Childcare is bloody expensive!

arbroath_lass

PeppaCoin wrote: »

Spendless- I would struggle with weekend work as husband works 5 out of 7 days which often includes weekends but might have to look into evening work. It's pretty hard to swallow when you already work a 45hr week, plus travel then have to fit in running the house too!

I think what Spendless meant was one of you gives up your current employment and finds work outside the other's work day. Common sense would say it should be your husband working evenings and weekends as you earn more. That way someone is always at home for the children. It's what my parents had to do.

batg

What a mess we are in where parents MUST go to work to pay other people to look after their kids in order to pay for ridiculously priced rent and mortgages (and Chelsea tractors, and cable TV and mobile phone contracts, and holidays and credit cards etc etc)

You can't have your cake and eat it.

Mortgage lenders are the winners at the end of the day when house prices in some areas are 4x what they were only 20 years ago.
And kids who are being looked after by someone else for 10 hours a day are the losers

thriftylass

batg wrote: »

What a mess we are in where parents MUST go to work to pay other people to look after their kids in order to pay for ridiculously priced rent and mortgages (and Chelsea tractors, and cable TV and mobile phone contracts, and holidays and credit cards etc etc)

You can't have your cake and eat it.

Mortgage lenders are the winners at the end of the day when house prices in some areas are 4x what they were only 20 years ago.
And kids who are being looked after by someone else for 10 hours a day are the losers

Again please refer to my post no. 61. That's the only option some people have. We both had extensive education which would be wasted if one of us took a break of a few years, our job doesn't come in part time or just evening and weekend work. Should we not have had kids? My kids turned out fine btw. and are well loved. We make the most of the time we do spend with them. Not everybody sitting at home with them 24/7 is guaranteed to be a better parent.

I find posts like yours very judgemental

It's not just the working mums/dads that driven up house prices, often it's foreign investors, second home owners and other more complex reasons.

Comms69

batg wrote: »

What a mess we are in where parents MUST go to work to pay other people to look after their kids in order to pay for ridiculously priced rent and mortgages (and Chelsea tractors, and cable TV and mobile phone contracts, and holidays and credit cards etc etc)

You can't have your cake and eat it.

Mortgage lenders are the winners at the end of the day when house prices in some areas are 4x what they were only 20 years ago.
And kids who are being looked after by someone else for 10 hours a day are the losers

But you don't NEED to go to work. That's the key point.

onlyroz

katiegizmo wrote: »

The best thing we found, as someone else has mentioned, is finding other people in a similar situation and pooling resources. My new parent friends now our eldest is at school have been such a help as they have my child sometimes and I have their child(ren) in return and we all save a little bit here and there. This works really well on the breakfast club/ after school club runs. Sometimes feel my head will explode as every day is different with family members and extras going to different places! Other than that it's gritting teeth and counting down to the 15/30 hours etc

Please be aware that reciprocal childcare arrangements might be illegal unless you are OFSTED registered and have had the relevant police checks. The law is hazy but people have been prosecuted in the past.

Fireflyaway

Yes childcare is expensive and it annoys me where nursery's are concerned because the workers are usually paid so low.
Do you have as spare room? Getting an au pair could be better value. Of course they have to live in, but the cost is quite low compared to nursery. They can be more flexible with hours and babysit so you can have a night out. They can help with house work too.
The other thing to remember is it will get better. I remember my nursery bill coming to about a third of our household income and we only have one child.
Long term can you increase your income? Get some more qualifications or seek another job? The power to change is in your hands.

ViolaLass

andydownes123 wrote: »

Spending all my wages for someone else to see my child all day seems the wrong way to approach having children in the first place.

It can be great.

I'd get so bored if I had to look after my daughter full-time. I can just about manage 2 days in a row then I need to do something else.

You can love your children without wanting to be with them all the time.

Savvy_Sue

onlyroz wrote: »

Please be aware that reciprocal childcare arrangements might be illegal unless you are OFSTED registered and have had the relevant police checks. The law is hazy but people have been prosecuted in the past.

I thought they'd backed down on that: the high profile one I remember was the two policewomen who did reciprocal childcare.

If no money changes hands, I don't believe there's a problem, even if it's regular.

Kim_kim

Comms69 wrote: »

But you don't NEED to go to work. That's the key point.

House prices are high, that’s a fact.
What do you suggest people do when one wage won’t get or pay a mortgage? Never have children?
My daughter & her partner don’t have a choice, they need both wages to pay the mortgage & live.

Kynthia

Savvy_Sue wrote: »

I thought they'd backed down on that: the high profile one I remember was the two policewomen who did reciprocal childcare.

If no money changes hands, I don't believe there's a problem, even if it's regular.

I'm fairly sure you're right. If you aren't immediate family you can't charge for childcare but there is nothing to stop friends taking it in turns to look after both their children.

You'd think childcare was some awful thing the way some people talk. My children go a couple of days a week and love it. It's a full day of attention, friends, playing and crafts, with more toys than we have at home and they have time to play in the garden 3 times each day. I can't compete with the fun, attention and variety that nursery gives them. I have to cook whereas a separate chef does that there, i need to wash up, do laundry, ironing, put away clothes, clean, etc. I need to leave the toddler while I get the younger one to nap which doesn't always happen quickly. Coming with me while I try to do the food shopping or pop to the chemist isn't as fun as doing potato prints.