Logistics of sister buying house with elderly mother

Beegarden

Wow, thank you to all of you for your so helpful advice. This is not going to be much fun, but my brother is travelling to my Mum's tonight and they, my sister and myself are going to video messenger tomorrow morning. I shall now have some very valid points to put to the table and hope that we can come to some consensus with as little bad feeling as possible. Thank you so much.


I have today been looking at the prices of detached bungalows in Brighton, and it seems, if she does move, she can well afford somewhere on her own, with money left over from her £600K, the value of her current house. Mum is currently able to do everything for herself, apart from walk long distances, so this would simplify everything and leave her some disposable for future needs. In response to one of the questions, I have no idea of my sister's wealth, but she and her husband do rent out at least one house and this will have to be a question tomorrow. The house being looked at currently has a swimming pool, so I reckon the £600 would be about a third. It's all very sordid. Thank you all..

teddysmum

This does sound like the situations which cropped up when care home costs first became popular news.


People , even with flawed (?) legal advice, decided to share a property with a parent, sure that 'The Council' would find it too much trouble to recover part of a house, to cover care fees, meaning they wouldn't have to pay up and the rest of the property (possibly an upgrade on what they could personally afford) would become all theirs.


Unfortunately for them (but not other tax payers, who'd have to pay the bill), as councils became more in need of income, they become more willing to pursue matters.

Sea_Shell

I hope the meeting (call) all goes well BeeGarden, but be prepared, sometimes being the "voice of reason", doesn't go down well with those who think they have a brilliant plan.

I hope they don't make you feel like the bad guy, with all your "negitivity", and then ignore everything you have to bring to the meeting i.e. sensible advise/questions/things to think seriously about.

Trying to get families to see the bigger, Long-term, picture, where things like this is concerned is hard, without it coming across as just you being difficult or doing it out of any perceived "loss" on your part.

Good Luck!!!

baldelectrician

Why doesnt your mum move in to a rental property owned by her family.

Then there is no probelm with the house if something happens

She could add her children to a joint bank account where the money for the house sale went, then it is not depravation of an asset (the money is still in her name- albeit joint names).
The family could then gain access to the money legally should she wish that

gettingtheresometime

baldelectrician wrote: »

She could add her children to a joint bank account where the money for the house sale went, then it is not depravation of an asset (the money is still in her name- albeit joint names).
The family could then gain access to the money legally should she wish that

Oh good God no.


Gives an entirely new meaning to the Bank of Mum.

AnotherJoe

Beegarden wrote: »

I have today been looking at the prices of detached bungalows in Brighton, and it seems, if she does move, she can well afford somewhere on her own, with money left over from her £600K, the value of her current house. Mum is currently able to do everything for herself, apart from walk long distances, so this would simplify everything and leave her some disposable for future needs. In response to one of the questions, I have no idea of my sister's wealth, but she and her husband do rent out at least one house and this will have to be a question tomorrow. The house being looked at currently has a swimming pool, so I reckon the £600 would be about a third. It's all very sordid. Thank you all..

I would start with "so mum if you dont like Brighton* miss Maidenhead or your friends, or the house is or becomes unsuitable, will you force sister to sell the house? If not then this is a one way trip"

"Mum are you happy to leave all your friends behind"? (This one may be less of an issue, as my mum aged her friends died well before her so actually moving to a new area was no longer an issue)

I dont know an easy way of broaching the issue that when mum dies, you might have to claim against sister for the share and that might force them to sell their house.

* I had friends who lived there and I used to visit for work later on (after they had moved on).
Its about the windiest place I've been. In summer its nice what with the sea and all (though rammed with visitors June - Sep and the roads jammed and parking an issue though as i said on your other thread time will likely take care of that), in winter its deserted, cold, wet and windy and frankly 'orrible.

xylophone

then it is not depravation of an asset (the money is still in her name- albeit joint names).

The LA could well regard such an arrangement as a gift ( so possibly deprivation of capital) since it would give a person other than the provider of the funds unlimited access to the whole of the account.

Sea_Shell

Any further developments. How'd the meeting/call go?