Debt cleared in full... so why do I feel so bad?

CHlHlRO

Thanks to an inheritance, I've finally been able to pay off the one debt that's lingered on since all my other creditors accepted my full & final settlement offers, about six years ago now. It's kind of funny really, I was gifted a sum of money by my mum specifically to clear all my debts, made the offers and only one refused to accept. We paid everyone else off and stuck the rest in savings, hoping to add to it and make a better offer at a later date. Husband's car then packed up, and we ended up paying for it with that money, only for that one remaining creditor to THEN turn around and say they were willing to accept the offer after all! Oh how I laughed that day. Anyway, I've now paid the bloody thing off in full due getting this inheritance (still got an ancient student loan outstanding but no other consumer debt)... so why do I feel so crap about it? Surely I should feel freed, lighter, SOMETHING positive? Is this kind of remorse usual for a DFW? I remember feeling elated after paying off a store card I stupidly got whilst I was a student, albeit years before I got married and had to deal with husband's debts too. I wouldn't have run up the credit card bill if the cat hadn't got herself run over and we didn't have pet insurance... I felt great when I handed over that final payment to Dorothy Perkins, so why do I feel so rubbish now I've cleared my old credit card?

Jenniefour

Maybe it's because you no longer have to spend the time on energy on dealing with your debt, and it' not lurking there at the back of your mind - it was one of your main aims and you've achieved it. You need something to replace it with, or just let other things in your life fill that void. Some people experience similar after passing exams when they've been slogging away for years to get their qualification/degree. It can feel like an anti-climax and/or there's a void for a while.

tealady

Hi
I think sometimes when a debt is paid off peple (myself included) look at all the stupid mistakes made and crap bought and realise that life could have been a lot better.
Well my solution was to tell myself we all come into this world with nothing, we leave it with nothing so there is no point sighing for what could have been. It is time to look forward and enjoy being debt free.
The low feeling is normal I think, but don't look back as the past is dead and gone.
HTH

-taff

You've achieved a goal. Sometimes we get a bit dow when we do that because we have nothing else to strive for.

Find something else to strive for.

Happierdays

Well done on "finishing it off"! I can relate to your post as we have recently had a sort of windfall in the form of redundancy money and though this is enough to pay off our debts (and some mortgage) I've not been jumping up n down for joy... not sure why! We have not used it to pay anything off yet as still waiting for hubby's new job to officially start but I think maybe it's common to feel sense if anti climax after being in debt so long?! Anyway... here's to debt freedom! All the bestime to you.

zippygeorgeandben

Or have a think of 'worse case scenarios' in life and think 'I'm prepared for that.'

sourcrates

I always feel sick after paying money to debt collectors.

I find a few bottles of prosecco elevates the mood somewhat !!

HairyHandofDartmoor

I think that you're feeling a sense of anticlimax similar to after taking an exam, as another poster suggested.

When it sinks in that you are debt free, have some prossecco as sourcrates suggests :beer: .

I feel angry with myself and DH that we've spent his entire pension paying off debts, when we could have used that same sum to reduce our mortgage almost to nothing :mad:. But being debt free is worth celebrating :T.

I think you need a new goal to give you purpose. How about saving to be mortgage free? Or for a fabulous holiday paid for with money you've saved?

StopIt

As the above (Love the Username by the way) poster put it, you need to now find something positive to aim for, rather than clearing the negative of debt.


Set a savings target for something, anything really. Make it realistic but challenging and when you meet your target and get the reward for doing so, that will feel pretty good.


Ending a bad relationship with debt should be a relief, but it isn't always a feeling of elation for some, but that's no reason to feel even worse!


Forget about your past debt, and look into the future.

CHlHlRO

Husband wants us to use the bulk of the rest for a deposit and get a mortgage. Probably sensible, just feels "dull", even though I don't particularly want a holiday or any other kind of "treat". Good knowing that the feeling of anticlimax (that's it exactly) isn't uncommon!

Thank you, folks

Happy_Kitties

CHIHIRO after I completed my IVA I felt really down, the IVA company were really good when I said how I felt bec u do slog away at debt busting for so long.
I took a step back to allow things to sink in putting in the monies I would have paid to the IVA into a savings account. But I stuck with the forum as I really enjoy my new money saving ways and challenges
and then set about working on new goals-project DIY back bedroom was one as I just couldn't afford to decorate before.
Other posters are def right, new goals and looking to the future.
I got a big kick out if the fact that not only was I able to decorate, I didn't do it using credit cards-a first for me.
Things will come good but don't forget to give urself a pat on the back for clearing ur debt, it's a massive achievement