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I have a problem, and my apologies if I've posted in the wrong place. I ordered a Sainsbury's 0% credit card a couple of weeks ago and had wondered why it hadn't turned up. It had. My sister had intercepted both of the letters (one with the card and one with the pin) and by the time I'd got it she'd maxed the entire £1,200 balance in less than a week - including over £1,000 in withdrawals. There are various reasons why there is no point me having her prosecuted - amongst which she has BPD and won't learn anything and that I am a student and get paid the week beginning the 24th September - but what can I do to reduce how much this is going to cost me in the meantime?
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  • If you can, speak to your parents.

    Irrespective of your sisters BPD ect, she has broken the law. If she is in your parents care, they may be willing to help you.

    Having her prosecuted is tough, but would reporting her to the police and having her spoken to teach her a lesson to stop this behaviour in the future?

    Is your sister claiming any benefits? Can she contribute to the monthly payments? Can anything she purchased be returned for a refund?

    Whilst I'd normally suggest swapping to a 0% balance transfer card to give you breathing room, you run the risk of this happening again.

    Of course, do make sure you don't let her know when cards are coming. With the exception of other branded credit cards, can you your bank cards delivered to the bank? I once had this done because my housemates frequently (was a student at the time) lost my post.
  • macman
    macman Posts: 53,129 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    edited 31 August 2018 at 9:14AM
    It's presumed that you now have possession of the card and the PIN. If not, cancel it to avoid further fraud. Unless you report the fraud, then you remain 100% liable for any debt on it: there is no way around that. That can only be your decision.
    The card may well be 0% interest, but that won't apply to the £1K of cash withdrawn on it: these normally attract interest immediately at the quoted rate, which could be as much as 30%. You don't get the normal 30 days interest free period on these, so by 24/9 you will have already incurred interest charges of around £25 on top of the minimum payment.
    The only way to reduce the total cost is to pay it off as soon as you can, if necessary by borrowing at a cheaper rate than you are paying for the cash advances.
    No free lunch, and no free laptop ;)
  • foxy-stoat
    foxy-stoat Posts: 6,879 Forumite
    Eighth Anniversary 1,000 Posts Name Dropper
    Get another 0% balance transfer card and get it all on 0%, then cancel the sainsbury card.

    I would also take £1200 worth of goods from your sister so you can sell them and maybe get back some of the money that she stole from you.
  • dealer_wins
    dealer_wins Posts: 7,334 Forumite
    foxy-stoat wrote: »
    Get another 0% balance transfer card and get it all on 0%, then cancel the sainsbury card.

    I would also take £1200 worth of goods from your sister so you can sell them and maybe get back some of the money that she stole from you.

    Your sister will love it lol

    Seriously though, and stating the bleeding obvious make sure its delivered to your place of work address!!!
  • PRAISETHESUN
    PRAISETHESUN Posts: 4,824 Forumite
    Sixth Anniversary 1,000 Posts Photogenic Name Dropper
    Unless you report this then as has been mentioned, you remain 100% liable for the debt. It is always difficult when a family member is involved like this, but remember - you have been stolen from, and your first priority should always be yourself, particularly if this has now put you in a difficult situation financially. How would your sister react if you did this to her? The £1000 of cash advances is particularly worrying, as they attract hefty immediate interest rates (which won't be covered by the 0% deal) which you need to pay off NOW to avoid it getting very expensive, and they will also seriously damage your credit history for the foreseeable future, unless you report it as fraud.

    Personally I feel like they wouldn't have learnt their lesson if you don't report it. What happens next time when it is a much larger sum that you cannot afford to deal with?
  • dealer_wins
    dealer_wins Posts: 7,334 Forumite
    My brother or sister pulled that on me not only would I happily report them to whoever, I would also one way or another get my money back. I would be beyond livid!!!
  • Don't know much about Borderline Personality Disorder but it doesn't look like a barrel of laughs, so I imagine life must be quite challenging for you all.

    The thing that puzzles me is that your sister seems to have specifically targeted your card and PIN and so knew what she was doing and presumably knew she was doing wrong - but I'm only guessing.

    If your sister didn't have this condition, would you report the crime then? If not, then I understand. I see others are quite certain what they'd do; it is easy to have those attitudes when you aren't involved or affected but it is always more difficult when you are involved and it is no longer a hypothetical situation.

    Practically, try to get a 0% card to transfer the balance and pay it off within the promotional period. You also need to try and ensure that your sister does understand what she did was wrong and that you are now suffering, and that she should help you pay it off. You might also (as suggested by other posts) try to sell off (or return for a refund) some of the things she has purchased (if at all possible).

    Best of luck
  • gionnetto
    gionnetto Posts: 234 Forumite
    Sixth Anniversary 100 Posts I've been Money Tipped!
    My sister had intercepted both of the letters (one with the card and one with the pin) and by the time I'd got it she'd maxed the entire £1,200 balance in less than a week - including over £1,000 in withdrawals.

    Speak to your parents. Either they foot the bill or you report the fraud.

    Next, move out.

    Whatever your sister's ailment is, it doesn't have to mean impunity. Unless she gets her cage rattled, she won't learn from her mistakes.

    I'm sorry you have to go through this. My mother is like that, that's how I know that the sooner you nip it in the bud the better it is to keep her under control.

    Hugs.
    Your cholesterol levels are not seen, or used, by your heart and arteries, so ignore it.
    :eek:.
  • Willing2Learn
    Willing2Learn Posts: 6,294 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    I just wanted to say to anyone passing judgement on the sister. Impulsive and uninhibited spending is a common symptom of BPD.


    @OP - When you are due to receive a card, advise the bank that you want to pick up the card from a branch as your mailbox isn't secure (make them precisely aware of the problem). That will cover you against this type of situation. :)
    I work within the voluntary sector, supporting vulnerable people to rebuild their lives.

    I love my job

    :smiley:
  • macman
    macman Posts: 53,129 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    I just wanted to say to anyone passing judgement on the sister. Impulsive and uninhibited spending is a common symptom of BPD.


    @OP - When you are due to receive a card, advise the bank that you want to pick up the card from a branch as your mailbox isn't secure (make them precisely aware of the problem). That will cover you against this type of situation. :)

    I think most of us understand that. But in this case, sis didn't just impulsively spend her own money., or buy on her own credit. She stole the card and then used it fraudulently, knowing that her sister would have to pay it back if it was not reported.
    No free lunch, and no free laptop ;)
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