future.

Personally I wouldn't rush into anything just yet & you give it at least a year before thinking about this.