Martial home with kids involved

badmemory

I would suspect that the reason he is not paying the mortgage is solely because of the effect it would have on you & your career.

This would suggest that your best option is to sell up asap. After all better to have a job & a possibility of a new home for your children than no home, no job & still needing to live with your parents.

Fireflyaway

I don't know the details of your situation but if this were me I'd be wanting a fresh start. Can you afford to rent somewhere and then sell the house or could your ex buy you out?
Even if it takes a while to sort the house issue, at least renting somewhere you are getting out of your parents and making a new life for you and the kids. Then when the house is sold you can use funds for a deposit to buy somewhere. You might have to wait to buy anyway if not paying the mortgage has dented your credit.

TBagpuss

OP, the key question is whether you can afford to pay the mortgage and other outgoings yourself.
If you can, then as part of a divorce setlement you can ask the court to make an order which either transfers the house into your sole name (if you can get a mortgage to get him off the existing one) or which allows you to remain living in the property on the basis that you will use your best endeavours to remortgage and release him from liability as soon as you can (at which point the house can be transferred to you)

In both cases, this would most likely be coupled with an order giving him a charge over the property entitling him to a lump sum representing his current interest in the equity, and payable at a set point in the future (possibly when the children leave school, possibly earlier)

If you are not in a position to afford the mortgage and other outgoings then selling the property is likely to be the best bet (unless at that point he offers to buy you out, and is able to show he can afford it)

The start point would be an equal split of the equity but it may be fair for it to be unequal depending on your respective needs and resources, so it s important for you to loo at what your mortgage capacity would be in your own right, whether there might be an option for you to buy another property, or perhaps a shared ownership home, rather than renting.

You also need to take into account any assets either of you have other than the house.

mattpaint

How much is the house worth, how much equity is in it, what's your income, what's his income, do you have any debts, is he willing to sell the house and when will you be working again?