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Oh no - I'm about to crash a chain :(

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Oh ho.
A couple of months ago, me and the missus decided we're gonna need a bigger place for the additional member to our family that will be popping out of mummy's tummy pretty shortly.

Anyways, we got carried away with how nice the new builds were a mile up the road from us and were really excited to see how great the show home was and the range of extras we could order for a house.

So, we signed up for one & paid a small deposit. The builder then put us on their assisted move scheme where they sort out the estate agents etc and try to help sell our house for us.

A few weeks later we had sold, to somebody extremely excited about our property & they had just sold their house to 1st time buyers too. Perfect!

A couple of months later, and we're just waiting for the solicitors to get the final bits and bobs back and now its suddenly hit us that we're moving just up the road, to a little bit worser location (on a main road instead of the nice quiet cul-de-sac we are in now) and yes, we are getting a bigger house - but the realisation is that we're making a mistake.

So...we're about to pull out of buying the new build.
Okay, its going to cost us a few quid in lost deposit and solicitors fees. But I just feel so so guilty about letting down our buyers who have also spent money on this transaction.

Should I feel soooo bad. Or is does this happen from time to time.
We almost considered making the move anyway just to not upset anybody, but then I really think that we will regret our move within a short while because really we need to be moving to a better area all together.

Help!
:: No Links in signatures please - FM ::
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Comments

  • Chriswil
    Chriswil Posts: 276 Forumite
    It's a difficult thing to do, but with housebuying/selling you have to treat it as a clinical business decision. At the end of the day you have to do what is right for you and your family.

    Your buyer will be upset, but then you would be more if you ended up with a house you didn't like, If you are feeling really guilty you could offer to pay for their survey.

    HTH

    Chris
    Waddle you do eh?
  • Help!
    If it was ' a mile up the road ' you should have known the area ??
    but then I really think that we will regret our move within a short while because really we need to be moving to a better area all together.

    Then your better to give it a miss
    But I just feel so so guilty about letting down our buyers

    Write to them and apologize don't forget to pop a little cheque in the envelope, your GUILT will disapear.
  • SquatNow
    SquatNow Posts: 2,285 Forumite
    If you were talking about £50 it wouldnt be important, but it's the most expensive purchase you'll ever make, and you have to protect your families future.
    Bankruptcy isn't the worst that can happen to you. The worst that can happen is your forced to live the rest of your life in abject poverty trying to repay the debts.
  • robwend
    robwend Posts: 2,919 Forumite
    yeah give them there survey money . least you can do
    You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on
  • Mutton_Geoff
    Mutton_Geoff Posts: 4,020 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    Why break the whole chain? Pull out of your purchase but continue with your sale. Rent somewhere for 6 months to give you time to search for something more suitable, after all you already made the decision you'll need to move at some point.

    Renting takes away the stress of having to choose somewhere that might not be 100% right (as you have already discovered) and it will put you in an enviable buying position when you do discover the right place.
    Signature on holiday for two weeks
  • My parents had someone interested in their home & the sale seemed to be going through nicely - the new owners were the daughter & son-in-law of neighbours up the road, & they came round a few times to measure up etc. They got on so well with my parents (no mean feat, considering what my Dad can be like :D) that they exchanged phone numbers to keep in contact after the sale had gone through. Two months later, they were supposed to exchange at 12 noon, & my mother got a phone call from her solicitor at 12.05pm to say they'd pulled out of the sale. angry-smiley-030.gif She never heard from them again, not so much as an apology. My parents were devastated - they were moving overseas, so the buyers pulling out so late meant so much further down the line had to be cancelled, & it was almost a year before they felt up to going through all the rigmarole of estate agents again. Second time around, the house was sold without a problem, but I don't think my mum slept for weeks leading up to exchange in case the same thing happened again. Having said all of that, though they were so upset at the time, 6 months after the sale, settled in their new home, & they were better able to accept what had happened. They realised that they'd taken it so badly because they'd allowed their emotions to get too involved in the sale (though it's obviously hard not to do so), & now they warn everyone not to do that & just treat it is as a business deal.

    A home is the biggest thing you'll ever buy whether it's through a mortgage or not - whatever reasons you do buy it for, guilt shouldn't be one of them. If you're having misgivings now, that's your instincts telling you it's the wrong house for you, so don't go through with it. It's much better to pull out now than push yourself to go through with it, only to either pull out at the last minute or buy the place then hate every second you're there. My parents' experience taught me that you can't let emotions get in the way of the purchase, or let emotions blind you to issues/problems that are staring you in the face - what's an emotional issue to you is just a business deal to many, & they'll behave accordingly. No matter how well you get on with the other parties, it's your money they want not you as friends, so don't treat them as if they are. As upsetting as it is (& I do think pulling out on the day of exchange is nasty), I think buyers & sellers can't count on any sale actually being one until everyone's signed on the dotted line & money's been handed over. The offer of the survey money is a nice gesture if you can afford it, & they'll appreciate it, but don't let guilt get to you too much :).
  • Next time you go house buying turn your brain on first, very costly game not thinking things through.
  • mooncat
    mooncat Posts: 33 Forumite
    its purely a buisness deal. you dont owe anything to anyone.

    yes youve made a mistake by the sounds of it but you certainly dont owe anyone any money.Be fair and upstraight with them and explain why youve changed your mind.youll find people will understand as long as you tell them why i.m.o
  • pinkshoes
    pinkshoes Posts: 20,531 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    Why break the whole chain? Pull out of your purchase but continue with your sale. Rent somewhere for 6 months to give you time to search for something more suitable, after all you already made the decision you'll need to move at some point.

    Renting takes away the stress of having to choose somewhere that might not be 100% right (as you have already discovered) and it will put you in an enviable buying position when you do discover the right place.

    Good idea in theory, but not so practical when just about to give birth, then having to move twice in 6 months with a new born baby!

    Although saying that, if you CAN cope with 2 moves, then renting for 6 months+ will give you time to find the perfect house with less pressure. Some of my relatives have done this, as they didn't want to break their chain when the house they were buying fell through, so they moved into a rented house (with a 2 and 3 year old), and have since found a house they like even more to buy...
    Should've = Should HAVE (not 'of')
    Would've = Would HAVE (not 'of')

    No, I am not perfect, but yes I do judge people on their use of basic English language. If you didn't know the above, then learn it! (If English is your second language, then you are forgiven!)
  • ixwood
    ixwood Posts: 2,550 Forumite
    Sharpness. If the person you were (supposed to be) selling to came on here and posted, everyone would be sayimg you're a clueless muppet.

    I think selling anyway is a good idea. Gets you off the hook and outs you in a much better position to get a good deal on your next place,

    plus, In a potentially falling market, could work very well in your favour.
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