Help.....Anyone.....Please?

Darksparkle

littlewing_uk wrote: »

Thank you darksparkle
What happens about the fact that benefits are based on previous earnings whereas the next year they will be completely different and much lower?

Tax credits are based on the previous year income unless the current year income increases/decreases by £2,500

littlewing_uk

FBaby wrote: »

In the end, you are free to do what you want, and if that means working as little to maximise your benefits, that is indeed your choice. However, you might want to consider the impact on your decision long term.

I think many people who make the choices you are considering are going to face a shock when they become accustomed to that lifestyle and then see it all disappearing when their kids are grown up. The system has a lot sympathy to families without dependents. You have 20 years ahead of you of this balance lifestyle that suits you, but what about the next 20 years? If you think it's hard working your current hours now between you and your wife, how do you think you'll feel doing so in the 20 years time, for another 20 years or more, when you got used to working half that?

People who go for the minimum work maximum benefit always say that they will go back to work FT when their kids start primary/secondary school, but the reality is that for one they struggle to do so as jobs are more likely to go to those already working FT, and adjusting to working FT after years of PT is as hard as the other way around is easy. That's not even considering retirement.

It's easy to live in the present, and you are free to do so, but don't become one of those who then moan when those who opt to work hard become 'rich' and enjoy a much better life in their 50s/60s, and moan about how it's not fair and people like you should continue to be entitled to a nice comfy life forever.

I understand and completely agree. Thanks for such a level headed and helpful post

Tabbytabitha

littlewing_uk wrote: »

Thanks. Basically as long as i can be sure of a certain amount in benefits, then i know we will be ok.
We keep our outgoings low anyway, one loan and one car payment, other than that, we dont have credit.
Having been in senior management for so long, i am enthusiastic about a life change, but cant do it at the expense of the family of course.

There is never any certainty about benefits - they can be changed or withdrawn at any time, even if claiming due to ill health.

FBaby

Just one thing to add to take into consideration. Children under the age of 10 do not cost that much. You can get cheap clothing and they don't really care. They are happy to be taken to the park, free events, and are happy with cheap presents for birthdays/Christmas.

However, as we discover, this changes drastically when they get into teenagehood. School trips are not £20 any longer but in the £100s and you feel bad when you have to tell your kids they can't go with their friends. The pair of jean you got on sale for £10 at Tesco is now £25 or more because they need adult size and they don't want supermarket clothing for fear of being laughed at.

Of course you don't have to buy them the latest mobile phone, but they will still want something half decent and multiply this by 4 and it gets expensive. Add clothing for prom, beauty/sanitary products, activities and kit to go with it because they want to do them as like their friends, and then they turn 17, and although they have a part time job, they still wish they could start driving lessons like their friends, but can't afford them on their week-end job. Worse, they are considering giving up their studies so that they can work to afford the things that their friends' parents are paying for them.

I could have gone on a life of benefits when I became a single mum, but I chose to stick to my FT job. At time it was horrendous, I was exhausted AND poor, but looking back, I'm so glad that money is not holding my kids' prospects, and I can give them not a life of luxury but a life of opportunities.

[Deleted User]

littlewing_uk wrote: »

Thats interesting, i shall have a read now.
Some days are not an issue, others are pretty hard. I dont want to claim for it until its necessary, and that day may not come.
Thanks for the useful info, i will look at it later

For PIP the issues have to exist 50% of the time. It might be worth doing the assessments and reading about it as you've said. It isn't an easy thing to claim for and its best to get advice from an organisation that specialises in fibromyalgia to help you fill in the form etc. I received advice from Arthritis UK believe it or not.

Doctors may not recognise it (I can't comment on that, it does exist) but perhaps you need to ask for a specialist referral if you haven't already.

I had a 22 year old who in teen years was a bit conscious of the Primark label on clothes, when I could I went to charity shops and bought labels from there, its surprising how often you can find suitable items and for less than new at Primark. I'm sure it still embarrassed my older son at times, but no one knew but him and me. My younger son has been dressed almost entirely from cheap shops/ebay. Saved me a fortune compared to my older son (Ebay wasn't as good when older son was a toddler, cheap shops just didn't exist like they do now) and he's a lot 'better' dressed too. But there are many times when I just have to say no.

But inevitably, we are very cash strapped (we all have ASD, I had to stop working to become a carer, it was a choice but I didn't have much of a choice given their schooling problems.., I had to have too many days off to look after them).

Lioness_Twinkletoes

littlewing_uk wrote: »

With 4 kids, id rather spend my time with them

Well I am sure you would, but you chose to have the children and I fail to see why the taxpayer should fund your more relaxed lifestyle