Parents unwilling to help out at school

Savvy_Sue

scrimpingbadger wrote: »

Problem is: people do think the PTA peeps are supermums and are mostly terrified of being roped into a situation that a) make them feel inadequate b) have no time for.

Well, the PTA peeps ARE mostly supermums ... just not always in the sense people think. I was busy as a bee, but my house was (and still is!) a tip as a result. I found the way round a) was to pair people up: if Jenny offered to help on a stall, I'd ask her to see if her friend Jackie would help her out. And I made sure that I ran round with cups of tea all afternoon, and offered to give people a break on their stall so they could go and see what was what elsewhere.

The time thing has no easy answer ...

scrimpingbadger wrote: »

The school playground can be a terrifying place with cliques of women gossiping about other mums and their clear lack of mothering skills (well maybe it's just around here...)

Maybe it's the schools my boys were at, I've either never been aware of the cliques or was in one and didn't see it ... but I don't know how I got into it!

I did worry when I moved here, because I thought people would think I was very posh because I didn't have the local accent, but they couldn't have been nicer.

scrimpingbadger wrote: »

I'm a teacher and in teacher mode I can take on any parent in the world. In mummy mode I sidle to the edges and pray no one speaks to me!!

And they're maybe all thinking "Oh heck, she's that teacher from X school, I'd better not get on the wrong side of HER!" :rotfl:

scrimpingbadger wrote: »

I hope I'm not representative though. I just stand in the playground alot and observe the !!!!!ing.... The day some lady pulled something out of her buggy's basket and a large bottle of vodka clanked to the playground floor and rolled off. Well..... you can imagine what they made of that.

Not me, honest!

Amandaj32

When my son was first at primary school I went along to the PTFA meeting - hoping to join in and help. I was there with another 'newbie' and was really disappointed to find that the meeting centred around the lack of interest from parents and how previous events were not successful. I tried to add my views - at the time I lived alone with my son and did not drive, finances etc. I was 'told' that primary children are expensive and I just had to be prepared to 'pay' what I needed to in order to help the school. I have helped out at a few things but never joined the PTFA.

Now, there is a new group of people. Friendly, informative letters go out to the parents and it seems like a whole different ballgame. On Tuesday my son came home with a letter addressed to me personally - reminding me that I had agreed to help out. The letter was very friendly - and I phoned the school to say I would help at the Christmas Fair.

I think what I am trying to say is that things can change. The new 'company' are obviously focussing on the 'future' and not just moaning about the past and that's making all the difference!

Nenen

grannybroon wrote: »

I have been on these since kids born. ....................Thankfully turned out to be two very switched on adults.

GB

I'm sure all your efforts paid off granny! I remember reading research years ago (while studying to be a teacher) that showed that children whose parents were involved in their education (helped out either in the classroom, on trips, PTA and/or governing body etc) statistically do better in exams and have less behaviour problems etc. 26 years of teaching later, I am convinced that is true. Maybe you could use this to persuade people to help! Not exactly altruistic but useful nonetheless!

oldMcDonald

Another one here who would dearly love to be able to help out with the PTA at my sons school, but due to the time the meetings are held, is unable to attend. I find it so frustrating as they are desperate for parents, they only have the same 4 or 5 people doing everything. There is talk now of the PTA stopping as these parents either have children who are leaving or, as is the case with two of them, have already left.

I've bought up the issue of the timing of the meetings with them, but they said there wasn't much point in changing the time as this is the one that always worked best!

Strapped

I think that we must be very lucky at our school, as we have a thriving PTA that most parents are either involved in, or come to events put on by. But then, it's a tiny village with not a lot else going on I've found it hard to make some of the meetings, as I have a younger child as well as the one at school and I am away from my other half during the week, but I send my apologies if I can't make it, and get a copy of the minutes from the meeting. This does mean that I get volunteered for things though lol. I think that if people know you are interested, and what you're willing to do, then you can still be involved even if you can't make the meetings.

Nenen

oldMcDonald wrote: »

Another one here who would dearly love to be able to help out with the PTA at my sons school, but due to the time the meetings are held, is unable to attend. I find it so frustrating as they are desperate for parents, they only have the same 4 or 5 people doing everything. There is talk now of the PTA stopping as these parents either have children who are leaving or, as is the case with two of them, have already left.

I've bought up the issue of the timing of the meetings with them, but they said there wasn't much point in changing the time as this is the one that always worked best!

Sounds like you should wait until the current mob have all resigned and then offer to start a new 'Friends of the School' group... you can then arrange meetings to suit you and anyone else you can [strike]drag[/strike] co-opt into it!;)

Sazere

I havent had time to read all this thread but can I just say as a mom of 4 (eldest 6, youngest 13months). I want to help the school PTA but they won't allow younger children to attend meetings. The meetings are usually held around 6pm which is a great time but no children are allowed to attend!!! Lots of mums at the school from reception through to Y2 have expressed interest in attending meetings and helping out at Christmas Fayres, etc but most have other children. Same with literacy/numeracy sessions where they show you things to do at home to help your child learn you are not allowed to take other children.

Sorry just wanted to add I wasn't intending on taking all 4 kids along but certainly my 2 eldest who attend the school.

christineperseus

Why not offer to have a 'coffee morning' straight from school drop off for other parents who can't make the other meetings?
It is tough.........I have had many years of it, this will be my last Christmas Fayre - only 3 more school discos and one last Easter Fayre..............I'm looking forward to 'retirement'.