This seems the best place for Advance Decision/Living Will

Alloneword

I hope this is the best place for this one, if not can a mod move it for me please, thanks.

So 52 and just had a stroke :AI am doing so so but i did see some sights that made me think i need to make sure I am not left in a situation where the doctors do all they can to keep me alive at ALL costs, that is the last thing I want is to be locked in, in some way or as many people say become a "vegetable" I'm sorry if that word offends people but I think people know what I’m trying to say.

In a nutshell I’m terrified of not being able to have a normal life be that unable to speak or or can't do things for myself like eating for myself etc, so i have been looking at these living wills/advance decisions etc and i have one or 2 chats with the doctors and it would seem they are not as rock solid as people are being lead to believe.

So does anyone have any experience of them,, either making their or had having to ask the doctors to carry out the persons request be that stopping food or water or medication, knowing full well it would lead to the patient dying, also any experience of using online forms or templates or even going to a solicitors to get them to draw one up.

I'm sorry if this thread upsets anyone it's not my motive, i just need to make sure i have this set in stone before anything else goes wrong for me, and hopefully this thread may help others as well.

All1

Alloneword

Sorry i forgot to ad if anyone wants to PM me to give some info i'm more than happy to get them

All1

Gers

It's about making your choices clear beforehand.

I believe that the regulations differ between the UK home countries.

My mother recently had the DNR conversation with her GP and with medical staff in hospital. Now it's noted for the future.

Have web search for more information. Well done on your future planning.

Keep_pedalling

You should also consider a health and welfare LPA. If you have people you can trust to make sure your wishes are met, then an LPA should cover everything, but if you think an attorney would be reluctant to let you go, then you will need an advanced decision in place.

A LPA is still advisable as it covers areas that an AD does not, like temporary mental incapacity. Have a good look through the following link to Compassion in Dying, which provides lots of info on LPAs and ADs.

https://compassionindying.org.uk/making-decisions-and-planning-your-care/planning-ahead/

You should also seriously consider making a financial LPA as well.

lollipopsarah

My FIL had a major stroke recently and when in the resucitation room he made it clear that he wanted DNR
Sadly after 2 horrid months he passed away, but bless him he was 93, please raise a glass tomorrrow for his funeral.
Sincerely hope you gain a full recovery.
xx

Alloneword

This is the whole problem, the above statements all seem to contradict one another, if my living will says DNR/stop feeding and watering me if i have a stroke that's fine if i have a stroke but what if i have something on top of this then the docs can say we don't have to pay attention to the living will, your second statement says it all to be honest, there seems to be no hard and fast rule on it, trust me i have tried searching and nobody can point to legal cases or case law, the last thing i need is people fighting over this or that when i'm in the bed beside them.

Keep pedalling I'm on state handouts so cash is tight but i can pay about £200-£300 on all this topic so not much to go round, I did have the link for Compassion in Dying as that is where i got my Advance Decision from, but again they have no cases on file that show the service they offer has worked or been challenged and they won, reason i'm so worried about this is one of the specialist gave me a very strong hint they docs tend to i wont say ignore them but i'm a doctor and i know best is the expression i will use, they may know what is best to keep the patient alive but not what is best for ME.

lollipopsarah I'm so sorry this post has come at this time for you and i'm sorry for your loss, and this is the thing i'm trying to avoid not just for me but also for my wife, i don't drink but i wish you all the best and i hope it goes as well as these things can


All1

Yorkshireman99

Before a recent emergency heart bypass operation I had occasion to discuss this with the medical team. I found them incredibly helpful and glad to discuss it. It seems many do not and it makes if difficult for them. I also have both types of LPOA in place. One of the health attorneys is a retired soldier having seen active service in the Falklands and subsequently as a paramedic. He knows my wishes and clearly understands the issues. I feel very confident that he will make the right decision if need be. It relieves the family of any burden they may feel. I would urge everyone to discuss the issues with their families long before any need is likely. IMHO even young adults should consider the issue.

Keep_pedalling

Alloneword wrote: »

This is the whole problem, the above statements all seem to contradict one another, if my living will says DNR/stop feeding and watering me if i have a stroke that's fine if i have a stroke but what if i have something on top of this then the docs can say we don't have to pay attention to the living will, your second statement says it all to be honest, there seems to be no hard and fast rule on it, trust me i have tried searching and nobody can point to legal cases or case law, the last thing i need is people fighting over this or that when i'm in the bed beside them.

Keep pedalling I'm on state handouts so cash is tight but i can pay about £200-£300 on all this topic so not much to go round, I did have the link for Compassion in Dying as that is where i got my Advance Decision from, but again they have no cases on file that show the service they offer has worked or been challenged and they won, reason i'm so worried about this is one of the specialist gave me a very strong hint they docs tend to i wont say ignore them but i'm a doctor and i know best is the expression i will use, they may know what is best to keep the patient alive but not what is best for ME.

lollipopsarah I'm so sorry this post has come at this time for you and i'm sorry for your loss, and this is the thing i'm trying to avoid not just for me but also for my wife, i don't drink but i wish you all the best and i hope it goes as well as these things can


All1

You may well find that you qualify to have LPA fees waived.

sleepymans

A very pertinent issue for the "baby boomer" generation.Those of us who have taken "ownership" of our fertility, career and life limiting illnesses......set to become a hot topic methinks?

Flugelhorn

Fair bit of info here and some sample forms http://www.necn.nhs.uk/common-themes/deciding-right/

observations_from_a_hill

Your GP can write you DNACPR order if appropriate.