How did it come to this?

erniethecat

i have been living with my human mum for 5 years. We live in the US, but mum is a proper englander. She's been debt free before, but depression and anxiety and loneliness make her spend money. Last year her boss threatened to fire her multiple times. She realized she's getting old to get a new job (she's 45), and she has no retirement. She earns a good wage, but she still has cc debt.

I told her we can't go on like this. I'm 9 - I won't be with her forever - and while I am, I want to know where my food is coming from. So together we're going to get it together. I don't know how bad it is because she won't tell me. But as you can tell, I'm a reading, typing cat boy, and I can find out. But not till I've had my before-lunch-nap.

redofromstart

Happy new diary Ernie, and good luck with your journey. Do you read with your bottom like my furry friends?

erniethecat

Sometimes I read with my bottom Red. But I'm a fast typer mostly because I use all four paws. I learned while she was out!

Ok, SOA time. Good news. She has enough to pay the lump sum of her taxes, her health insurance and has some left over :-) And, since she didn't have a holiday in 2017 she's due one in 2018, and has the money for that already!

Bad news. I have no idea what she spends all her money on. It's not me! There's a definite dearth of treats in this house, and I'm pretty sure the tins of food are being rationed. :-(

Here goes (and it's in dollars so it'll seem all weird, but the maths is okay. I have 18 fingers and toes, so I counted it twice).

Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet

Household Information
Number of adults in household........... 1
Number of children in household.........
Number of cars owned.................... 1

Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 5833
Partners monthly income after tax....... 0
Benefits................................ 0
Other income............................ 0
Total monthly income.................... 5833

Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 0
Secured/HP loan repayments.............. 0
Rent.................................... 1735
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 0
Electricity............................. 60
Gas..................................... 0
Oil..................................... 0
Water rates............................. 20
Telephone (land line)................... 0
Mobile phone............................ 0
TV Licence.............................. 0
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 80
Internet Services....................... 0
Groceries etc. ......................... 606
Clothing................................ 0
Petrol/diesel........................... 40
Road tax................................ 10
Car Insurance........................... 118
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 0
Car parking............................. 0
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 0
Other child related expenses............ 0
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 1237
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 29
Buildings insurance..................... 0
Contents insurance...................... 0
Life assurance ......................... 0
Other insurance......................... 0
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 0
Haircuts................................ 0
Entertainment........................... 289
Holiday................................. 0
Emergency fund.......................... 0
Business Services....................... 225
Shopping................................ 1171
Total monthly expenses.................. 5620


Assets
Cash.................................... 1350
House value (Gross)..................... 0
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 5000
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 6350

No Secured nor Hire Purchase Debts

Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Chase..........................5567......56........0
Citi...........................2950......44........0
Total unsecured debts..........8517......100.......-


Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 5,833
Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 5,620
Available for debt repayments........... 213
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 100
Amount left after debt repayments....... 113

Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 6,350
Total HP & Secured debt................. -0
Total Unsecured debt.................... -8,517
Net Assets.............................. -2,167

Created using the SOA calculator at stoozing.com
Reproduced on Moneysavingexpert with permission, using other browser.

Entertainment, business services and shopping. No clue what that is. I think it includes other things on the list like haircuts and presents and clothes. Time to get Sherlock! And, since it says she has $213 for debt repayment without making any changes, we're doing that now. Don't tell her. I want it to be a surprise. Like when I sneak up on her in the night and bite her toes hahahahahahahahahahahaha.

erniethecat

I let mum sleep in this morning. But I was starving so I had to stand on her head and meow in her ear so she'd get up and feed me. And then she tried to go back to bed. I lay on the pillow and stared at her until she got up. I can't do everything around here!

Tasks for today:

See if we can switch out the DVR for a non-dvr box. The tv comes free with the apartment, but the dvr does not. Since we don't record anything (don't tell anyone but mum hasn't worked out how), we might as well save those $30 a month.

Do some laundry. Seriously. I'm sitting on the pile right now and it's like Everest.

Try some shopkick. It's an app and you go into different stores and it gives you points that you can redeem. I don't know how well it's going to work, but she'll be out and I can nap :-)

Do some swagbucks. I'm really good at just clicking the button for the next video on the ipad. It's like it was made for paws!

redofromstart

Happiness is a warm (clean) washing pile isn't it Ernie?

Good luck with the DVR thing.

Karonher

A number of things stand out: -

Nearly £450 for shopping is a lot for the 2 of you. If you are missing out it must be caviar and champagne for her.

Is that the cheapest the medical cost can be? I don't know how it is worked out so it could be that she has a good deal.

It would be worth finding out what business services and shopping covers. If that can be cut there can be more paid off each month.

beanielou

What a very very clever cat you are

erniethecat

Thanks Beanie. I do like to think of myself as a very clever cat!

Well Red, the warm washing pile is gone. I'll be sleeping on the end of the bed tonight. It doesn't smell as good and I sometimes get kicked but at least we can see the floor in case of mices.

We shopkicked and swagbucked and prolific academiced and we made $33! It's amazing how many surveys want a 9 year old cat as their target demographic :-) I'm exhausted :-(

DVR shop was closed so that was a bust. Next week.

Karon - you're right. I haven't seen the man who brings the shopping bring champagne OR caviar. And i think I'd notice caviar, because fish eggs.... YUMMY! Gotta get on and work out where all that's going.

The medical costs are stupid because it's the USA. $600 a month for the insurance, and then $8000 for the deductible - like an excess - that has to be divided up over the months. Since she takes enough medication to fell a horse (and which would cost about $3K a month on it's own) it's important and probably not the first thing to look at cutting.

Tomorrow I'm going to interrogate Mint to find out what those business services are. Well, you know, between naps!

MeenaM

Well done Kitty! I thought Trump was trying to reverse Obama Care so maybe it will result in lower medical insurance for you because that figure is off the chain insane!

enjoy your naps today ,

redofromstart

Eric, I think the key thing is to work out the things that you can influence. If the medical costs are fixed then you just have to work round them. Food is usually one of the things that can be controlled as is entertainment. You could help by catching wee beasties and lovingly presenting them to your human at 3am. This would provide food, entertainment and exercise for both of you - and all for free.

erniethecat

Meena - actually Obamacare works out better for us, so we're crossing my fingers that they don't get rid of the things that are helpful to us. If they take out the provision for pre-existing conditions, we're screwed, because mum has long-term chronic conditions :-(

Red - you're right! Catching mices is food, entertainment AND exercise!! I like catching cockroaches too, though I leave the legs - I only like the white meat :-) But, I just brought up my breakfast, so perhaps I should steer clear of non-tinned food for a while! (I did it on the wood floor not the new carpet though :-)))) )

I got very confused by one of the services we're paying to business services, but I think I have it down to $5/month. The other one is $30/month and I think we're going to keep that for now. It's very helpful when I need someone to make phone calls for me - not everyone understands meows. $225 to $35, so we just saved .... wait, I need another paw .... $190?

Ok, she's off to church and another shopkicks walk, and I'm off for a post-breakfast nap. See y'all later.