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Should i accept gift?

2

Comments

  • katie4
    katie4 Posts: 459 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 100 Posts Name Dropper I've been Money Tipped!
    wow ok was not expecting that response! And as far as discussing with the office, her comment was made with the audience of everybody in the office and they are all well aware of how nasty she is and every person here has had some issue with her at some point we are all vey close in our office as it is small we are friends so we talk about it
  • katie4
    katie4 Posts: 459 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 100 Posts Name Dropper I've been Money Tipped!
    and the person in question made a whole scene to the office about whether she should leave the gift or not as I was on leave she asked for their opinion which was obviously mixed maybe I should have explained the dynamics of our office, but I find your rude comments very unfair
  • sangie595
    sangie595 Posts: 6,092 Forumite
    katie4 wrote: »
    wow ok was not expecting that response! And as far as discussing with the office, her comment was made with the audience of everybody in the office and they are all well aware of how nasty she is and every person here has had some issue with her at some point we are all vey close in our office as it is small we are friends so we talk about it
    katie4 wrote: »
    and the person in question made a whole scene to the office about whether she should leave the gift or not as I was on leave she asked for their opinion which was obviously mixed maybe I should have explained the dynamics of our office, but I find your rude comments very unfair

    So basically, your argument is that the entire lot of you are unprofessional gossips and drama queens, so why shouldn't you be? Excellent!

    This is work. They are not friends, they are colleagues. And all of you, you included, should bee acting like grown ups.

    Good grief, this is the definition of "first world problems"... I feel for your poor managers.
  • katie4
    katie4 Posts: 459 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 100 Posts Name Dropper I've been Money Tipped!
    sangie595 wrote: »
    So basically, your argument is that the entire lot of you are unprofessional gossips and drama queens, so why shouldn't you be? Excellent!

    This is work. They are not friends, they are colleagues. And all of you, you included, should bee acting like grown ups.

    Good grief, this is the definition of "first world problems"... I feel for your poor managers.



    not at all, and yes it is a small business we are all friends in and out of work and our manager is in the office with us
    basically all I wanted help with was whether I should accept the gift or would it not be appropriate given the circumstances
  • culpepper
    culpepper Posts: 4,076 Forumite
    I think you should accept the gift and say thank you for remembering xyz's birthday. Then not mention it anymore and just get on with life as normal. No more references to the altercation. Life is too short to make your workplace a war zone and your work life a mental struggle every day.
  • spadoosh
    spadoosh Posts: 8,732 Forumite
    Ninth Anniversary 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    katie4 wrote: »
    not at all, and yes it is a small business we are all friends in and out of work and our manager is in the office with us
    basically all I wanted help with was whether I should accept the gift or would it not be appropriate given the circumstances

    What do you mean youre friends, sangie has said youre not friends youre work colleagues so you cant be!

    Your manager is in the office with you? What kind of work establishment is this? Your manager shouldve sacked everyone because sangie said theyre unprofessional. Clearly your manager isnt capable of managing.

    Youre wondering if you should accept a gift from a colleague you where friends with who youve had a falling out with? No you should be sacked because you spoke about it with a colleague.

    Im amazed at the contempt you are receiving. Its pretty appalling.
  • AstroTurtle
    AstroTurtle Posts: 290 Forumite
    edited 13 September 2018 at 11:09AM
    spadoosh wrote: »
    What do you mean youre friends, sangie has said youre not friends youre work colleagues so you cant be!

    Your manager is in the office with you? What kind of work establishment is this? Your manager shouldve sacked everyone because sangie said theyre unprofessional. Clearly your manager isnt capable of managing.

    Youre wondering if you should accept a gift from a colleague you where friends with who youve had a falling out with? No you should be sacked because you spoke about it with a colleague.

    Im amazed at the contempt you are receiving. Its pretty appalling.

    Probably because this is more of a childish problem and not one of employment law or actually employment issue.

    It's more of a "Dear diary, xyz gave me a present today but she is mean wahhh what should I do?"

    Sangie is right that should XYZ go to a tribunal and say that katie4 is a gossip and a bully and comments like " they are all well aware of how nasty she is and every person here has had some issue with her at some point we are all vey close in our office as it is small we are friends so we talk about it "

    Does sound like a case for it. Don't forget at tribunals they don't care if your "friends" they will look at it black and white. Victims can soon become the opposite if the bully wants to spin another tale. Don't leave yourself open to it by not being a gossip and playing schoolkids.

    Also OP you can't make a "formal complaint" against someone because you took something offensive and expect to be protected as such and then in the same breath say your gossiping and potentially bullying (Remember XYZ only has to interpret you all discussing her in her absence as bullying for it to become a allegation) behaviour is different cause you're all friends in a small office.

    One rule for one.....
    Save £12k in 2019 -
  • sangie595
    sangie595 Posts: 6,092 Forumite
    IT_manager wrote: »
    Katie, just press the report button on all the insulting posts. It's astounding how they are telling you to grow up whilst acting like playground bullies.

    In regard to your question, I would just take the gift and send a thank you text. You don't have to like everybody you work with, but you do need to work with them all the same. You need to make your point that her actions were unacceptable and move on.
    You joined to complain about about posts that weren't insulting? Seems the OP isn't the only one who needs to grow up. Or are you the OP? I repeat, first world problems. Not being told what you want to hear is not bullying or insulting, and a workplace is not the place to act out high drama over next to nothing.
  • Comms69
    Comms69 Posts: 14,229 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Third Anniversary Name Dropper
    IT_manager wrote: »
    Katie, just press the report button on all the insulting posts. It's astounding how they are telling you to grow up whilst acting like playground bullies.

    In regard to your question, I would just take the gift and send a thank you text. You don't have to like everybody you work with, but you do need to work with them all the same. You need to make your point that her actions were unacceptable and move on.

    Yes absolutely; we’re the bullies. Strangers with no vested interest in the OP, her job or her life...

    You literally joined the forum to play white knight... and judged everyone else as bullies, don’t you know name calling isn’t nice?
  • Comms69
    Comms69 Posts: 14,229 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Third Anniversary Name Dropper
    IT_manager wrote: »
    Just giving you a taste of your own medicine. Oh bless aren't newbies allowed an opinion.

    Oh no my feelings..... how will I cope?

    Oh wait by being an emotionally mature adult.
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