Nightmare neighbour - advice please

Debt_Free_Chick

wherediditallgo wrote: »

As for speaking to the carer, they're governed by the Data Protection Act, plus this man has a right to confidentiality

Thanks for that. I meant to suggest that the OP's relative enquires of the carer in a neighbourly, concerned way, without demanding information about the guy's situation - healthwise, or "anyother-wise".

Heaven knows, the poor carer might be grateful for a friendly neighbour, given the description of how the other neighbours seem to behave! :mad:

macaque_2

Obviously, she could move, as she is only renting (ironically, she very nearly bought a flat just a few doors down before renting this one - thank goodness she didn't). But that would seem like letting him win, as in all other respects the flat is perfect. Whilst other neighbours know the guy, they don't think he's been this bad previously.

Some people on this thread make bold judgements about this situation but the fact is that she is a 50 year old single lady. If nothing else, this chap has been intimidating her. This whole thing sounds deeply alarming and for my penny's worth, I would (strongly) recommends she moves. Even if this fellow is innocent, there is someone out there slashing her tyres. This is not about winning or losing, its about being able to live in your own home without fear.

carolt

Having just updated with my relative last night, apparently the 'carer' if that's what she is also appears to have some learning disabilities of some sort and may be a partner rather than a carer.

No, it is definitely NOT Tourette's - he doesn't randomly swear at other people and before this started she had plenty of normal conversations with him in which he never swore. He now shouts 'Sl@g' at her every time she goes out of doors - that's deliberate intimidation. Whilst I appreciate that neighbours MAY object to having someone with learning disabilities in their midst, it seems as unfair to typecast the whole street as intolerant - apparently, according to the police - not just the neighbours - there have been a string of minor disturbances involving this couple/man.

Of course, it could be utter coincidence that 6 tyres were slashed and he started shouting abuse at her on a daily basis all within the same week, but it seems highly unlikely to me. That said, my relative has left it up to the police to deal with - suspicions are not evidence.

That said, for a 57 year old woman living on her own, this kind of thing is quite frightening. I'm inclined to think they have picked on her for no other reason than that she is on her own and vulnerable - apparently the previous tenant, a young lady, had a towering German boyfriend who would fill the doorframe - they weren't going to try messing with him.

I find it hard to have any sympathy with this couple possibly being deprived of a home - if they haven't being paying their rent, then that is what they have to expect, and my relative and the rest of the street have as much right to live undisturbed in peace as they do.

Noone's asking them to move - just to stop intimidating their neighbours and possibly causing criminal damage. In fact, to behave as they had been doing until a few weeks ago.

Thanks, Tamsalina, I didn't realise the council could house people in the middle of a private street and your experience is useful - I will pass it on. She is keeping a full diary of all events, and the police have told her to call them in the event of future problems - they have been excellent.

WTF?_2

Debt_Free_Chick wrote: »

Errmmmmm..... hold on a minute. All we have is the gossip offered by other neighbours and a young man who is thought to have some kind of learning/mental disability.

And we're being asked how to have him thrown out of his home .... .for shouting abuse ....?

I'm sorry, but this seems far too excessive to me. There is absolutely no evidence that he is any way responsible for the (criminal) damage to the tyres.

I take your point on the tyre slashing - these days it could have been anyone - but no way should anyone have to put up with abuse and intimidation from a neighbour.

If this guy really is verbally abusing and intimidating neighbours because of his mental condition it sounds like he'd be better off in care where they'd have suitable facilities to give him the care he needs rather than being dropped into the community, where he clearly isn't capable of functioning properly.

If that isn't going to happen, I would think that the person on the receiving end should seriously thinking about moving out to somewhere where she will face less aggro and potential danger.

Jonbvn

Hi,

I found this website called Rotten Neighbour. Although it is not going to solve the OP's problems, it could be a good thing if people started listing problem neighbours on this site (assuming you don't want to sell!)

At present, it is mostly USA based, but there there are some people listed in the UK (<20).

The main site: http://www.rottenneighbor.com/

The map of the UK shwing the rotten ones:
http://www.rottenneighbor.com/vimsearch.php?address=England&submit.x=14&submit.y=13

fistfullofdollars

Why dont you confront him and ask him what have you done to upset him !?!? You might just have to think outside the box on this one as he has issues.

Also, I hope you are not jumping to conclusions about him. Do you definatley know he did the car in? Could quite easily have been one of the local chav population that grace our shores.