Taken on a nervous rescue cat

Shoxt3r

Hi all,

We recently took on a new, neutered 8 year old female cat from Cat's Protection and she has been with us for just over a month now. She seems to be settling in ok but is still very nervous around us, particularly if we're just wandering around the house at which point she will hide underneath a table or shoot up to our bedroom and hide underneath the bed. Almost every morning she meows for her food but also hisses if we're not quick enough to give it to her. We have finally got to the stage where she is sniffing our hands but anymore than once doing this or any attempt to get closer to her or stroke her results in her backing away completely - this evening she even hissed at my wife but did seem to act a bit sheepish afterwards.

Her routine is to sleep under our bed or sometimes play with her toys in the dining room by herself. In the mornings we are usually up to get her fed early in the morning before work - this is kept to the same time whenever possible at the weekend as well. After eating she will then go back upstairs to sleep under our bed. She sometimes wanders around the house but this is mainly kept to the evenings when we both get back from work.

She is a very loving cat at heart it seems, especially when we've tried to give her attention under the bed - it is only here that we can stroke her and give her chin scratches which she loves. She has also got really into being brushed, particularly as she is a long-hair. However when she comes out from under the bed it's like she is a completely different cat and doesn't like to have any attention apart from the sniffing of a hand as I already mentioned.

We are unsure of her history other than she was part of a group of cats taken from a house with a fair few cats of different ages, but only 1 owner who sadly became too ill to look after them properly. We have tried a Feliway plugin since we got her but this doesn't seem to have relaxed her all that much.

There have been a few changes around the house as we are busy decorating one room at a time which is out of bounds at the moment but otherwise she has full run of the house - nothing has been changed in terms of where she eats, sleeps or goes to the toilet though.

Please could someone advise what we could try next to help her gain more confidence around us? We appreciate it's going to potentially take some time but there seems to be a lot of backwards-forwards with her generally. About 2 weeks ago we have been trying to ignore giving her attentiom under the bed in the hope it will encourage her to come out and take attention in the rest of the house but this doesn't seem to be the case.

Thanks in advance!

[Deleted User]

My rescue girl cat took years to come around.

Had her nearly 10 years, total perseverance.

This week I found out she wasn't 10 or 11 (our years) like I always was lead to believe but probably much nearer 15 which explains some things - I feel bad I didn't know her real age sooner.

WibblyGirly

I was told my cat would be nervous and shy (as that's how he was in the shelter and hissed at people). Mine actually came out of his shell within a day.
They did tell me not to be nervous around him or with touching him. I basically had to pretend we were best mates and just go in confident with stroking him.
Maybe have a few treats to give her when your stroking her under the bed so she associates you with good stuff.

GwylimT

Decorating/changing room around can be very stressful for many cats, as not only does it produce smells they aren't familiar with, but sounds as well.

As under the bed is her safe space I would ignore her, otherwise it undermines her safe space. She won't mind being ignored, so don't feel guilty about it.

How many tall places do she have to sit on?

NeilCr

I have had four rescue cats. They've all been different. Current cat was fine - I had another cat at the time so kept them separate but all he wanted to do was come out and explore.

The last one took her time. There is a hole in my spare bed where a previous cat ripped it and she spent a lot of time going through there and sleeping in a drawer.

I do think you have to let them work it out themselves. I know how you feel. I always want them settled as quickly as possible and get a bit anxious if they don't. Trouble is, I find anyway, cats pick up on your feelings and that makes them anxious too.

And, as you say, you don't know the background. My cat was a stray all his life before being rescued as far as we know (he was 7-8). He's a lovely cat with me (although I could do without the attacks on my bare feet) and anyone who comes in the house. But he was in the vets for a dental a couple of weeks back and was an absolute monster. They have to learn to be around humans

Stick at it. It sounds like you have a good cat there and it will be worth the perseverance

Robin9

Perservere - my Tasha was 2 when we had her, lived wild and had a couple of litters. She would only do things on her terms, didn't like being handled.

Is your new rescue on her own ?

cottage_retreatist

When we got our new rescue (4 years ago) she was like this, we forgot we had her for 2 weeks cause she hid behind the sofa and only ate if we pushed a plate behind the sofa for her to eat from!

We just gave her time and didn't do things we knew made her distressed. So didnt try and pick her up, or make sudden movements if she came towards us. Took almost 2 years but she's super loving - not like if we'd had her as a kitten, so still runs at sudden movements, and won't be picked up, but she comes up to us for hugs and sits close to us at night. It was our other cat who brought her out of her shell. Do you have another one to support her?

Also feliway has always helped us. Hope that helps?

edited to say - you say you've tried feliway, try it just in the room where she hides and it takes a few weeks to kick into action so give it time!

Shoxt3r

GwylimT wrote: »

Decorating/changing room around can be very stressful for many cats, as not only does it produce smells they aren't familiar with, but sounds as well.

As under the bed is her safe space I would ignore her, otherwise it undermines her safe space. She won't mind being ignored, so don't feel guilty about it.

How many tall places do she have to sit on?

