Budget for childs Xmas present

MrsSippi

I have 2 children and SIL just has the one and every year I am unsure how to work out a budget for Xmas presents. Should I just suggest a set budget for each child so in effect SIL is spending twice as much on our kids as what we spend on hers or do I spend the same on her one child as she would split between my two?

There haven't been any arguments or anything but every year I have the same dilemma so would really appreciate some thoughts on this.

So say for example we set a budget of £20 per child, should I spend £40 just on her one child to make it fair as she has to buy for 2 or should I just spend £20 while she spends £40?

Again, there haven't been any disagreements about this (though i suspect there may be if we try and discuss it!) but I just can't decide what is the fairest way to do this. As an aside, we are not well off so I am trying to keep costs down where I can but equally I would spend a bit more if that is the better thing to do.

lika_86

How about you both spend what you're comfortable spending and on something your children would like?

georgie262

I think you're overthinking this. Buy the child a nice gift that you think they will like - cost doesn't come into it for me the child will (usually) appreciate anything they are given. My children are very often head over heels for a present that cost pennies passing over their more expensive presents in favour of it.

MrsSippi

Thanks for the replies. I think, taking into account the responses, I will follow my gut on this (and disregard everything I originally said!) and just buy a nice present I've seen rather than focus on looking at the cost first so in this case I will spend £25 which I am happy to spend and deal with it that way.

kingfisherblue

My sister and I decided on a maximum amount to spend on nieces and nephews. I have a much lower income, but she has an extra nephew to buy for. Her children and one of mine tend to prefer money these days, so we go with the maximum amount. For gifts, I tend to suggest something that isn't at the top end of the agreed budget, but something that will be appreciated, for my other son (last year, Jackie Chan DVDs - he loves them!).

I think it's more important to buy something that they will enjoy than to aim to spend a specific amount.

mark5

Spend what you want to spend if your sil thinks your not being fair she can always reduce what she spends next time.

My wife had a close friend who always wanted to increase the amount spent on kids presents as she had very little family so wanted her kids to receive more expensive presents from the few they did get them from, it wasn't realistic for us though as we had quite a few nieces and nephew's to buy for so stuck to our budget.

System

I would just spend X amount per child, regardless of whether the child has brothers and sisters or not.

Loz01

Just set an amount per child - yes she's spending more because you have more kids, but thats life. Doesn't mean her child should get a doubly expensive present, if you say £20 per kid then stick to it, if someone has 7 kids or 1.

onlyroz

Do people really discuss between family members how much they are going to spend on them?

MrsSippi

onlyroz wrote: »

Do people really discuss between family members how much they are going to spend on them?

Thanks for all the replies, they have been very helpful.

Re the above comment I have been thinking about this because in the few years of giving gifts for her lo I have gone out of my way to find nice gifts (though not necessarily expensive) which have always been popular and have bought them in sales so I can get more for my the money etc so we have turned up with a present or presents costing anything up to £30 but then my 2 are given presents costing £10 each (price tags are always left on) and although I know you don't give to receive I must admit I do feel a little bit annoyed because the kids are still young (all under 5) and 1 picture book doesn't really have same affect as a more thought about gift.

I have never said anything in the hope that the next xmas/birthday would be an improvement but there never really is (except for last Xmas when DH caught SIL in the kitchen after gift swapping frantically wrapping extra presents of her own daughter's to give to my 2 as she could see it was very uneven ). Mind you, it did backfire when her lo then had a major tantrum as she realised her own toys were being given away!

Given that she earns a lot more than we do I feel like she could at least make the same effort.

Either way, at least I have had some very helpful opinions on this so feel more happy that i am being fair by just focusing on a nice gift rather than the price tag.

ska_lover

MrsSippi wrote: »

Given that she earns a lot more than we do I feel like she could at least make the same effort.

.

Maybe she picks up on your seething resentment?


Sorry but your thread is everything that sucks the joy out of Christmas


Given that she earns a lot more than you do - she either:


1) spends a lot more time at work than you do
2) has a far more demanding and stressful job than you do


This woman is providing for her family, not sitting at home overthinking the minor intricacies of life


I don't have little kids, but we stopped doing Xmas years ago due to having a sister in law that behaved like she owned Christmas