Advice needed on separation/divorce!!

TBagpuss

Yes, your partner can divorce his wife even if she does not consent. She will need to be served with the paperwork and could delay matters if she does not cooperate.

He will need to sort out financial issues which will take into account the financial positions that he and his wife are in now, not what the position was when they stopped living together.

Until such time as he is able to finalise the divorce, you and he should make sure that you both have up to date wills, and that if you have a house together, that you are both on the deeds.

Does his wife and children live in the UK? If so, then he will be able to apply to the courts for contact if she or her family try to prevent this. If she lives overseas then it would normally be the law of the country where the children live which would apply.

However, if he is living in the Uk he would normally be able to start divorce proceedings here even if she does not live in this country.

As others have said, in English law there is no such thing as a Common Law wife or husband, no matter how long you and he live together.

45012168

His wife and kids live in the U.K. His wife is only not accepting a divorce because the person who does not want this to happen is his mother. It!!!8217;s her son and her niece who are married and because of cultural implications and other such crap she does not want that. His kids are all grown up, between 10-20. He just does not want to be the reason his mum cuts him out of her life. She is also ill and he doesn!!!8217;t want to make her more unwell. He just wants to keep the peace. We don!!!8217;t own a house or anything yet and neither does his wife.

Any money we make is in my name, he doesn!!!8217;t keep any. His wife wouldn!!!8217;t be interested in taking any and he by choice will give to his kids but we have decided that of something happens to him, then I will be the one to split the money with his other kids. Would this all have to be written in a will or not? I speak to everyone in his family and we all get along but the !!!8216;divorce!!!8217; thing is something we all just accept and have left it, obviously with me being the main one who loses out.

Can someone please explain what would happen in the event something happened to him? Can I still step forward to sign papers etc or would his wife have to, even though she wouldn!!!8217;t want to. She!!!8217;s not out to get revenge or anything o that sort.

silvercar

He needs to write a will, in order to protect your interests. Also an LPA (health and financial).

TBagpuss

He needs to write a will. If the assets are in your name then it is his wife and children who would be at risk of losing out, not you, if anything happened to him.

If he doesn't make a will then it is his wife who would have the right to do things such as organise his funeral, and if her were incapacitated it would be hr, and then his parents, who would have the highest eligibility to apply to act as his deputy.

Like any other unmarried couple, you should both make wills, and ensure that you are each shown as the other's emergency contact etc. If either is admitted to hospital then you can name the other as the person you would want to be told about / informed in decisions about you.

rach_k

Just a thought - why is his mother okay with you being married to him in a religious ceremony but not legally? Does she see it as polygamy? If not, he should try talking to her, or can somebody else within the religious community mediate? People can be illogical idiots - if she has religious issues with divorce but is only 'making' them stay legally married, she's being stupid but might not realise. Sometimes, people confuse culture with religion but once it's pointed out to them what their religion actually says, they will put aside the cultural aspects in favour of the religion. Perhaps if you had a nice respectable old guy from your place of worship onside, she may listen to sense.

I'm not saying that your husband should be doing what she wants - I personally think he should grow a pair and get the divorce - but I know that won't always happen!