ex wont release me from mortgage

Seanymph

What a difficult situation - I had the same once, my ex partner did not earn enough to satisfy the mortgage company to enable him to take it into his name, so they kept me on it (no incentive for them really!)....

It won't cost you 5,500k for the divorce, no matter how difficult she is! Try a different solictor, and take comfort that it may well save you more than that in the long run.

I'm afraid that it seems you are not providing a room for your ex wife alone, but also for your children, which seems very reasonable - however I do understand your frustration.

It is always worth finalising these things, and getting a legally binding agreement - only then will you really be able to move on.

TBagpuss

Well, it could easily cost £5,500 for a divorce and financial settlement, If they can't reach an agreement, going all the way to a fully contested final hearing could be well above that, but it won't all be at once. Solicitors are required to give information about costs and most, for something like a financial settlement where the costs vary a lot, will give a range based on an average case. A divorce alone would be a lot less but a divorce alone isn't much use to OP, he wants a financial settlement.

I'd suggest that you get some proper advice from a solicitor, first, so you are clear about your options and how to acheive the outcome you want.

You can then self-refer for mediation and see whether you can reach agreement with your ex, and then go back to your solicitor if you are not able to reach an agreement.

As others have said, your ex can't take you of the mortgage. She can agree to sell the hosue, so you can both move on. Could she buy someone suitable for the chilnre if that happend? If not, a court may decide that allowing her to stay in the house, even if that means you have to rent in the mean time, is the best option to meet the children's needs.

Can she afford the mortgage and other outgoings at present?

Has she seen an independent mortgage broker, not just your current lender?

peachyprice

elsien wrote: »

Depends on the size of the house and its value, surely?
The court would look at the needs (not wants) of both parties and if these could be met by selling and each buying a smaller property then that would also be considered as an option.

The needs of the three children will come first. A court won't force a sale of an average family home so that the two adults can buy a two bedroom home each leaving the children sharing one bedroom between them, no matter what the 'wants' of the parents are.

But that's not to say OP should still be paying the mortgage on a house he's not living in along with full child support.

pinkshoes

pimento wrote: »

Move back in. If nothing else it would concentrate her mind.

^^^^^ This!

Just move back in!

I can only suggest you share the house so you share custody of the kids.

You could always have the house for two weeks each and the other lives elsewhere during this time!

rpc

peachyprice wrote: »

But that's not to say OP should still be paying the mortgage on a house he's not living in along with full child support.

And why should OP remain (jointly and severally) on the hook for the mortgage? The ex can stop paying and completely trash OP's credit record (possibly without OP finding out as he won't live in the house).

Courts don't want to make children homeless, but they also don't like leaving people on mortgages indefinitely. It will depend on the specific circumstances and overall financial situation.

Red-Squirrel_2

pimento wrote: »

Move back in. If nothing else it would concentrate her mind.

Such a !!!! move though.

peachyprice

rpc wrote: »

And why should OP remain (jointly and severally) on the hook for the mortgage? The ex can stop paying and completely trash OP's credit record (possibly without OP finding out as he won't live in the house).

Courts don't want to make children homeless, but they also don't like leaving people on mortgages indefinitely. It will depend on the specific circumstances and overall financial situation.

No, you're right they wouldn't leave someone on the mortgage indefinitely, it's usually until the youngest has finished full-time education if no other agreement can be reached.

gingercordial

OP, think it through this way.

How much equity is in the property now? Deduct something for selling fees.

Assume (for the moment) you agree to sell the property and your wife gets 50% of the equity. That is her deposit for a new house.

How much would a smaller house cost where she lives that is big enough for her and the three kids?

Using the deposit from the sale of your current house, would she be able to get a mortgage for the amount she would need to buy this house? Remember to include stamp duty.

If the answer is no, would it make a difference if you gave her more of the equity? What if you gave her all of it, could she get a mortgage for a suitable house then? If so this may be the best way for you to present this. OK, you don't get any equity, but if you can persuade her to sell you would at least get off the current mortgage.

If there's no way she could get a mortgage on her own for a suitable property, even if you gave her all the equity, then it's unlikely a judge would order the house to be sold because the kids do need somewhere to live and at the moment that is what they have. But it will depend on the specifics.

Fireflyaway

Legally I have no idea but I'd want to remove myself from the mortgage. What if your ex wife doesn't pay and the house is repossessed?
Can you sell and she could move to a cheaper place? I don't see why she is entitled to stay there? So long as you pay towards the kids upkeep I don't see why you should do more than that.
Get legal advice.

jimbo747

Yeah I'd move back in, Walter White style.