Hmm that was our thought about the decorating as well, though strangely she seems more keen to investigate around the house since we started decorating and is quite happy sitting on the furniture we've had to move into another room as a result. Unfortunately situations have changed since we got her so we have more time to decorate all of a sudden.

Good idea to ignore her under the bed, that was our thought as well since it's the one space we are unlikely to be around unless it's nighttime when she will usually explore downstairs anyway.

We have a few spaces around the house - her favourite spot is to climb on top of the kitchen worktops which we try to discourage. She will often climb up where a window is to see the birds outside. Other than that she has a scratching post/pedestal which we've seen her scratch but not sit on yet. She will also tend to sit on the dining table or chairs.

NeilCr wrote: »

I have had four rescue cats. They've all been different. Current cat was fine - I had another cat at the time so kept them separate but all he wanted to do was come out and explore.

The last one took her time. There is a hole in my spare bed where a previous cat ripped it and she spent a lot of time going through there and sleeping in a drawer.

I do think you have to let them work it out themselves. I know how you feel. I always want them settled as quickly as possible and get a bit anxious if they don't. Trouble is, I find anyway, cats pick up on your feelings and that makes them anxious too.

And, as you say, you don't know the background. My cat was a stray all his life before being rescued as far as we know (he was 7-8). He's a lovely cat with me (although I could do without the attacks on my bare feet) and anyone who comes in the house. But he was in the vets for a dental a couple of weeks back and was an absolute monster. They have to learn to be around humans

Stick at it. It sounds like you have a good cat there and it will be worth the perseverance

Haha yes, our first rescue cat was very different as he walked around like he'd been there all the time from day 1 of bringing him home and was very friendly. Unfortunately he was much older (16 when we got him) and sadly developed cancer after just under a year so we were forced to put him down. We are trying not to compare him and our new cat though since they are so different.

Like others have said it seems we just need to persevere. My wife has had a fair few cats at her parent's place and all were different. The last 2 (came as a pair, brothers) they had took around 1-2 years for them to really come out of their shell.

Robin9 wrote: »

Perservere - my Tasha was 2 when we had her, lived wild and had a couple of litters. She would only do things on her terms, didn't like being handled.

Is your new rescue on her own ?

Yes she is on her own - we asked Cat's Protection if that would be alright as it sounds like she was part of a few cats at her previous place and they said because she is quite timid naturally she would be happier on her own.

----
In general terms she seems quite defensive and shy - always looking out to see if there are threats around (presumably this comes from being in a house full of cats so she had to learn when she could eat and explore?)

What's puzzling is that she is quite happy for us to stroke her under the bed but we guess that's just because that's where she feels most safe - we will try to ignore her completely while under there from now on and see how that goes.

Would a change in eating maybe help to keep her calm when around food or is that likely to cause more problems? She will have a bowl of wet food at about 6am, a flat bowl of dry food at around 6pm followed by a small handful at around 9pm to see her through the night. However, despite these timings she will eat the lot in one go (presumably again because of the potential for other cats being around in her mind?). We therefore try not to treat her too much though she isn't exactly a big cat as it is and we're very mindful of not feeding her too much generally.

Something we think has upset her was that she was neutered by Cat's Protection just before we got her, but her fur has now pretty much grown over where she had the operation and she is generally looking a much brighter, healthier cat as she was very small when we got her. We did have a couple of mishaps with her latest injections too which has probably upset her - we had to have 2 visits to the vets instead of just 1 follow-up as they gave her the wrong brand to start with for her second injection!

Thanks for all of your replies - we're getting great ideas of what to try next and it seems we're nowhere near the only ones

Shoxt3r

cottage_retreatist wrote: »

When we got our new rescue (4 years ago) she was like this, we forgot we had her for 2 weeks cause she hid behind the sofa and only ate if we pushed a plate behind the sofa for her to eat from!

We just gave her time and didn't do things we knew made her distressed. So didnt try and pick her up, or make sudden movements if she came towards us. Took almost 2 years but she's super loving - not like if we'd had her as a kitten, so still runs at sudden movements, and won't be picked up, but she comes up to us for hugs and sits close to us at night. It was our other cat who brought her out of her shell. Do you have another one to support her?

Also feliway has always helped us. Hope that helps?

edited to say - you say you've tried feliway, try it just in the room where she hides and it takes a few weeks to kick into action so give it time!

Fortunately she is around enough to eat by herself and will ask for her food though it was understandably a very different story when we first got her. She will even eat with us just feet away. Your cat sounds very much like what we expect ours will be like - comfortable enough to have a hug but not confident enough to be held.

We don't have any other cats in the house, especially as Cat's Protection said she would be fine on her own. We used to have a cat about 8 months ago but we did, however, make sure to thoroughly wash or buy new items long before we took her on so that his scent wouldn't put a new cat off.

Feliway seems to be making a difference. We did have it in the same room as her hiding spot but decided to move it downstairs where all her things are as that's where she seems to spend most of her time. If anything it's the room where she is most nervous though... Maybe we'll try it in her hiding spot room, thanks for the advice!

JulieM

This may sound silly but try lying down on the floor quietly alongside the cat, nervous cats can feel less intimidated if you're at their level.

wort

Check out jackson galaxy on you tube he does some good advice on most issues with cats.